Posts by Smiles

Hate is a pretty strong word for me but I have to say I have no use for Techno Music. It's funny because I like everything from Rock to Country to some Rap to Classical to Jazz to Blues but I do not like any type of Techno.

Smiles

31

feelings of guilt

by confused and lost in

as some of you are aware i am in the early stages of doubting the wts as the only channel of truth.however i am assailed by feelings of guilt.am i being seduced by the words of disgruntled witnesses or ex-witnesses or am i truly doubting !

!maybe some of you felt this way in the early stages of your "defection" from the wts.sometimes i feel as though i am rejecting god and his organization but other times i feel so strongly that the wts has misled me and is acting to control my "loyalty" by vieled threats of destruction at armageddon.you see prior to becoming a jw i had no religious affiliations.i knew nothing about the bible or god.so for 20 yrs i have only known watchtower teachings and un-learning 20yrs of this is making me so indesicive.am i doing the right thing or not ?

my only solace is prayer.i have prayed to god to show me in some way what the truth really is.i must admit that these prayers have been the most heartfelt i have ever said.have others felt this way and if so how did they deal with it ?i would truly appreciate some feedback.

Smiles_Smiles

~HUGS~

Research gets some people's 'heads/minds/thinking' out of JWism. And Prayer gets other's hearts/emotions/feelings out of JWism. Different people make decisions from different drivers. Some are heart/emotionally driven more the head/thinking driven and others are just the opposite. And then some are more equally both. Even though religion usually appeals to the emotion, JWism traps thinkers as well with it's prophecies and academic way of teaching.

Soooo ... my 2 cents is ... recognize what drives you and try not to judge that part of you. No judgemnt equals no guilt. And if prayer means allot to you (because it seems you may be more of a heart person then a head one) use that avenue. And don't judge your answers by other's thoughts on what is right/wrong, good/bad, spiritual/non-spiritual. Love who you are and how you personally view and feel about an issue. Validate how YOU feel and see when others are influencing your feelings in a negative/unhealthy way.

You may have to live with guilt for a while until you give up your 'JW trained conscience/thoughts/emotions'. They will condemn you for even the most innocent and healthiest of things like relaxing on Saturday morning (instead of going out in service). Face that guilt every step of the way and look it in the face and see if it is reaonable or if it is just religion dictating to you what you are to do when you are intrinsicly a FREE person.

OK that's my 2 cents. Remember you can't buy bubble gum with 2 cents anymore. But I do so hope it helped. Many of us have traveled the road you are on ...

Much Luv and & Smiles

~IT WILL GET BETTER~

11

Suggestions needed?

by jc1985 in

jw
friends

.

well ive been raised in the truth for 20 years, and serve as an ms, but have overtime realized that its not actually the "truth".. any thoughts on how to best let it be known that im not interested in being a witness, and once thats accomplished how to assimilate myself into.

the "world", since ive been shut off from it for my whole life and programmed to believe every non witness is only interested in hurting others.. any thoughts would be helpful.

Smiles_Smiles

Welcome to the forum. You have decided to take a big step in your life. Congrats!!

As far as leaving ... many people choose different ways to do it. It really depends on what is most important to you. Family/Friends/Freedom/Approval/ etc.. THAT you probably have to decide for yourself and the decision will kind of point you to what is the best way for YOU to leave.

As far as the 'world' is concerned ... people are people. Use your intuition (not that stuff that's left over from your religious slavery ~ I'm talking deeper). Dont judge yourself as well as others. Be accepting of who you really are down deep once you drop all of the JW facods. That is the starting place of living life. That is the starting place of seeing what you are really like and who you will gel with in this world. Go out with co-workers, fellow students, etc. You will find people you want to hang with and people you dont. Be careful of attaching too much to any certain one or 'ideal' at least until you find your footing. You may go through people/friends and 'ideals' for a good while until you settle on who you really are w/o the religion.

Most of all ENJOY YOUR JOURNEY ... part of it has just begun. LIFE IS GOOD WHEN YOU SEE YOU TRULY ARE FREE!

