This is one reason I'm glad I did not have children as a witness. But my love for them might have caused me to leave the borg sooner as I saw their beautiful lives so stifled.
Posts by anewme
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10Witness youths - born into a lifetime of service
by truthseeker intake a typical hardline witness family.. .
one day, they decide they want kids.. .
they already have in mind what their chilren should do when they leave school.
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Who Do You Miss in The Troof?
by anewme ini am out now four years.
i have not had contact with anybody in the troof except my ex in that time.
he kindly was emailing me and even had me over to collect my personal baby pictures and those of my parents who are both dead.
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anewme
I am out now four years. I have not had contact with anybody in the troof except my ex in that time. He kindly was emailing me and even had me over to collect my personal baby pictures and those of my parents who are both dead. He emailed me some pictures and news of the nieces and nephews we share (eleven of them all in the troof)
His emails stopped the day before I married again.
I am happy now. It is just my new husband and I up here in a remote canyon. No hassles, no meetings. But every now and then I get a "pain" of heart, a twinge of intense sadness when I think of those beautiful children I will never see again.
Also my ex. He was a good man who really loves the troof..............more than he did me.
Also my dear friend Kerstin. Funny I've been thinking of her so strongly. I wrote her when I first got Dfd. I know her heart goes out to me. I know she misses me too. She has no way to get a hold of me if she did want to comfort me.
I think I'll write to her and let her know I love her.
As much as I try to move forward, I will never forget the ones I loved I have left behind. -
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Which meetings did you hate the most?
by JH inout of the 5 weekly meetings, here are the ones i hated the most.. in order.
1. theocratic ministry school ( i hated speaking in public) got me so nervous.. 2. service meeting ( too much crap and statistics and presentations).
3. the book study ( just a waist of time ).
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anewme
We had the book study on Thursday nights at our home for 15 years. Also the Saturday FS for 15 years off and on. I had to work so hard to clean and mow lawns to get ready for the group. It was hard work. But I did it for Jehovah and for the friends. I tried to make it fun and have lots of treats afterwards. We had lots of animals who would come out and entertain and I even put on parties with skits the children had rehearsed, costumes and all. There were some very good times. The Saturday Field Service was being moved to the hall in one home after the other until I learned our family was hosting the only home Book study. Fewer and fewer were showing up at our home, prefering to go to the hall where there were more friends to work with in the service. I got tired and asked my husband to move the bookstudy to another home and also meet for weekend service at the hall like the other families were doing. He thought this was a weakness and stood firm for another year while I went under (probably a nervous breakdown of sorts).
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Nun confronts Hanks over 'Da Vinci Code'
by William Penwell inread this today on cnn.
the other night there was some catholic scholar referring to the book as being fiction.
i was confused as to whether he was referring to the "da vinci code" or the "bible"?
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anewme
I respect her for standing up for her beloved Jesus' reputation. If this was my loved one and I felt someone was besmurching his name and damaging his reputation with a lie I would hope I would have the guts to protest also. The fact she was alone in doing so surprises me. I have run into people who believe this theory. I can't say I have let them talk too long. I always cut them off like they are crazy. I ask myself why they want to believe it so much. I guess they are trying to make him appear more normal and manly. It also makes a statement against forced celibacy. But is it my responsibility to defend Jesus anymore? I dont think so.
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Revelation of self
by Sparkplug ini noticed via a friend with no reserve that i have come across harshly to some women.
not as harsh as it would be noticeable to someone on an internet board who does not know me could notice, but....to those who know me outside of the board, i have spoken as sharply as i can get at times.
i want to take this post to apologize.
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anewme
This forum is a real opportunity to express our true selves, our outraged selves and our apologetic selves. Its like real life, maybe even better in a way! Through this media we can expand and contract as we grow toward our mature selves.
I think apologies are a wonderful way to wipe the slate clean and start over anew!
They clear the air for more heartfelt communication.
Hang in there sis! -
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what songs do you want played at your funeral?
by candidlynuts inyeah its morbid... but since we're not gonna live forever like we thought we might the first half or so of our lives, we're obviously gonna die someday.. and i dont want " keep your eyes on the prize " played at my funeral.. (keeping in mind that theres no one thats gonna claim my body to bury it anyway when the time comes).
i want " if you could read my mind" by gordon lightfoot.
