No..he says.."listen to me." Wow...umm...there's an insight.
Omigod, I can see I'm gonna like your style, Naeblis.
COMF
Posts by COMF
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27Why? I have to ask...
by AGuest inmay you all have peace!.
why is it that when someone knocked on your door and said, "hey, we have the 'truth', and some of us are 'anointed'" and yet, could not prove that truth... nor even explain that anointing... you believed?.
yet, when someone who makes that claim has absolutely no problem explaining it to you and telling you of it... blow by blow... you do not believe?.
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42
ExJW's Make Better Lovers?
by COMF ini don't mean in general, i mean for exjw's... is there a noticable advantage to pairing with someone with the same background?
i'd like to read your thoughts and experiences on this subject.. i've been romantically involved few times, since "the light got brighter" for me about the organization, with people who didn't know anything about jw's before meeting me.
one of them viewed my exjw activity as a bit obsessive but okay as long as she got to obsess on her favorite obesssions, too.
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COMF
Thank you, MD! This topic has naturally been in my thoughts a lot here lately, because my former live-in and I have gone our separate ways (it was an amicable split, by the way), and I'm considering my options. Behavior toward the opposite sex that would have been deceitful before is now not only legitimate, but imperative if I want female company on my Saturday nights (or any other time). As with most everything I run across that is JW-related, I brought it up here to get a variety of comments from others in order to get a well-rounded perspective from their views and experiences.
In retrospect, I guess it looks like I'm sending out a mating call to the ladies on the board, announcing my availability. That was not my intention (in spite of the joking that went on in that vein) and I apologize if anybody got that impression. Maybe Vennie was right that it should have been in the dating forum. That didn't occur to me, since I've never been in the dating forum before (I usually only read this one).
I will submit, too, that I believe the situation is different for women than for men. You may have been minding your own business, but apparently Papa Dark was "looking." Even in the post-90's, after women supposedly learned that it's okay to be forward with a guy they're interested in, my observation is that it's still the guys doing the bulk of the pursuing. Know how many times I've asked somebody out? Possibly hundreds. Know how many times I've been asked out (or its functional equivalent)? Three. If a man sits and waits for it to come to him, he may be sitting a very long time.
And I know, that isn't what you were talking about. You mean to just let things happen as they will without thinking and worrying about it. So it shall be, ma'am, so it shall be. But, like getting a date, I wasn't going to get everybody's comments on this if I didn't bring it up myself. :)
Thanks!
COMFCowboy: Oops! Sorry for the misread. Don't forget to let me know when you're coming to big D for a visit.
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42
ExJW's Make Better Lovers?
by COMF ini don't mean in general, i mean for exjw's... is there a noticable advantage to pairing with someone with the same background?
i'd like to read your thoughts and experiences on this subject.. i've been romantically involved few times, since "the light got brighter" for me about the organization, with people who didn't know anything about jw's before meeting me.
one of them viewed my exjw activity as a bit obsessive but okay as long as she got to obsess on her favorite obesssions, too.
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COMF
VeniceIT:
Ummm Comf is this a personal???? Maybe this should be in the Dating forum!!!Actually, it is personal in a way, Vennie. I had it rather pointedly brought to my attention that these are the kinds of things that make up a normal relationship: going shopping together, attending concerts and other entertainment events together, spontaneously taking off for a weekend out of town together, popping over to each other's houses on the spur of the moment, renting a movie for a Saturday evening... these kinds of things require that your lover live in the same town, or close by. It started me to thinking: while I'm sure Dallas has its fair share of eligible ladies, I don't recall ever seeing any exJW women from here.
JanH:
Been in the chat room again, old mate?Who... me?
Prisca:
If you happen to mention you used to be a JW, you get this look like you've got 3 heads or something!You know what I think is even worse? The feigned interest. You start off explaining something, and they have that focused, attentive look that says, "Yes, go on, I'm listening," and gradually you see it fade at the corners and their eyes glaze over and begin to roam around the room. If the topic is particularly impenetrable, they may even interrupt you to start talking about something totally unrelated.
peaceloveharmony:
if/when i ever hook up with an xjw, i'll be sure to send you a full report with picsHey, why postpone a good thing? Send the report when there's something to report, but you can send the pics on now.
orbison:
well comf if your ever in vancouver, give me a call and we will seeDuly noted and filed for reference, ma'amzelle! And if you want to shoot me a pic or two, my email icon's over there to the left.
Simon:
I am seriously dead when Angharad reads this...Yeah, Simon, but I get the idea that you enjoy living dangerously. :)
wasasister:
maybe you'll get a few more before this thread runs out.Does this mean you'll be posting again, sis?
bboyneko
Yeah, I was with an x-jw for a short while and damn it was HOT.I have yet to experience the passion of a lady ex, but they sure talk a good show. Check out the chatroom here sometime!
...to be with someone that has just enough in common with you that you are good friends but enough vastly different than you that your thoughts and beleifs are constantly put into doubt
Yep. One of my favorite poetic passages is this, from Kahlil Gibran's The Prophet:Let there be spaces in your togetherness,
And let the winds of the heavens dance between you.
