Terry, I am not going to get an attitude about what you do. I have spent time with a lot of family members during these times of crisis and while many have "their own faith". If you have told them your role and they kind of reject you, you could at that point, since your role is ultimately to listen, just ask them to tell you about their belief system and how that it comforts them. They might try to convert you a bit (I'm sure you are immune), but it gives them a chance to express themselves and know that you are a safe person. They do not want their belief system challenged as they are about to meet their maker. Or not, as the case may be. It might be a comfort for a JW or their family to express their belief as to what happens after death and how it comforts them. If they know you can listen, then if they(patient or family member) is feeling alone or scared, they will know you are a safe person to turn to for comfort. As you knowing, dying is not something that is particularly efficient or organized or predictable(as to details, obviously, we all die!). There will likely be times and opportunities that will bring you closer to them. If they keep rejecting your chaplain services, then take off your nametag and just bring them some cookies and hold their hand. That's my best suggestion.
JWdaughter
JoinedPosts by JWdaughter
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19
Hospice and JW
by Terry Clees ini am a bereavement coordinator with a hospice company.
i have noticed that most often jw patients decline chaplain care and also the family ends up declining bereavement care.
where i work our chaplains do not proselytize at all...they merely walk with the patient in their faith at the end of life.
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161
ARC Analysis Summary of Case Files
by Richard Oliver ini have been doing research on the arc as some people on here have suggested.
i find it interesting on the case file analysis some of the findings.
it looks like queensland and new south wales had the biggest problems with this.
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JWdaughter
So many of the accusations were made when MOST people did not report at all. So, that they were willing to report to the elders is kind of interesting. But here is a fact, at the time that most people, in general, did not report, I was a JW. I know what they were teaching about such things then. I KNOW that reporting anything against a "brother" that would make the WT look bad was specifically discouraged. Reporting ANYTHING to worldly authorities as said to be unfaithful to Jehovah. That is a plain fact, "Richard Oliver". So, this makes one ask-how many were REALLY abused in the congregation that never GOT to even the elders (because of a general restraint from discussing or reporting sexual abuse)? Then how many had someone's father address the issue to the perp and NEVER go to even the elders? If there was THAT MANY reported abuses during the decades when few reported this kind of abuse at all is telling. How many more were never reported?
This is disgusting. NO matter who did it or who they did it to, there is no justification for those numbers or statistics. All that history does is tell us that much worse happened than we will ever know.
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161
ARC Analysis Summary of Case Files
by Richard Oliver ini have been doing research on the arc as some people on here have suggested.
i find it interesting on the case file analysis some of the findings.
it looks like queensland and new south wales had the biggest problems with this.
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JWdaughter
Let's forget for a minute how many of the abusers were JW. Lets just consider for a moment that every one of the children were JW and every one of those children were subject to the WT style of justice. How many of the children were disfellowshipped for immorality like the boy in Maryland was? How many of them were disbelieved and the accusation dismissed? How many of them never felt safe in their congregation or their home because the WT men felt they did what they were required to do? How many had to restate the crimes against them to a body of elders? How many of them were grilled about how much they "screamed" or questioned as to whether they reported it to worldly authorities?
You can try to dismiss the JW abusers involved all day long, but you forget every time that nearly 2000 children were known to be victimized.
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The Syrian Dan-El
by schnell ini started reading deceptions and myths of the bible by lloyd graham tonight, and graham mentions that the book of daniel, like the story of joseph, is ripped off from a syrian poem about another hero named daniel (or dan-el).. a cursory google search doesn't pull up anything.
is this accurate?
has this ancient poem survived?
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JWdaughter
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Danel
Seems to be what you are writing about. Danel/Dnil is a character in 14th century BC, Ugartic text. Daniel is more than a 1000 years later. From wiki
"The text in Corpus Tablettes Alphabétiques [CTA] 17–19 is often referred to as the Epic of Aqhat. Danel was depicted as "judging the cause of the widow, adjudicating the case of the fatherless" in the city gate.[3] He passed through trials: his son Aqhat was destroyed but apparently in the missing conclusion was revived or replaced by Danel's patron god, Rp'u, who sits and judges with Hadad and Astarte and was likely considered to be the equivalent of El.
The text was published and translated in 1936 by Charles Virolleaud[4] and has been extensively analysed since then.[5]"
That's just the intro.
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42
Cooking With Cast Iron
by Simon ini can't even remember what got me interested in pans, probably wanting to try cooking more and watching some cooking videos on youtube, but i kind of started wanting to get a cast-iron skillet specifically so started reading up on them.
hey, if you're going to spend $50 on something you need to study them and create a comparison spreadsheet ... right?.
not only did cast-iron look great for cooking but there are some studies that show risks to aluminium / teflon cookware ... not that the wts was "right" about aluminium, but teflon can give off carcinogenic chemicals if overheated (so what if it chips off into your food?).
