daystar

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Posts by daystar

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  37

  I just got one of *those* calls from my son's school

  by daystar in

  1. social
  2. family

  *sigh* the joys of parenthood.. i just got a call from my son's school.

  he gets picked up by his after school care in a van.

  all the kids who get picked up are lined up outside to get ready for their rides.. my son decides it's a good idea to pick up a stick and throw it, hitting a car and putting a small dent in it.

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  daystar

  Ok, first I appreciate all your perspectives. This is my first child, so of course I frequently enough question if I'm doing the right thing.

  He and I had a conversation last night. I didn't tear into him. He started to blame another, older kid, and cry, saying it was the other boy's fault. Well, with a bit more prodding, this older boy told him to throw the stick down after my son had picked it up. And rather than drop the stick, or throw it down, he threw it out, and it hit the car.

  I had no doubt that he hadn't meant to hit the car, but I needed the details. I told him I understood that he hadn't meant to hit the car, but that picking up rocks and sticks is a no-no, especially at school, and especially throwing them! (Like we haven't had this conversation before, just as a matter of precaution.) I told him what the school was going to have him do and he submitted to that.

  I also explained that it didn't matter if another person told him to do something or not. He had to take responsibility (had to explain that word) for his own actions. And I gave him the example if I were to run into someone else's car, I would have to pay to have their car fixed because even though an accident, I was "responsible" for it.

  And of course, we had to talk about not doing what he knows he's not supposed to (picking up the stick) and not doing what other people tell him to do when he knows it's wrong. (I don't think the kid meant to throw it in that way.)

  But that wasn't the end of it last night. No details, but he was just having a bad day and ended up in his room for the rest of the night for unrelated things.

  But we ended the night on a good note, reading, talking and snuggling before bedtime. He got to talk to his mom for a bit and we talked about getting to see Santa Claus this weekend.

  For my part, it's helpful for me to have some perspective, that my son is not unusual in this sort of thing. (LOL! OMG! What is wrong with him? He's going to be a criminal! He's going to be an outcast! Oh the horror! Of course, I'm exaggerating, but you understand.)
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  37

  I just got one of *those* calls from my son's school

  by daystar in

  1. social
  2. family

  *sigh* the joys of parenthood.. i just got a call from my son's school.

  he gets picked up by his after school care in a van.

  all the kids who get picked up are lined up outside to get ready for their rides.. my son decides it's a good idea to pick up a stick and throw it, hitting a car and putting a small dent in it.

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  daystar

  Well Gary, it's hard to take my son's side if he really did throw a stick, at school, and hit a car. Even if he hadn't hit a car, it's unacceptable in my opinion.

  But I do take your point. My parents never went to bat for me, and I never got in trouble in school but for it was a misunderstanding.

  If I ever get a feel that my son is being targeted, I have his back. But he will not behave unacceptably.
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  30

  There is no reason you ever have to see this baby at all.

  by reneeisorym in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  its a website that is something like "ask a circuit overseer" instead of "dear abby".

  this just one portion just broke my heart.

  it is all pretty sad actually.

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  daystar

  This is pretty much a dead giveaway:

  you should continue to shun your daugher.

  since they don't consider what they do to actually be "shunning", which I always thought odd, since, you know, it is.
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  37

  I just got one of *those* calls from my son's school

  by daystar in

  1. social
  2. family

  *sigh* the joys of parenthood.. i just got a call from my son's school.

  he gets picked up by his after school care in a van.

  all the kids who get picked up are lined up outside to get ready for their rides.. my son decides it's a good idea to pick up a stick and throw it, hitting a car and putting a small dent in it.

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  daystar

  littlerockguy

  I really appreciate that. Thanks.

  And thanks to all for the rest of the opinions and suggestions. It's helpful to get some perspective on it.
• 
  37

  I just got one of *those* calls from my son's school

  by daystar in

  1. social
  2. family

  *sigh* the joys of parenthood.. i just got a call from my son's school.

  he gets picked up by his after school care in a van.

  all the kids who get picked up are lined up outside to get ready for their rides.. my son decides it's a good idea to pick up a stick and throw it, hitting a car and putting a small dent in it.

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  daystar

  Oh, forgot to mention that if the car is out there tomorrow, they are going to have him deliver the apology letter himself to the mom and say he is sorry for what he's done.

  I noted that the person calling me from the school was very, very timid in speaking with me about it.
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  37

  I just got one of *those* calls from my son's school

  by daystar in

  1. social
  2. family

  *sigh* the joys of parenthood.. i just got a call from my son's school.

  he gets picked up by his after school care in a van.

  all the kids who get picked up are lined up outside to get ready for their rides.. my son decides it's a good idea to pick up a stick and throw it, hitting a car and putting a small dent in it.

