Ditto to Willow's comments. I feel exactly the same way.
HiddenQuestioner
JoinedPosts by HiddenQuestioner
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36
What made you lose your joy in serving Jehovah?
by JH inwe all started off as happy witnesses, except for those dragged into this religion by force as kids.. in my case, i found that there were way too many meetings.
then seeing the new system being constantly pushed back, and finally when i saw a lack of true love in the congregation.
and when they hinted that probably there wouldn't be any sex and marriage for the resurrected ones.
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Is there any way I can just cream skim the Truth????
by HiddenQuestioner ini have been lurking for some time and only recently started to post if you have seen my posts, i have always represented myself as a loyal jw and one who is planning to stay in however, lately my faith and commitment as a jw has been tested and, without going into details, i am having problems of faith and life that i could really use some help on.
if so, you might ask, why dont i just leave?
well, i have a wife that is a very devout jw and she would be crushed and very upset if i quit she believes it all 100% and lives to worship the borg in fact, she would be very upset if she even knew i was visiting this site.
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HiddenQuestioner
Thank you so much for all the responses. Keep it coming!!! Some of this was very amusing - the way things were said - and I need to see some amusement in all of this or I'll go crazy. So, thanks for that also.
Also, I think I may have hit some nerves, which is good - I need all the feedback I can get. Like what was said, I've got a lot to digest. So let me sleep on this and I will get back to you.
BTW, I do not have children.
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Is there any way I can just cream skim the Truth????
by HiddenQuestioner ini have been lurking for some time and only recently started to post if you have seen my posts, i have always represented myself as a loyal jw and one who is planning to stay in however, lately my faith and commitment as a jw has been tested and, without going into details, i am having problems of faith and life that i could really use some help on.
if so, you might ask, why dont i just leave?
well, i have a wife that is a very devout jw and she would be crushed and very upset if i quit she believes it all 100% and lives to worship the borg in fact, she would be very upset if she even knew i was visiting this site.
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HiddenQuestioner
I have been lurking for some time and only recently started to post. If you have seen my posts, I have always represented myself as a “loyal” JW and one who is planning to stay in. However, lately my faith and commitment as a JW has been tested and, without going into details, I am having problems of faith and life that I could really use some help on.
If so, you might ask, why don’t I just leave? Well, I have a wife that is a very devout JW and she would be crushed and very upset if I quit – she believes it ALL 100% and lives to worship the Borg. In fact, she would be very upset if she even knew I was visiting this site. So the real choices are: 1.) Stay in the religion and keep my marriage or 2) Leave both the religion and the marriage. (I am afraid that life would be hell if I tried to stay in the marriage but quit being a JW. BTW, this is my 2 nd marriage, not a great one but one that I am willing to try to save. My happy 1 st marriage was lost because she quit both me and the “Truth”)
So, choosing Option 1, the question then becomes: What can constitute me “staying in” as a JW? Given that past serious injustices as a JW justifiably “stumbled me” (these alone caused me to find it necessary to search for answers from JWD), I felt I had no choice but to develop Coping Skills in order to go forward in life. These skills are what I characterize as “cream skimming” i.e. a Plan to get the best out of being a JW, while avoiding the worst. So here’s my Plan. Tell me if this will work….
1. I will attend meetings only for my spiritual nourishment, worship of God and fellowship and not out of guilt, loyalty to an organization or need to learn how to save others. This will mean going to meetings if and when I want to and not because I have to. This will mean only listening (and occasionally commenting, when I feel like it) and not helping out, except with monetary contributions, which I can easily afford.
2. I will enjoy my successful career and its rewards first and any enjoyment as a “brother” second. This will mean that I will plan to get all my self-esteem from my rewarding work. This will mean I will focus fisrt on my family/home, the work and then personal life and then lastly my life of being a “cream skimming” JW.
3. In tandem with the above, I will seek and nurture my good and fun-to-be-with adult professional “worldly” friends to the exclusion of lesser friends I find in the “Truth”
4. Keep an open free mind and look at and participate (for the good) in this very interesting, helpful and often encouraging web site. (BTW, thanks again to all those postings that have helped me “clear” my head on some things.)
5. Now here’s the toughest part. To keep this “show” alive and keep my wife happy and not suspicious, I need to do Field Service. This is the part I detest the most, as I feel like such a hypocrite when I do go out. How about just 3 hours a month and only offer Bible encouragement and harmless invites to the public talk at the local
churchKingdom Hall?6. Be a peace with God and myself by continuing to get closure on the past injustices inflicted on me while I was a devote JW.