Smiles,

21

new member from texas. looking for some advise

by confused&broken@texas in

jw
friends

hey, new member here.

just looking for someone close to my age and maybe has had similar situation for some advice.

at a cross roads and could use someone to help me make the walk across if that's what looks like i need to do for me & my children & my husband

Smiles_Smiles

Welcome. I am in Dallas. There are many who are close to your situation on this site rather they live close to Tx or not. You will find allot of support here.

Smiles & Luv

47

If You Were Single, Would You Ever Date A Married or Separated Person?

by minimus in

jw
friends

lately, i've seen more than a few unhappy couples go their own way and do their own thing.

one guy i know regularly dates women only on friday nights but comes home to his wife the rest of the time.

my impression is she doesn't want to know what he's doing------just as long as he comes home to her.. i know a state senator's wife who has 2 kids and she's miserable with her politician/lawyer husband but in public they look like the perfect couple.

Smiles_Smiles

Glad I could be the one to shock and appaul you on this day. One thing I dont do is argue or justify my thinking/feelings on subjects. I dont need the approval or validation. But thanks for the comments. Its great we are individuals and can show that in our thoughts and expressions.

Have a wonderful weekend Life is Good!

Smiles

47

If You Were Single, Would You Ever Date A Married or Separated Person?

by minimus in

jw
friends

lately, i've seen more than a few unhappy couples go their own way and do their own thing.

one guy i know regularly dates women only on friday nights but comes home to his wife the rest of the time.

my impression is she doesn't want to know what he's doing------just as long as he comes home to her.. i know a state senator's wife who has 2 kids and she's miserable with her politician/lawyer husband but in public they look like the perfect couple.

Smiles_Smiles

My 2 cents is ... Brace yourself because I live in left field most of the time ... :-)

I think it really depends on what each individual believes to be 'right/wrong' and the circumstance that individual is in at the time.

I do not claim to be nor would I want to try to attain to be in the category of 'a moral person'. To me I could care less about all that. One thing I am is authentic. For me personally, marriage is not worth the paper it is printed on allot of times nor worth the government that makes it valid. But committment and the desire to hold up your end of that committment does have value in my 'left field' world. For me marriage and the desire to hold up your end of a committment are NOT the same thing.

I am happily committed to a non-married man. And I can see us being together until we are both farting dust. I am pretty monogomous by nature but I know many (married and single) who are not. If I was "single" I can not see me 'dating' a married man. But there are guys in my past that if they were married or single and I was single that I would probably be open to having a sexual encounter with if either him or I wanted/needed it in our lives at the time.

That's my 2 cents ...

21

As a Parent Out of the Witnesses, Are We Helping Our Kids Education ?

by flipper in

jw
friends

checked my other threads and noticed i had not covered this in reference to our kids, thought it was important.

so, how are all you parents doing ?

do any of you have children, in their early 20's who are pursuing their education, and are they doing well ?

Smiles_Smiles

My daughter is 14 and is a Junior in HighSchool and taking concurrent courses in college (Freshman).

When we left JW a little over 3 years ago, one thing I took out of it was not to be attached to any organized 'have to's' that people give value to. So when she was in 5th grade and stressed out because the teachers were more into controlling the kids then teaching them, I pulled her out of public school to home school her. And to give her a much needed break from all of the people who want to control, gain authority and tell us what we 'should' think and 'should' do. I felt she needed time to get intouch with her own inner sense and guide. I couldnt see much difference between elementary school and JWism. Soooooo Controling ... That definitly could have backfired on me but I listened to my gut and did it anyway.

Well she finished 6th-8th grades in 2 years then decided to go to High School last year, which she also skipped a grade there. And last May she started college and is finishing out her High School credits concurrently while going to college.

Even when we were JWs I never geared her not go to college. It was going to be her decision. But now that we are out ... IT'S ALL GOODDD.

Smiles

Smiles_Smiles

Posts by Smiles_Smiles