Posts by skeeter1

29

Help needed with 14 year old teenager who has gang (Krips) ties.....

by skeeter1 in

this is long, sorry.

my 14 year old niece came to visit us this week.

she's being raised by her grandparents (ex-jws) and birth mother (ex-jw).

skeeter1

Thanks everyone for your insights. I live hundreds of miles away. I do believe that that group has coddled this girl more than usual. The result is that she can't leave becuase she has little skills to cope with dailing living. I strongly wonder now if keeping her dependent was a way to ensure that they would never have an empty nest. On one hand, they talk about wanting her to be independent. But, when it was time for her to do anything on her own, including ordering her own food at a restaurant when she was 12 by talking directly with a waitress, she couldn't do it and they did it all for her. When she turned 16, she wasn't asking for a driver's license and they declared that they were not going to push it." She got her driver's license recently, when she was living away from them I beleive. Now, sadly, no on is forcing the issue of birth control with her. They 'leave it up to her' and they 'can't force a 21 year old to go to the doctor.' Then, when they actually discuss birth control, they come up with silly excuses for her not to use it (e.g. it will grow facial hair). Hell, you can't wax off a second child born to an unwed, dependant woman. The general consensus from those adults is that birth control is terrible, makes you sick, gain weight, unnatural, etc. Same thing with holding jobs, it is a necessary evil more than there is actual pleasure from it. It's always "someone's fighting, my boss is a jerk, everyone's an idiot, I never saw daylight when I worked in a factory" mentality as far as work. The result is her. When she actually does get a job, I foresee that she will have alot of problems keeping it or getting along with others. If she ever really grows up, I think she will be pissed of when she realizes what was done to her

I get really frustrated because I am much more goal orientated and derive pleasure from working. That causes me frustration as I try to help them. I hope the grandfather (breadwinner) never dies. Grandma asked if she'd be able to move in with us (we'd take care of her). Taking care of her isn't an issue, but taking care of the entire clan of 6 people who are all highly dependent, would be. We couldn't do it either logistically, financially, or emotionally for very long.

29

Help needed with 14 year old teenager who has gang (Krips) ties.....

by skeeter1 in

this is long, sorry.

my 14 year old niece came to visit us this week.

she's being raised by her grandparents (ex-jws) and birth mother (ex-jw).

skeeter1

We don't give any type of "boy" advice. That goes wrong, real quick. She runs off with them. She picks the same type of guy, the loser that villifies her family but wants to mooch off them as much as possible. The family finally blows up, and she runs off with them. She's been in and out of the swinging door more times than I mentioned.

To build her esteem, relatives near her just pick something to compliment her on. Any type of advice, however carefully worded, and she does the exact opposite.

We've pointed her to local programs and the welfare office has offered too. She hasn't gone. I've quietly offered to pay for her to go to a professional coach or counselor. Nope. I've pointed her to free word processing and spreadsheet classes so she can get on with a temporary secretarial group at the very least. She hasn't done it. I pointed her to basic resumes for high school people. Nope. She puts in applications, and doesn't get called back. I think it's due to her looks and the fact that so many others are looking for work. Honestly, I think as long as relatives pay for her essentials, roof, and food; and she gets enough from Uncle Sam, she is very wiling to just sit on her rear. She has never had a job and just a litte school, and she's almost 21 years old. I think employers have too many others to pick from. She lives near a major city, so there's plenty of jobs. You can feed a girl a fish, and she will never learn to fish until she's hungry.

Skeeter

29

Help needed with 14 year old teenager who has gang (Krips) ties.....

by skeeter1 in

this is long, sorry.

my 14 year old niece came to visit us this week.

she's being raised by her grandparents (ex-jws) and birth mother (ex-jw).

skeeter1

If I remember right, she's told family members that she likes tattoos. But, none of us are going to pay for her to get a tattoo. She doesn't work and has no money, so she can't get one. If she gets a job, I imagine that that might be one of the first things she gets. But, she's always been afraid of needles and pain. So, maybe she could only go through with it if she was high.

I have really lived a sheltered life. Speaking of tattoos, I do have a old lesbian buddy of mine. She's totally into tattoos. Posts pictures of them on her social media. All into young women with tattoos. I didn't realize that it was such a lesbian thing. So, we were talking, and there are special tattoos that people from different groups get. There are lesbian favorites, and gay men favorites. There's even tats for people with AIDS. I would have thought people would not want to advertise that they had AIDS! A red ribbon tattoo would have totally flown under my radar. Now, I'm going to be totally into looking at people's tattoos to see if they have AIDS. I feel like a stranger in a strange world . . . or at least a voyer.

29

Help needed with 14 year old teenager who has gang (Krips) ties.....

by skeeter1 in

this is long, sorry.

my 14 year old niece came to visit us this week.

she's being raised by her grandparents (ex-jws) and birth mother (ex-jw).

skeeter1

It's like the Maury Povich show, and, honestly, I worry about letting our own kids visit too much. She doesn't talk with me on any type of regular basis becuase I'd give her a piece of my mind too quickly. Everything I've begged she do, she does opposite.

