Well, I never got as far into the truth as you did, my parents stopped going to meetings when I was 9, they were too inconvenient for them. They were never DFed for it though. I myself was never baptised, and waivered as far from the KH as I could. Now as a parent I am finding my way back to some degree. I want my children to have faith, but I find that most of the people that go to the local KH are terribly hypocritical. I have a friend that is a sister and she comes to my house for study, but doesn't pressure me to go back. I do know people that were DF'ed and then reinstated. I find myself in your shoes though. I have known this faith my whole life, I have even looked into other religions as an adult, but I find myself coming back to this one. However, I don't know that I want to pull my children into the JW's completely. I disagree with some of what they say, I feel to some degree that while they spread the truth they have put a twist of control on it. I don't know that the WTS is fully in the right, and I question some of what they say also. I am not shy with my questions, I come with them fully and openly. I smoke, and have considered quitting but have not been able to thus far. I was surprised to see so many in my same state of "faith" when it came to the JW religion. It just raises more questions for me. Especially the treatment that you received from the elders. I thought that those that were DF'd were to be shunned and treated with reproach. Anyhow, I guess I am just trying to find my niche. But know that you are not alone. I hope that you find your niche.
4thought
JoinedPosts by 4thought
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New member, question thats been asked many times, but how do you feel ?
by Greyeyes ini came across this site, and while still my upbringing says i should stay away from such site, i had to join.
a bit of a background about me.
i'm 31, my parents became witnesses when i was born so they could give me the best upbringing they felt possible.
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Should I write/ call my sisters?
by love11 ini know that i asked before whether or not you thought i should talk to them again.
but i can't help feeling so guilty as to how things were left.
i know that they are at fault for us not having a relationship but i feel like the last words we say to each other shouldn't be mean just in case something should happen to one of us.
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4thought
Family doesn't always come in blood relation. I have a big family and I try my best to get along with all of them, but their lives are sorted and far different from my own. I have resolved myself to believe that I can find my "family" ties in places I least expected them. Friends that I dearly love, my own husband and children (of course), and my in-laws. I am close with my mom and can speak with my siblings on a limited basis, but I have solice in the fact that those that love me are there to support me and in turn receive my unconditional love and support, and those that are hostile are never going to be happy to any degree. Bitterness and self loathing are often projected onto those that are truly happy rather than dealt with as inner conflicts. It may be that your sisters have closets that are occupied and feel that they must put you down in the eyes of others because you have the happiness that they long for. I would not let them hinder your spirit, I would pity their lack of self worth and pull tighter to those that truly love you.
Life is what we make of it, not what we wait to be handed.