i am still working on my wife, some progress is being made, but it is slow going.. here is how i plan to reason with her regarding the 9/07 km article on "non-endorsed" methods of study.
feel free to use or adapt yourself, if you are in a similar situation.. .
suppose that one day a stranger calls the house when i am not at home.
jgnat - i love the way you think - when my jw family asks me, if i confirm that they really want to know , then forward I can go.
this entire thread is so helpful- the illustration is bang on- it allows the jws natural defenses to be down before they realize that if THIS make sense, what about its obvious comparison to their belief
i hope this is not stupid question but it struck me talking to a jw friend who was agast that i love celebrating birthdays that as a faithful jew he would have.
or is this a more modern part of jewish tradition?.
from a recent thread i had some good points - notably pauls comment to not judge those that keep "special days" and she was a little taken aback by that although she said that applied to anniversaries and not birthdays.
thank you for the info - did the Jewish people commemorate birthdays at all in Jesus' time- when she finds this out she will come at me with both barrels blazing (kinda like the candles on a b'day cake)
i hope this is not stupid question but it struck me talking to a jw friend who was agast that i love celebrating birthdays that as a faithful jew he would have.
or is this a more modern part of jewish tradition?.
from a recent thread i had some good points - notably pauls comment to not judge those that keep "special days" and she was a little taken aback by that although she said that applied to anniversaries and not birthdays.
i dimly recall something about jade - what was the deal?
i hope this is not stupid question but it struck me talking to a jw friend who was agast that i love celebrating birthdays that as a faithful jew he would have.
or is this a more modern part of jewish tradition?.
from a recent thread i had some good points - notably pauls comment to not judge those that keep "special days" and she was a little taken aback by that although she said that applied to anniversaries and not birthdays.
i hope this is not stupid question but it struck me talking to a jw friend who was agast that I love celebrating birthdays that as a faithful Jew he would have. or is this a more modern part of jewish tradition?
From a recent thread I had some good points - notably Pauls comment to not judge those that keep "special days" and she was a little taken aback by that although she said that applied to Anniversaries and not Birthdays. She was confident that there was jw reasoning on that, but I can't imagine what that is
i got the plans in the works!
i've got a 26er and a half of vodka mixed with fruit punch (no smell on breath or when mixed :d) in my suitcase!!!!
lol!
please let us know how your day goes
i got the plans in the works!
i've got a 26er and a half of vodka mixed with fruit punch (no smell on breath or when mixed :d) in my suitcase!!!!
lol!
there is nothing a jw loves more than a good/bad example of an ex jw. the badder you are, the better an example you make
Ponder this - if you go - and beleive us, they will know you are drunk- you will be exactly as they expect an ex/non jw
Your parents - who it sounds like up to now have been ok with your exit (i assume you are not dfed) will be embarrassed
I have eight siblings - one is a CO, one is a dfed stone head, two are fringe jw and three of us faded and are prettty normal family people (all things considered). When conversations about ex jw's come up - who is the example the congregation clings too - yup - the dfed stone head, not the two business men with four kids or me and my family
think about it- what you want to accomplish, why and what it will mean to you and your parents in five/ten years - or even tomorrow
i would like some advice from any of you that have been there - a good friend of mine had an affair years ago, ended up working with the same guy and is now in love with her boyfriend instead of her husband ( several kids involved) the affair is now not a physical one but there is no doubt they are dating.
i wish i was unaware but i am - she says she has picked her family over the boyfriend but he is like a bumble bee around her- walking her dog past her house etc the boyfriend is older, married and has always been a tomcat - now he is truly in love and will wait.
i have told her it is going to blow up - and i know it is her deal to figure out - but i am from the happily married class and am at a loss.
this is helpful to me - thank you all
my suggestion is that the boyfriend get a divorce if he is unhappy, regardless of what my friend does. but he hasen't over the past twently years of affairs- why would he now (I suggested to my friend it was becasue he is starting to show his almost 50 years, but maybe i am just defending my friend)
my friend defends his right to stay with his wife as she is with her husband
i have questioned what real life with the boyfriend would be like - my friend thinks i am being too hard on him, but this guy has lived a shallow life and now that he is really in love with someone (and she is not shallow) he really is going to push until he has her
but will that be more happily ever after than staying with her husband?
the issues with her husband, besides the fact that he is not her boyfriend is that he is very quiet and in my opinion, doesn't stand up to her at all - ie - the boyfriend showed up at their house last week, at the kids lemonade stand and the husband said nothing. Granted he doesn't know the whole story, but he knows something is up. All he said was "that guy has a lot of nerve, showing up here"....he is totaly willing to trust his wife and i think she is waiting for him to call her on it - but the husband doesn't want to lose his wife
i would like some advice from any of you that have been there - a good friend of mine had an affair years ago, ended up working with the same guy and is now in love with her boyfriend instead of her husband ( several kids involved) the affair is now not a physical one but there is no doubt they are dating.
i wish i was unaware but i am - she says she has picked her family over the boyfriend but he is like a bumble bee around her- walking her dog past her house etc the boyfriend is older, married and has always been a tomcat - now he is truly in love and will wait.
i have told her it is going to blow up - and i know it is her deal to figure out - but i am from the happily married class and am at a loss.
and that is the thing - is it loveless to raise your kids together? is it possible to find a love based on more than romance? can you leave a lover and stay with a spouse and be happy and raise incredible, well adjusted kids????
does commitment make the marriage, or will my friend be a sad old lady?
i would like some advice from any of you that have been there - a good friend of mine had an affair years ago, ended up working with the same guy and is now in love with her boyfriend instead of her husband ( several kids involved) the affair is now not a physical one but there is no doubt they are dating.
i wish i was unaware but i am - she says she has picked her family over the boyfriend but he is like a bumble bee around her- walking her dog past her house etc the boyfriend is older, married and has always been a tomcat - now he is truly in love and will wait.
i have told her it is going to blow up - and i know it is her deal to figure out - but i am from the happily married class and am at a loss.
she is saying that for the kids she is staying with her husband - and that they have an ok life and a chance at a relationship but her comments include that she never really loved her husband - she loves him as the father of her children now.
if he knew, with a certianty, then i think she would leave him - but i also think he is choosing not to leave
maybe the thread should have been is it right to stay together for the sake of the kids
my fears include the boyfriends history - the reality of mixing up a family- and what makes a family anyway??? is it emotion? is it commitment? is it stupidity?
i would like some advice from any of you that have been there - a good friend of mine had an affair years ago, ended up working with the same guy and is now in love with her boyfriend instead of her husband ( several kids involved) the affair is now not a physical one but there is no doubt they are dating.
i wish i was unaware but i am - she says she has picked her family over the boyfriend but he is like a bumble bee around her- walking her dog past her house etc the boyfriend is older, married and has always been a tomcat - now he is truly in love and will wait.
i have told her it is going to blow up - and i know it is her deal to figure out - but i am from the happily married class and am at a loss.
that is the problem -who is staying with who that doesn't want to stay
from her perspective, i think - her husband knows there is a connection but doesn't really know (or has his ears covered and is going lalala so as not to hear),
she claims to love them both- but the romantic love is definitly for the boyfriend
MY vote is for her to tell the boyfriend to "scram" but as they work together and her and hubby are not exactly "happily ever after" at the moment. I am afraid for her - whether or not her and boyfriend are met for each other in the romantic sense, in real life vs reel life there is a ton of stuff here - and i got nothing
i try hard not to be judgemental - but i am trying to understand the situation and how to be a friend to her