" carry on my wayward son" by (kansas?
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anewme
You guys just crack me up!!!!!
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That Voice...My Story
by Confession inwhy doesnt he just talk to me later?
i dont really talk about this much, but i just dont get it.
he seems confident that eventually ill understand him.
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anewme
That was a very good story. Thankyou sincerely.
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Do JWs give you the creeps?
by sonnyboy ini'm not sure if anyone else has experienced this, but i've recently begun to get the willies when i'm around an active jehovah's witness.
this didn't happen until after i started posting here.. when i stop by my parents' house on a saturday morning and the witnoids show up, i get a sinking feeling in my stomach....a mix between sickness, fear, and anger.
i used to try and put on a happy face and be sociable when they came in, but now i just wave goodbye and as i'm walking out.
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anewme
Atta boy Sonnyboy! What you need to do to move on is to vent your feelings! Express your outrage!
Put words forth that explain your emotions!
Pretend you are talking to a visiting couple of witnesses. They are being their usual proud (Ive got all the truth on my side and Jehovah and Jesus too) selves.
Pretend instead of fleeing the house, that you actually stop and face them and tell them at least three reasons why
you believe they are promoting a cult,
you think their shunning is unduly cruel
why you would never go back to their weird organization.
I think the clearer you can be about your grievances the more prepared you will feel when you next are in their presence.
Write down some words. Or express yourself here. Write a letter to a creepy person here. It may do some good to alleviate your fears by putting definite words to them. -
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Dreams Reveal Alot!
by anewme inmy dreams have always been pretty transparent.
most of my dreams in my lifetime have been awful scary ones of being chased in the night and jumping over backyard fences and then flying off to safety.
my childhood was awful and scary and lonely.
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anewme
Yeah, when I was growing up my dreams were all about escaping our house. I had recurrent nightmares of my mother and trying to escape a dark house in the night.
I took it as my brain trying to tell me that he has moved on now.
In fact his emails to me did stop this May.
The fact that I had a voice to speak up and defend myself was amazing!
It is clearly a sign of a return to health.
I am well and happy once again.
I really do attribute my return to sanity and happiness in part to this forum.
Is it possible this forum is from God????? -
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Dreams Reveal Alot!
by anewme inmy dreams have always been pretty transparent.
most of my dreams in my lifetime have been awful scary ones of being chased in the night and jumping over backyard fences and then flying off to safety.
my childhood was awful and scary and lonely.
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anewme
My dreams have always been pretty transparent. Most of my dreams in my lifetime have been awful scary ones of being chased in the night and jumping over backyard fences and then flying off to safety.
My childhood was awful and scary and lonely.
My first marriage was awful and scary and lonely.
My Dfing was awful scary and lonely.
My dreams have been only terrifying my whole life.
Ok. One dream was good. I remember flying (using only my arms) to Los Angeles....ah lovely.
This is why I am writing..
For the last two nights my dreams have changed DRAMATICALLY!!!!!
I was the SUPERWOMAN OF MY OWN DREAMS!!! I was screaming at bad people to get away from me. I physically pushed them back, threatening them with a lawsuit! Screaming I will hurt them bad if they come any nearer to me. Last night I rescued my dogs from bad people and a small child. I screamed out accusations at the bad people. Told them this was not right and yelled at everyone who could hear how outraged I was.
I was soooo mad! I was ready to fight!!!
This is incredible!!! I am such a wooos! My whole life has been DOMINATED by awful people. I have never fought back. I have never been able to verbalize my feelings BEFORE FINDING THIS FORUM.
DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT I AM SAYING? THIS FORUM IS HELPING ME IN AN INCREDIBLE WAY!!! I AM HEALING PSYCHOLOGICALLY!!!! I AM FINDING A VOICE TO DEFEND MYSELF. THE LIST IS LONG OF THE SILENT ABUSE I HAVE TAKEN MY WHOLE LIFE. I TRIED TO BE A GOOD GIRL AND TAKE IT. I THOUGHT THERE WAS SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME.
WOW! I may be able to tell my whole story soon and post my real picture.
THANK YOU ALL FOR BEING HERE!!
Love,
Anewme