Love one another but make not a bond of love:
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Fill each other's cup but drink not from one cup.
Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf.
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone,
Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.
Give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping.
For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.
And stand together, yet not too near together:
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other's shadow.mommy:
Congrats to you single people out there Have a blast and Do not settleWell, okay... if you insist!
Seeker:
I worry about obsessing too much about exJW stuff... I don't want to fall into the pattern where my whole life revolves around the exJW lifestyleI used to worry about this, but I've made my peace with it. I'm happy doing what I do. The level of involvement here goes up and down; like you, I've left for periods of time more than once. I don't feel that it's controlling me; nor is it holding me back from living an active and rewarding life completely separate from JW/exJW issues.
Cowboy
I guess we think we're supposed to be miserableIt isn't misery to me, Cowboy! Then again, I have to stop and remember, when I say "it isn't misery to me," that I haven't lost any family members to the org like many have.
dannyboy:
who might then (god forbid) GO BACK to the dubs?God forbid that I should be so imperceptive as to take up with a woman with that potential inside her.
BoozeRunner:
Actually, I feel that the relationships I have had since my exit have been pretty damn goodMine have had their good points, and all produced memories that I'll treasure. They ultimately ended because whatever was wrong overrode what was right. That can happen whether it be exJWs or "worldly people," as you pointed out.
circe
If he wasn't an ex-JW, I would first have had to explain what a car group was, blah, blah blah.Nickie was always willing to sit and listen. I would burst out laughing at something on the forum, and she's ask what it was, and then I'd have to go through a five-minute explanation just to enable her to see the joke. Of course, by then it wasn't funny anyway, but she'd laugh good-naturedly anyway, bless her heart.
Englishman
Well, we just fell on each other... and we were both happy to smile across a room at each other when we both had new partners.Ah, those wonderful moments when life is actually lived for the present instead of for some future time!
Maximus:
"Save the Tiger" Unless you already remember it.I do. But I'll rent it again on your recommendation. Jack Lemmon was a favorite of mine.
The new post-JW dimension is a total intimacy, with full revelation of self, in which I understand and am completely understood.
It takes a special kind of partner to be able to do that as a team, Max. You're in an enviable position (heh, heh). I congratulate you on having found and kept your compatible mate!
Billygoat:
I'd love to meet other xJW in the DFW metro area, although I have no desire to date. Nothing personal...I'm already blessed with a fantastic guy in my life! Anyone up for a moment at Starbucks?Yeah, buddy, we can do that! I know I can round up SixOfNine; I also know that there are a couple more Dallasites who post on here, but I can't recall who they are because they aren't very active. Maybe they'll see and we can arrange an outing.
thinker
As far as the question "Do ex-JWs make better lovers?" I must say "Yes..Oh yeeessss.. oh my god yesssssssss!!!"Hmm... sex so good, even the neighbors had a cigarette afterward? :)
Hang in there and don't worry. I always seemed to meet women when I wasn't really trying.
Thanks for the encourging words, thinker. Actually, meeting women has never been a problem... it's meeting someone with the qualities I'd like my partner to have (and who's available, and who thinks I have the qualities she wants in a partner) that seems to be difficult.
teejay
I could be wrong, but I think that to be truly at one with another, she'd almost have to know quite a bit about the religion.I'm inclined to agree. While my "worldly person" relationships were enjoyable and rewarding, there was this feeling that they would never be able to understand and identify with that part of my life. As Wasasister said to me recently, it would be like trying to understand and identify with the feelings of a holocaust survivor.
So, everybody... ugh, the awful delimma: do I look for an exJW lady in a distant location and try to make a long-distance relationship work? (warning buzzer rings insistently) Or, do I look for a woman with all that self-esteem/honesty/love-of-life stuff, who nevertheless will never understand the JW aspect of my life?
I dunno. Maybe both, huh? Maybe it'll work itself out. Maybe I worry too much. Maybe it's too late for me to be up still fooling with this. Good night, everyone.
COMF
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42
ExJW's Make Better Lovers?
by COMF ini don't mean in general, i mean for exjw's... is there a noticable advantage to pairing with someone with the same background?
i'd like to read your thoughts and experiences on this subject.. i've been romantically involved few times, since "the light got brighter" for me about the organization, with people who didn't know anything about jw's before meeting me.
one of them viewed my exjw activity as a bit obsessive but okay as long as she got to obsess on her favorite obesssions, too.
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COMF
I don't mean in general, I mean for exJW's... is there a noticable advantage to pairing with someone with the same background? I'd like to read your thoughts and experiences on this subject.
I've been romantically involved few times, since "the light got brighter" for me about the organization, with people who didn't know anything about JW's before meeting me. One of them viewed my exJW activity as a bit obsessive but okay as long as she got to obsess on her favorite obesssions, too. Another eyed me warily and mused about emotional baggage. A third didn't even give it any thought; she wasn't interested in talking about it; it was boring (let's go shopping!).
