Boy, this just leaves me speechless! Some people obviously never question their beliefs or heritage!
Have they not seen American History X?
enosant
Un peut de bien ne peut faire de mal - es.67
enosant
JoinedPosts by enosant
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this makes me MAD
by under74 ini came a cross this article....never heard of it before although i know now there was a primetime live that did a story about them.
it's sick to know.
i read more and it made me more angry.. and there are people here in the us that say racism isn't the way it was....idiots.. http://abcnews.go.com/primetime/story?id=1231684&page=1.
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enosant
enosant
Un peut de bien ne peut faire de mal - es.67 -
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enosant
Chinese Sweet & Sour meal for one and The Cube dvd!
Hang on that was 5hrs ago! I'm turning into an insomniac!
enosant
Un peut de bien ne peut faire de mal - es.67 -
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Men and women don't understand eachother
by ballistic in'i'm starting to like you too much... i'm gunna try not to speak or see you for a few days' .
ok, i will post back here any more things i don't understand as time progresses .
and ladies, feel free to post anything you don't understand that men say, i'm sure we will know what is going on (not)!!
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enosant
We all need to feel wanted, desired ... and women particularly so.
I lost the love of my life by a little game like that. I thought she was the one. After 5 years living together we were thinking of having a baby (her idea) and we event went to Oz to spy out the land before we emigrated. Then she said, paraphrasing 'Looks like we are going to settle down. I need a little space to think.'! I was devastated, but I let her go. I thought I was being respectful but wasn't very articulate about how I really felt about her, about us. I was convinced she'd realise what a great thing we had and come back ... Of course, she met some smooth talker some time after and last I heard she's made herself a new life with him.
Now years later, I still can't get her out of my head and heart. I've measured all girls to her since and they've all fallen short! I still regret not going after her as per my own advice above! If I had, I would've known one way or the other, instead of the having feeling that I may never find someone like her again ... Fool!
enosant
Un peut de bien ne peut faire de mal - es.67 -
46
Men and women don't understand eachother
by ballistic in'i'm starting to like you too much... i'm gunna try not to speak or see you for a few days' .
ok, i will post back here any more things i don't understand as time progresses .
and ladies, feel free to post anything you don't understand that men say, i'm sure we will know what is going on (not)!!
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enosant
I here you buddy!
Maybe she's wants some distance to see if the physical part of your relationship is not blinding her (or you both) as to whether you are suited for each other. (Basically I think it would be fair to say that the woman knows more about what's going on in the relationship than the guy, I think.)
Or she may want you to chase after her and not let her take her distance quietly, as if you didn't deserve her. She wants to see how much you want her.
Maybe you could let her know how much you care for her, desire to be with her and how deep your love is for her. And if she still wants a little distance, that's ok too. Its her perogative and you just wanted her to know how you felt.
Caveat: I'm no expert. This is just what I would do in that situation. How you deal with it is your decision.
enosant
Un peut de bien ne peut faire de mal - es.67 -
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Isolated & disconnected once outside
by enosant inis this a common issue for exjws?
or do you find it easy to just get on with it?
having lost all the jw friends, you find that you can't bring yourself to let others get too close, even pushing them away (old habbit dying hard).
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exjdub - you are a healer! Your words helps us to identify at a granular level the root causes of the symptoms we experience.
I think,like me, lots of people become depressed after leaving the Borg. Helping others is one of the many ways of relieving this problem and your experience confirms this.I think it taught us to be selfish and inclusive. So when you leave, you really have to fight the inclination to be internal.
I had no idea how much really helping people would help heal my own heart.
Thank you for sharing your example and your healing words!
enosant
Un peut de bien ne peut faire de mal - es.67 -
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Isolated & disconnected once outside
by enosant inis this a common issue for exjws?
or do you find it easy to just get on with it?
having lost all the jw friends, you find that you can't bring yourself to let others get too close, even pushing them away (old habbit dying hard).
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enosant
lisavegas420 wrote
I still find myself pushing people away when they try to get to close. Even wonderful kind people. It's like I'm afraid that they will change or find out too much about me and stop liking me.
I know she's really trying to be nice. ...but I still feel fearful.
