sammielee,
you said "the thing that turned me off of jws most was their absolute judgement, harshness and predjudice- their view of all or nothing- their shades of black and white."
it is the elders who spend their jw lives teaching these things, both from the platform and off the platform. they do this because it is the "arrangement". they do this because their masters tell them to. they do this because if they don't they will lose their precious position, they will lose their title, and they will be treated like trash just like any other person who is "only a publisher"
the elders are the ones who demand absolute obedience to the borg and whatever bizarre rules they can come up with. the elders are the ones who demand that you iognore scripture and use only the watchtower as their bible. have you ever had a scriptural discussion with someone who has no knowledge of scripture but is convinced he is "appointed by the holy spirit"? have you ever been threatened with death(disfellowshipping) because your conscience, backed by scripture, is not in line with the holy fds and their arrangement? well i have. and then when they are in an enviroment that doesn't call for this kind of bullshit it is the exelders who want to cling to this arrangement by their lame ass claims of repentance. because of their "repantance" we are supposed to "just get over it" well, i am an imperfect man and, i don't intend to "just get over it". i intend to fight this attitude as long as i live. and the elder class can "just get over" that.
and here is little tip for the elders who are still elders, like the man this thread was started for. the next time you are on the platform praying for jehovah's blessing on the pioneers, ministerial servants, elders, special pioneers, circuit overseers, district overseers, branch overseers, bethelites, the fds, and the governing body, throw a little my way and ask for a blessing on those who are "only publishers". it might make it seem as if you feel we are a part of this thing too. and if you are wondering, i actually heard a co ask this blessing from the platform. the jerk actually asked a blessing on himself and couldn't find anyplace in his prayer for me or any other commoner. he is also the one who said that you could find time to go in service more even if you are "only a publisher"
are any of you beginning to get a clue as to where my feelings of hate are coming from? personally i doubt it because you have to listen and consider my words to get a clue and those are just two of the things your masters didn't teach you.
j2s