Can this work or am I just fooling myself? Realize, Option 2 has some serious downsides also. (And, sorry this is so long)
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Kingdom Hall addresses
by TallTexan inanyone know if there's a quick and easy way to access the addresses of kh's around the u.s. including the cong's that meet there?
didn't know if maybe the society had this info on their website......
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HiddenQuestioner
Surprisingly, if you can get your hands on a Garmin GPS unit you will find in the mapping software under Churches the location, address and telephone number for all the Kingdom Halls in the U.S.
Hope this helps.
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HiddenQuestioner
Count me as active. I attend most meetings, comment and get in about 3 hours a month in field service. For me the downside of leaving is greater then the upside and besides I consider myself a spiritual person who wants to learn the Bible and worships God. I do believe that, the Wachtower Bible & Tract Society notwithstanding, the Truth is the closest thing to the truth. I believe that God does have a purpose for man, that he is loving, that he reads the heart and thus all God fearing honest hearted good people have a chance and hope not just JWs! I come to this forum to receive more information to supplement the literature and meetings from the GB so as to enable a full, balanced and complete exposure to all that is JW. I do this secretly, as I am fully aware that the dogma condemns looking at this site but I have a free mind. The only way to help from within is to know the issues.
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Were you persecuted while in the WTS?
by greendawn induring your stint in the wts were there any jws that would regularly harass and persecute you because of jealousy or sheer malice rather than due to any "apopstate ideas?
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HiddenQuestioner
Funny, I was always taught that persuecution was going to come from the world. So I was always on guard watching for it from sources at both school or work. Unfortunately this caused me to let my guard down with those in "the Truth". Over time no persecution came from the world but instead my JW wife (that I loved very much) turned on me and, with the truth as her "tool", slandered my name, took off with $10s of thousands in real estate equity that we had built up (this was going to be our retirement nest egg) and left me bitter and alone. Also, funny was the fact that it was only my "worldly" friends that supported me and helped me through this very difficult time in my life. I have since then rebuilt my life.
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what would happen if you got a divorce and told the elders nothing...
by ?me? inwhat would/could happen if you and your wife decided that you needed to divorce?
lets say one of us screwed up and cheated, how do you think it would go over if you stonewalled the elders when they tried to get some info?
just told them "it is personal" or just told them that there was grounds to divorce ( even if you did not give any more info).
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HiddenQuestioner
RE: "They will try and find out what has happened and why the divorce."
Allow me to tell my story. My ex-wife accused me of unfaithfulness, hauled me before the elders and played a sick game with my underwear to "prove" my unfaithfulness! - all this to get her hands on 10s of thousands of dollars in real estate equity. Which, by the way, she got. (It was a great con. More on that in a future posting.) Anyway, her act did not work and we got an "unscriptual divorce". However, later I found out she was unfaithful to me. I only found this out after the divorce and after I had relocated to another city hundreds of miles away because of a great job offer that I accepted. Funny thing was once I got to the new city I was welcomed with open JW arms and gained new friends. Even though I knew I was free, I choose not to go through the pain and trouble of having to prove it even though the divorce city had sent a letter to the new city saying that I was unscriptually divorced. I just desided to wait and see what might happen in the new city. Funny thing happened nothing! I was in my early 40s, a healthy semi-attractive man with money and a good job/profession and I wondered to myself why does'nt anyone care about the fact that I could have abandoned a wife and family in the divorce city. I was so shocked that no one might care about this by asking, but no one did and was shocked by this lack of concern over what might have been an innocent victim back in the divorced city. Time went on, I openly dated and no one challenged me. I gained back my self respect and married (not in a KH). Go figure.
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JV's super fantastic Oct 1st education article review!!!!!! (LONG!!)
by JV inwhere to start?
first off i want to say that i actually took notes with my really cool 4 colour pen, and i colour coded my comments accordingly.
green = vomit inducing, red = furious, blue = makes me sad, and black = makes me want to die, lets just say that my article was really green .
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HiddenQuestioner
This posting was placed earlier in the wrong forum. This is the correct forum. So, sorry if I appear to be repeating myself. Anyway, here I go again......
First, let me announce that this is my first posting to this site. I finally got the courage to comment. I have been watching this site for a while now and this subject is the one that will “bring me out of the closet.” – for I am compelled to comment. Second, though I know many JWs would disagree with me, I do not consider myself apostate nor do I consider looking at and even commenting on this site makes you an apostate. I consider myself a “loyal” JW with a free mind. Throughout my 30+ years as a JW I have managed to lead a balance life. However, I must admit, at times it has been a challenge. (For instance, I attribute my divorce to an ex-JW, that I loved very much, and its resulting years of bitterness, to the conflicts that existed over our religion.) That stated, I must also admit that I do not share the views of many of those disillusioned individuals who use this site to rant, BUT you are entitled to rant.