I haven't yet had the opportunity to experience involvement with an exJW. Take it as a given that we would still be looking for qualities we want in a partner, i.e., honesty, good self-esteem, zest for life, hot bod, etc.
My interest in and activity with exJWs doesn't show any sign of waning although I've been at it for about five years now. I wonder if it wouldn't be better to be involved with someone who understands immediately what I'm talking about when I mention something from this or one of the other boards; after all, they do receive a significant amount of my attention. Are there disadvantages unique to this kind of pairing, that would make sticking to "worldly people" a better way to go? Or does it just come down to the individual, after all? What do you think? What is your experience?
Singleness is upon me, and Dallas appears to have a dearth of eligible exJW ladies. And my rich daddy doesn't have a faithful servant to send on a caravan back to the old stomping grounds. Here we go again...
COMF
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14
Umm just a favor--sex sins ?'s
by VeniceIT inhi gang!!
i would like to ask a favor.
someone in yahoo chat wants a rundown of all the wts sex sins.
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COMF
Manipulation of gerbils
-> http://www.joecartoon.com/cartoons/microgerbil.html
Unfortunately, Joe seems to have removed the cartoon I had in mind, "GerBill", in which former President Clinton intones solemnly, "Read my lips. I... did not... have sex... with that... gerbil." Meanwhile, deep within his... uh... well, up where the sun don't shine, Bill's gerbil intern has a few ideas of his own...
Oh, well. If gerbil manipulation is the name of the game, MicroGerbil will serve nicely.
COMF
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16
Some Things in Life Are Bad - Monty Python
by LadyBug inand ... always look on the bright side of life.
always look on the bright side of life.
always look on the bright side of life.
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COMF
Excuse my sexual bent, here, but...
with BugEyes finger on the button of course.
Is this a reference to you and BE indulging in a little hanky panky at the keyboard?
Button-oriented COMF
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28
Are You 'Unevenly' Yoked?
by AGuest inmay you all have peace!.
in the minds of many bible scholars (the wtbts 'scholars' as well), the term 'belial' means 'without benefit' or 'good for nothing'.
that is incorrect, however.
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COMF
COMF - you are a stupid man.
Opinions and assholes, Shelby.
You do not 'gain approval' in the manner that you are using.
Oh, but I do; I do. I gain it from the one whose approval counts for everything.
Stop lying to YOURSELF, admit your error... and repent. For my Father shows mercy to whomever HE wishes to show it.
Yes, and it just irritates you no end that he shows it to me over your objections, doesn't it. Poor baby.
COMF
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COMF
Kewl!
I feel 47. It's a mighty fine age to be. I don't believe, right this minute, I'd pick any other for me.
COMF
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28
Are You 'Unevenly' Yoked?
by AGuest inmay you all have peace!.
in the minds of many bible scholars (the wtbts 'scholars' as well), the term 'belial' means 'without benefit' or 'good for nothing'.
that is incorrect, however.
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COMF
you're 'deaf'... and dumb.
Hey, wow, y'all! The Holy Spirit of Jaheshua Michouacan just insulted me! How many of you punk-ass heretic-wannabees can say that, huh? Eat your hearts out, you insignificant scoffers.
Because your 'hearing aid' only gets one station... W-LAKE Gehenna... and therefore can only 'tune in' to 'expressions inspired by demons'.
I hear ya, AGuest, honey! I hear ya!
Careful, Cap'n, 'cause what those speedos are 'revealing' is TRULY... a DISGUSTING 'THING'.
Now, Shelby, hon, I have accepted your fascination and love-hate obsession with me, but I must ask you to keep your sexual fantasizing about me out of the public forum, please. After all, I haven't said anything about all that flesh you cram into your straining Just My Size "Woman-N-Then-Some" panties.
'Small' wonder (pun intended).
Shelby told me to kiss her ass a while back, folks. I told her I would, except, it would take all day and I had stuff I had to get done.
A slave of Christ, who speaks the language of 'truth', something you, of course, could never receive... or comprehend.
"Qua qua qua qua quah quah quow"
Peace... to those of you who 'receive' it... and none to those of you who don't.
Aw, now, Shelby! You sure are talking mean here in front of all these folks, after all those nice things you were saying to me in bed last night.
COMF
"Not unless fired upon, suh... not unless fired upon."
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Are You 'Unevenly' Yoked?
by AGuest inmay you all have peace!.
in the minds of many bible scholars (the wtbts 'scholars' as well), the term 'belial' means 'without benefit' or 'good for nothing'.
that is incorrect, however.
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COMF
You know, in the "Charlie Brown" animated cartoons, whenever a grownup talks it's always the sound of a muted trumpet going "Qua qua qua qua quah quah quow"?
Why is it that Shelby's "words of Jaheshua Michouacan" always have that playing in the background?
COMF
"I'm special... sooooooo special... I gotta have some of your... attenshun... give it to me!"