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JWdaughter
You can get cast iron cheap at garage or estate sales, So long as it isn't pitted, rust and dirt will come off with no problem. Go online for more direction. Much cheaper than new.
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19
Has your name or reputation been maligned by the Witness gossip-mill?
by stuckinarut2 inas we all know, witnesses routinely share in gossiping, slandering or maligning the name and reputation of those who are "spiritually weak" or ones who "fade" or "stop associating".. they feel it is ok to speak badly of such ones who "have left jehovah's organization".. of course, some of the worst perpetrators of this are elders and their wives, who insidiously plant negative stories in the minds of all they interact with in the congregation.
they may never have actual facts, but since when do facts matter to witnesses?
however through such conduct they manage to separate people from one another, or cause rifts amongst former friends.. this sort of conduct is plainly inappropriate.. but what scriptures could be used if the opportunity arose to confront such ones about the way they have behaved?.
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JWdaughter
I found out after I met a (former friend) that the scuttlebut was that I left the org for immorality and gave birth to a daughter. Which was a surprise to me as when I met the old friend, I was pregnant with my second child and my 3 year old son was there with me, but she asked where my older daughter was! The one who would be 8 or nine (I left at 15 and was 24 at the time of conversation).
When I was a senior in HS, I babysat a lot on game nights and was permitted to bring my little friend along with me to football and basketball games. I only attended about 3 or 4 with her, but one of them was the homecoming game and she rode with me on the parade float or whatever. And thus the rumor mill started.
This JW knew my mom well, she did not go to my school. She also went to meetings with me regularly during the time this baby was gestating and being born and growing into toddlerhood. She KNEW ME!!! I was not hiding a secret baby in my closet until I left the borg.
On another note, my mom has a very interesting version of our recent falling out that she is apparently advertising to the world. Her world is very small, but filled with folks I do care about. I won't play defence anymore. I won't play offence. I just won't play.
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39
In praise of Randall Watters
by nicolaou inexjw's of a certain age will remember randy's site well.
freeminds was instrumental in waking me up along with ray franz's books.
if net soup and armageddon okies mean nothing to you you're probably under 30.. whatever caused randy to post what he did recently is something i can only guess at but it won't be what i remember him for.. randy, i wish you well and thank you for all you've done over the years .
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JWdaughter
Randy and I corresponded years ago. I like the guy. He has done too much good to let one confusing post turn me off. I hope there is some peace here soon in this matter for everyone that I like and respect.
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61
Is this a normal JW practice? Warning, this will be a bit graphic.
by Sequoia inthis post may be disturbing and i apologize, but i'm just trying to find out if this is a practice the jw teaches.
i was taken advantage of by a guy claiming to be a jw preacher.
he took me to his house supposedly so i could give his daughter piano lessons, and then he basically forced himself on me while telling me he was in love with me and wanted to marry me.
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JWdaughter
If you can find out the congregation he attends, tell the elders. Since they aren't checking police blotters, they won't know of an accusation unless he is convicted or tells them. IF he goes to jail. Maybe. So, send them a copy of the police report. This might protect some people in his congregation, if someone knows. It might just be those close to elders, but. . .
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It's weird to look back at old family stories about our beliefs.
by schnell inmy parents had a story that the first time my dad ever met my mom's father, he opened the door and immediately asked dad, "what are you gonna do if my grandson needs a blood transfusion?!".
grampa was a ww2 vet, an airplane mechanic, a methodist and freemason.
he and my grandmother were pictured all my life as these ogres who opposed my mother's jw conversion and her marriage to my father.
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JWdaughter
It has bearing that both spouses agree ahead of time because for JWs it is a critical issue in that lives can be lost, relationships and marriages severed, jobs lost, all family ties effectively cut. . .yeah, it's good to have that one agreed to. Eternal daydream is the jw issue, here and now is for those who are awake and cognizant.
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63
Life is changing for me: no pioneering, got a job!
by Skepsis ina month ago i decided to register in this board.
i had decided to step down pioneering but was frightened about the consequences.
i had finished my university degree some months before (despite disaproval from brothers in my congregation) and i had to choose: continue pioneering and working in jobs with no future or starting a career, working full-time.. i was thinking to postpone the decisiton but... i was fed up with preaching.
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JWdaughter
If you aren't up for confrontation, move house to another congregation. You owe them nothing.