Rant I must though on the Oct 1 “education” article. My wish in making this posting is that SOMEONE in Brooklyn is watching this discussion on education and will realize the uproar that was destined to happen by publishing such enslaving concepts. I was at the meeting last Sunday and my comments are as follows:
1. Throughout our Sunday discussion, the conductor and commenters continually referred to seniors in high school and collage age young adults as children. How delusional can you get? Putting school age adults in the context of children, not only demeaned these adults, but also allowed older individuals (particularly parents) to think that they are entitled to have some form of authority over the actions and decisions of these young adults. These people are NOT CHIDREN and have to be respected as such. Thank you my parents for allowing me to be a young adult when I was a young adult!
2. No where in our discussion was there any recognition given to what the young adult might want to do with his/her life. It seemed it was all about what the parents, congregation and, in particular, what the Organization wants the person to do with their lives. This form of enslavement does not and NEVER will work. The attributes, desires and interests of the expanding mind of the young adult must not only be acknowledge it must be appreciated and the youth’s healthy BENIFICIAL desires must be encouraged. The said, the option of full time service or other theocratic endeavors can and should be one of the many options. But, if ones heart is not in it that same person should not be treated as less of a person for choosing a way of life that includes BOTH worship of his/her god AND a rewarding productive life working in a satisfying career that enriches the life of all those that come in contact with that happy person.
There, my rant is over and I feel better now.
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Jan 1st WT: Reaching out, Higher Education and Providing for one's needs
by truthseeker inwell, as a nice start to the new year, the jan 1st watchtower article, "how firm is your trust in god" blasts those who live comfortable lives, those who don't reach out, and those who pursue higher education.. definitely, they are taking a harsher stand, having completely painted themselves into a corner.. i highlighted the interesting comments.
i did not include all the text for each paragraph, just the main points.. .
1 a young man wanted to be more useful to the congregation.
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HiddenQuestioner
Whoops, my mistake. I posted my Oct 1st WT posting in the wrong forum. I meant to put my mesaage in the forum on the Oct 1st WT forum. I told you this was my first time. I will repost where my message belonged. Sorry about that
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Jan 1st WT: Reaching out, Higher Education and Providing for one's needs
by truthseeker inwell, as a nice start to the new year, the jan 1st watchtower article, "how firm is your trust in god" blasts those who live comfortable lives, those who don't reach out, and those who pursue higher education.. definitely, they are taking a harsher stand, having completely painted themselves into a corner.. i highlighted the interesting comments.
i did not include all the text for each paragraph, just the main points.. .
1 a young man wanted to be more useful to the congregation.
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HiddenQuestioner
First, let me announce that this is my first posting to this site. I finally got the courage to comment. I have been watching this site for a while now and this subject is the one that will “bring me out of the closet.” – for I am compelled to comment. Second, though I know many JWs would disagree with me, I do not consider myself apostate nor do I consider looking at and even commenting on this site makes you an apostate. I consider myself a “loyal” JW with a free mind. Throughout my 30+ years as a JW I have managed to lead a balance life. However, I must admit, at times it has been a challenge. (For instance, I attribute my divorce to an ex-JW, that I loved very much, and its resulting years of bitterness, to the conflicts that existed over our religion.) That stated, I must also admit that I do not share the views of many of those disillusioned individuals who use this site to rant, BUT you are entitled to rant.
Rant I must though on the Oct 1 “education” article. My wish in making this posting is that SOMEONE in Brooklyn is watching this discussion on education and will realize the uproar that was destined to happen by publishing such enslaving concepts. I was at the meeting last Sunday and my comments are as follows:
1. Throughout our Sunday discussion, the conductor and commenters continually referred to seniors in high school and collage age young adults as children. How delusional can you get? Putting school age adults in the context of children, not only demeaned these adults, but also allowed older individuals (particularly parents) to think that they are entitled to have some form of authority over the actions and decisions of these young adults. These people are NOT CHIDREN and have to be respected as such. Thank you my parents for allowing me to be a young adult when I was a young adult!
2. No where in our discussion was there any recognition given to what the young adult might want to do with his/her life. It seemed it was all about what the parents, congregation and, in particular, what the Organization wants the person to do with their lives. This form of enslavement does not and NEVER will work. The attributes, desires and interests of the expanding mind of the young adult must not only be acknowledge it must be appreciated and the youth’s healthy BENIFICIAL desires must be encouraged. The said, the option of full time service or other theocratic endeavors can and should be one of the many options. But, if ones heart is not in it that same person should not be treated as less of a person for choosing a way of life that includes BOTH worship of his/her god AND a rewarding productive life working in a satisfying career that enriches the life of all those that come in contact with that happy person.
There, my rant is over and I feel better now.