Layla33

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Posts by Layla33

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  71

  Criticism worthy of your time

  by johnnyc in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  as i read posts throughout this site, i became amazed at some of the criticism people have actually spent time creating, reading (as i did), and responding to.

  dont get me wrong, some of what i read are good issues that seem worthy (to me) of discussion, but to be honest, i find that 90% of the posts are based on ridiculous petty topics that are obviously tied to a sense of deep hatred of the wtbts.

  i can appreciate that some of the people who leave such post, and have this hatred, are taking their time to discuss such things as part of a therapeutic process to combat the fact they spent a large portion of their life dedicated to an organization they feel abandoned them at some point.

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  Layla33

  People coming out of a cult need to vent. It you don't like that, just get your scroll on...
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  67

  God dammit!!! I hate this cult!

  by bluesbreaker59 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  so my girlfriend and i are getting very serious, and i've bought her engagement ring, should be done being built sometime in may.

  then at some point later, i'm going to ask her to marry me.

  she was with me and picked out her ring, so she knows its coming.

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  Layla33

  Bluesbreaker,

  You are doing right and your feelings are normal, don't let ANYONE take away from your wonderful occasion.

  It's terrible that they do this type of ostracizing to people and I am one of those people who was married, but the truth is I didn't even invite my family because I already knew how they would respond, it's their loss. I understand both sides, but it's a realism that is best faced honestly.

  I wish you the best, and don't be too down, rise in the face of other people's ignorance.
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  31

  Do JW's attract the mentally ill, or do their beliefs cause mental illness?

  by gaiagirl in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  have you observed a higher than normal number of mentall ill among jw's?

  if so, do you think the religon attracts the mentally ill, or do you think that their beliefs and practices actually cause mental illness?.

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  Layla33

  Jankyn,

  Very very true. A very insightful post. I think that JWs and former JWs can suffer from depression, dissasociative personality disorder and on the other hand narcissitic disorders as well as severe delusions of grandeur. I think because of the verbiage like "the world" and "friends" and thinking that those in "the truth" are better than those that don't realize "the truth" breeds a disorted idea of yourself versus non-JWs...
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  76

  describe yourself in one sentence

  by wings in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i learned so much about you from the dream job topic.....just wanted to try again.

  .

  me: i'm the nicest smart ass you will ever know..

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  Layla33

  Cogito, ergo sum
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  34

  After fading, can you get away with DF'able sins?

  by inkling in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i ask this because a person i know who had a rather short fade.

  is now living a... lets just say a distinctly worldly life, and.

  the elders are simply looking the other way.

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  Layla33

  This just reminded me of someone I grew up with faded to go away to college, came back was real strong in the kingdom hall, then a girl he was having sex with regularly had his baby and she was giving him the child to take care of. Not only was he just privately reproved (which is a joke), he was completely supported with the child and no one said anything else about it. If I am not mistaken, he is an elder now.
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  64

  Long last letter to dad...please comment-not mailed yet

  by dawg in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  dad, .

  i doubt youll even read this letter since it comes from your son, a son youve abandoned over your religious views, but i wanted to write you one final letter to see if theres any hope that you can come to your senses as far as this religion goes and we can renew our relationship.

  im doing this because i care for you and mom deeply and feel very much distressed that you two refuse to see anyones opinion as being factual other than your own when it concerns the jw religion.

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  Layla33

  Beautiful letter. One suggestion, break the paragraphs up a little more, underline and bold key points. I think it will help.

  I wish you the very best. I know it's hard.
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  31

  Do JW's attract the mentally ill, or do their beliefs cause mental illness?

  by gaiagirl in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  have you observed a higher than normal number of mentall ill among jw's?

  if so, do you think the religon attracts the mentally ill, or do you think that their beliefs and practices actually cause mental illness?.

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  Layla33

  Yes and yes, I actually did a research paper on this, the empircal information is hard to come by, but I translated it into the general populace of religious people. One of the things that is in the training when studying mental illness is that an overly reliance on the supernatural and a reality that can't be explained in natural terms can be a foundation for mental disorders.

  I believe that people that have irrational ideas, have personality disorders and obsessive complusive disorders can not only be drawn to the religion, but that religion can nuture it. What I tell people all the time is that mental illness in itself is not a death sentence or a period in the sentence of life. The problem becomes that people with skewed and disorted issues in themselves and towards others and society at large may not get the help they need because the environment of religion can allow it to flourish.

  Someone with a "god-complex", someone with a irrational idea about themselves believes that are "annointed" and thus begins a road of reinforcement, but a continuation of the delusion.

  I wish I could write more and I am typing this very fast, but I wanted to write something. Back to work, I have a meeting in a few minutes, but this was something I wanted to respond.
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  63

  3 a.m. - my wife is in tears! What do I do?

  by The Scotsman in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  well my situation has developed a bit, any advice appreciated.. their has been a gradual building up of pressure ever since i stood down as an elder about 6 months ago.. i have been telling my wife about my doubts but have continued to attend "some" meetings.. as time has progressed i have become more open with my criticism of the org.. i mentioned the un scandal, molestation trials, false prophecy ect etc.. interestingly she does not deny these facts and yet still wants to continue as a jw.. i told her that god is not happy with people knowingly being part of a false prophet (deut 18 - etc) - starting to lay the groundwork for my exit.. she appreciates the difficult situation doubters are in - they cannot openly express their feelings for fear of jcs.. anyway, a few weeks ago we moved house which meant changing congregation.. but i felt it would be best if i did not attend meetings " at all" at the new cong so my fade could be easier.. but i could not have predicted my wifes response - when i told her it was an explosion of emotion, i mean real heartbreaker stuff.. she seems depressed at the prospect, perhaps the reality is finally hitting home.. last night, about 3a.m.

  i noticed that she was not in bed.

  i went downstairs and she was sobbing away to herself.. "i can't go to that hall myself!

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  Layla33

  Sometimes tears and conflict are necessary things in terms of growing as people. I am a firm believer in the conflict theory when it comes to personal growth and group dynamics.

  I think you can love her and show her love and help her to understand your path for individuality and how important it is to live as you think. Through this process a newfound identity for not only you, but your wife can occur. My hurt goes out to you, it's painful, but I think totally necessary.
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  20

  Do you hum?

  by Layla33 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i do and sometimes i do it when i am happy, when i have had a good meal, when a friend is on the phone and they went to do something - it's my musical interlude.

  i think some people hum without noticing it.

  i also used to hum to my brother, it was our way of communiting when we were young and a game we played where we would hum a tune and then each of us would try to give a verse.

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  Layla33

  I think it is really a soothing or calming function we do and I think it is a form of unconscious communication.

  The most interesting part is realizing that in other countries, there's a different connotation with the word. I love linguistics.
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  1320

  YOUR DAILY JOURNAL

  by compound complex in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  dear friends,.

  much of what we do on a daily basis is routine and of no particular, earth-shaking importance.

  however, after reviewing letters of family going back to wwii, it is fascinating to read what dad was doing on board the aircraft carrier in the pacific on any old day, what mom was cooking on her ever-steaming range, how i was dealing with the roller coaster of emotion at bethel [mom saved all my letters], how nana wrote that she would not study with the witnesses [per my request] but 'here are some mittens i knitted for you when you canvass new york with your magazines.

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  Layla33

  It's payday...