I hear from others about her. Good news. She did graduate High School and has, supposedly, gone a quarter at a local college but now isn't in school. She might start back in September. She's supposed to be looking for a job. She's a good looking and smart girl, but sports lip and tongue rings and strangly colored hair. So, she's limited her ability to get a job.

Bad news, shortly after high school got pregnant with a real "winner" of a guy. He's long gone, stiffs her on child support, and the baby is now a toddler. Her second boyfriend had an felony record and was using her house as a hide out until the police picked him up for violating parole. I think the record was armed robbery. When he returned from jail, he wasn't allowed to live at her house. So, she ran away with him from home with the baby to another loser's house. They broke up and she moved back home. She is now hooked up with another winner. His own dad has almost given up on him. Her boyfriends are all carbon copies of each other. No job, car, or prospect. And, she's a good looking girl who is smart. I hope she wises up the closer she gets to 25 years old. I pray she doesn't start stealing from stores and/or get arrested. I super pray she doesn't get pregnant again.

Like Maury Povich, I believe that every person is a good person down inside. But, they have to choose to beleive that they are. Personally, I would love to find a magic solution to help her out. I get so saddened by the life the little kid has to lead. I know the cycle of poverty all too well. It has the entire extended family very sad and depressed. Some family members just don't deal with it at all. I wish I could just wipe the sadness all away and make it better for her and the baby and everyone. But, she has to learn her own lessons. I can't interfere in whatever it is "someone up there in heaven" is trying to teach her. Besides, she doesn't want to take any of my or other family members' advice.

10

Four Jehovah's Witnesses face death penalty - Victim of Pakistan's Blasphemy Law.

by Sol Reform in

four jehovah's witnesses face death penalty - victim of pakistan's blasphemy law.. http://www.charismanews.com/world/44004-popular-tv-show-the-latest-victim-of-pakistan-s-blasphemy-law.

popular tv show the latest victim of pakistan's blasphemy law 10:00am edt 5/28/2014.

world watch monitor film actress veena malik and her husband, assad khattak khan, were charged with blasphemy after a re-enactment of their wedding appeared on "utho jago pakistan.

skeeter1

That's just terrible!

28

Am I a judgmental bastard or just one of the last sane persons on this planet?

by skeeter1 in

so, i happened to see a young lady.

she's about 13 or 14, can't be more than 16 years old.

fresh faced, rosy cheeks, and a little pudgy.

skeeter1

So, I happened to see a young lady. She's about 13 or 14, can't be more than 16 years old. Fresh faced, rosy cheeks, and a little pudgy. Looks like she would still eat kiddie cereals and like to go to Toys R Us. But, wait, she has a bull ring, tattoos of demons, and tongue/cheek piercings. It looked so out of place on her. I mean, if you're going to have a bull ring in your nostrils, then you better look like a muscle bound, testosterone bar bouncer who can kick arse, a heroin addict, or a Hells Angels rider. You can't look like you've never had a cup of straight black coffee. I would have loved to have seen this chicks parents. I mean, why is it that these little ladies want to look like hardened criminals. I don't get why they think looking like they come from the ghetto is all that great. I grew up in the ghetto and did everything I could to lie about where I actually lived and to get out of it. I wasn't trying to look, act, or talk like a gang leader! Maury Povich is not supposed to be a role model show.

10

Is She Going to College?

by OnTheWayOut in

jw
friends

so my wife goes to a high school graduation for a congregation member.

she spends hours at the party, she has cake, she gives a very decent gift.

she brings home leftovers from the party for me and her.

skeeter1

I think she's going to college, otherwise the whole party would have been babbling about her pioneering. LOL.

25

About Human Birth- (Which I've just seen) First Child today

by HowTheBibleWasCreated in

i have seen many witnesses with 4,5,6,7 kids.

no problem with that.

they are mostly loving families but today i experianced the birth of my son.. the emotions of my wife... the pain... the fear... the hope combined with the joy of the birth and seeing my wife reaction when she held the baby was well balanced.. .

skeeter1

Happy Father's and Mother's Day to you and your wife!

30

You Americans are the friendliest people I've met

by not bitter in

jw
friends

........ well at least the ones i encountered on my recent holiday to orlando.

now i know that its a tourist destintion so everyone working in the hotels and parks are on their best behaviour.

but i have been to tourist towns here in the uk and europe but not one is on a par with you guys.. my husband and i haven't stopped talking about to anyone that wants to listen.

skeeter1

As a Southerner, thank you very much for your kind thoughts. I do hope you return to visit Florida. Make sure you see the Florida Keys next time too! You will not be disappointed.

111

CONGREGATION FLEECING RESULTS?

by The Searcher in

how much did your congregation and its bank account get taken for?

share your horror story!.

skeeter1

I don't know the results of my relatives' congregation. But, I do know that their own individual "giving" is down by 90% over this past year or so. And, they have no plans of increasing it. We discussed the several hundred million, plus, the WTS has received from selling properties, and I stated that it's like the Catholic church asking for money, when it doesn't need it. I think one of my relatives is very disgusted at the WTS . . but just not enough to actually leave it.