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  daystar

  When he was only two years, he threw one of his toys in his room and shattered his bedroom window...

  hmm... ... ... Perhaps it's time I enrolled him in baseball?
• 
  37

  I just got one of *those* calls from my son's school

  by daystar in

  1. social
  2. family

  *sigh* the joys of parenthood.. i just got a call from my son's school.

  he gets picked up by his after school care in a van.

  all the kids who get picked up are lined up outside to get ready for their rides.. my son decides it's a good idea to pick up a stick and throw it, hitting a car and putting a small dent in it.

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  daystar

  He's five years old.

  I just don't understand the reason for the behavior. He's a nice kid. He shares. He doesn't pick fights. He doesn't normally throw tantrums. But he is a bit energetic.

  And... karma... well, I don't "believe" in karma. But if I did, it would still confuse me. I was a very well-behaved student. I never, ever got into trouble. And when I did, in later years, is was largely due to social ineptitude and/or misunderstanding. (I once had in-school suspension because two bullies tried to gang up on me and I dared to put my hands up to protect my face. The teacher said he only saw that I had my hands up.)

  But largely, I think karma to be one of those "feel-good" philosophies, just to try to reason why bad things happen to otherwise good people. *roll eyes* I suppose I'm paying karma back from a previous life then. (I know, don't poke the tetrapods. )

  Swamboozled, thank you for the suggestion. It gives me some ideas.
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  37

  I just got one of *those* calls from my son's school

  by daystar in

  1. social
  2. family

  *sigh* the joys of parenthood.. i just got a call from my son's school.

  he gets picked up by his after school care in a van.

  all the kids who get picked up are lined up outside to get ready for their rides.. my son decides it's a good idea to pick up a stick and throw it, hitting a car and putting a small dent in it.

  1. 
  2. 
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• 

  daystar

  *sigh* The joys of parenthood.

  I just got a call from my son's school. He gets picked up by his after school care in a van. All the kids who get picked up are lined up outside to get ready for their rides.

  My son decides it's a good idea to pick up a stick and throw it, hitting a car and putting a small dent in it.

  Luckily, the lady in the car doesn't make a big deal of it and didn't say she is going to file a claim. (I am guessing it wasn't a Mercedez or BMW then.) But I just can't believe he did this! I'm fairly certain that he didn't mean to hit the car. But I have no idea what makes him think it's okay to throw a stick like that. *frustration*

  My old JW upbringing is trying to make me get very mad about this and just... I don't know. The school is going to have him sit out of recess tomorrow and write an apology. I told them I didn't think that was enough, so they're going to have him sit out Friday as well and write why doing such a thing is wrong.

  Suggestions? I am thinking I'm going to ground him from some things he likes to do for a few days. But I also need him to understand why it's not okay to do things like that. I don't want to go overboard with it either. Perhaps he is confined to his room tonight as well as grounded from the computer for a few days? Is that too much? Not enough?
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  17

  Is there any Hope?

  by Agnostic Front in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  hi guys, i'm hoping that you may be able to answer a question for me as you seem to have a pretty broad range of experience with the jws, about a year ago i met the most fantastic woman i've ever met, we 'clicked' straight away went on a few dates, held hands, cuddled in country pubs but i never got more than a peck on the lips when we said goodbye.

  she soon informed me that she was a jw, i didn't really know anything about them except for when they knock on my door on a saturday, so i said ok, we'll deal with it.

  she's adamant that we can't be together unless i'm a jw too, i know that this doesn't have to be the case but it's her decision.

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  daystar

  You already know what you should do.

  She can't be with you unless you convert. What this means is that she is asking you to suspend your critical thinking skills, your individuality, and submit to the authority of a group of men in Brooklyn, NY who will seek to, through their publications, control every aspect of your life that they can.

  Start here:

  http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/32/default.ashx

  and then go on to read some of the experiences of some of the people here. These are not isolated events. The Witness religion expects complete and total submission, heart, mind, body and soul, and the sacrifice of your "independent thought". They actually consider "independent thinking" to be a sin! And we're not talking rebelliousness here. If you honestly question deeply any of their oft changing teachings, you can be "accused" of independent thought and apostacy, and be shunned by any of your Witness friends and family. This means they will pretend not to know you if they see you in the grocery store, or will actually scowl at you as if you disgust them.

  I say run for the hills friend.
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  33

  Elder Scrolls Oblivion - Role Playing Games - Advice

  by Crumpet in

  1. social
  2. entertainment

  does anyone else play role playing games on the pc?

  reason i ask is i want to play on my laptop (usually use playstation and xbox but they will be out of bounds over christmas) but am not sure what sort of controller i need as it has been that long since i used the pc for gaming?

  any ideas?

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  daystar

  Neverwinter Nights I was nowhere near the game the Elder Scrolls games have been. But it's still a classic, the first version being an old AOL multiplayer back before AOL even offered any form of internet access. Fun times.

  Neverwinter Nights II might be another story though - http://www.atari.com/nwn2/US/index.php