Try not to let your previous automatic response to closeness get in the way of a relationship with someone who might turn out to be just what you've been looking for! She seems to understand you and really like you. If the feeling is mutual and she's a white witch and is not eyeing you out for the sacrificial altar, then I'd say don't move away out of the fear of your past.
enosant Un peut de bien ne peut faire de mal - es.67 -
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Isolated & disconnected once outside
by enosant inis this a common issue for exjws?
or do you find it easy to just get on with it?
having lost all the jw friends, you find that you can't bring yourself to let others get too close, even pushing them away (old habbit dying hard).
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exjdub wrote:
I think the pushing away and the anger is normal when you are completely betrayed. Who, of any of us here, have not experienced a complete tearing out of our hearts?
[..]All of our friendships were completely tied up in the Borg. We were taught to trust with all of our hearts and to not question "authority." This is all part of the journey when you unplug from the Matrix.Your words have shed light on much of my own experience & provided a mirror. I'm sure it's the same with others here too.
It is comfort to know that these feelings, though so deep and personal, are not uniquely possessed. They are the effects of the same cause, irrespective of who experiences them. Much like a hangover or a burst appendix.
Also you introduced terms that I will add to the long list that describes the state we are in on leaving the hive or unplugging: betrayed, a complete tearing out of [the] heart and taught to trust with all of our hearts.
These also explain why I go to pieces when close relationships with girlfriends I've made since leaving end. All the feelings of misplaced trust, betrayal and heart tearing flood back, each time with even greator force because I feel like a complete failure yet again! This ties in well with hamsterbait rubberband comment.Probably means that I invested myself in those relationships completely heart, mind and soul just like I did with the 'Truth'. Living but not learning! This is an approach I need to reassess!
Thank you once again. You have helped me to figure myself out a bit more.
enosant
un peut de bien ne peut faire de mal - es.67 -
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UK & IRELAND MAP
by ballistic ini had an idea that i could build a uk map of everyones location which would show you instantly who is in your area from jwd.. (it might be an idea to do a seperate us one aswell but i'll wait and see if this one takes off first, or if anyone from the us wants to volunteer to do that one).
(and australia but you are all in the same backyard anyway - literally!!!).
anyway, all you have to do is post or email me your username and town and i will draw you on the map above which will change gradually to include everyone!.
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enosant
Thanks Lady Lee,
I thought there might be an updated one. Nevermind.
The UK seems to be letting us down. I'm sure there must be a lot more exJW around here but maybe like me until recently they have no idea that such a forum exists and are stuggling on their own.
I tried starting a thread on www.upmystreet.com but so far it's only attracted comments from others who frankly are just taking the mikey. Nevermind. -
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Isolated & disconnected once outside
by enosant inis this a common issue for exjws?
or do you find it easy to just get on with it?
having lost all the jw friends, you find that you can't bring yourself to let others get too close, even pushing them away (old habbit dying hard).
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enosant
Is this a common issue for exJWs? or do you find it easy to just get on with it?
Having lost all the JW friends, you find that you can't bring yourself to let others get too close, even pushing them away (old habbit dying hard). I find I'm still finding myself doing that now.
Do you find yourself dong that too? Collecting a large number of acquiantances, that you keep a 'safe' distance away, always finding some excuse not to spend time with them?
These words of a song come to mind:
Is there anybody out there who
Is lost and hurt and lonely too
Are they bleeding all your colours into one?
and if you come undone
As if you've been run through
Some catapult it fired you
You wonder if your chance will ever come
Or if you're stuck in square one -
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What Decisions Did You Make Only Because You Were A Witness?
by minimus ini believe that most jws are deep down inside angry over the fact that they went along with the status quo and the majority just to be accepted.
some witnesses would like to have a tattoo, a mustache, a shaved head, a beard, a new red sportscar, etc.
but they don't because they would be viewed as "immature".
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enosant
There seems to be a recurring theme going on here:
Same here man, having lost all the JW friends, you find that you can't bring yourself to let others get too close, even pushing them away (old habbit dying hard). I find I'm still finding myself doing that now. Do you find yourself dong that too? Collecting a large number of acquiantances, that you keep a 'safe' distance away, always finding some excuse not to spend time with them?
I find it so hard to break out of this pattern. I lost so much when I was D'fd I never want to go thru that pain again. It's very, very difficult to get close to someone.
I couldn't handle the pain of all the isolation. No friends. No social life. No girlfriends.
Perhaps we should start a new thread on this topic?
enosant
un peut de bien ne peut faire de mal - es b.67