Not knowing seems scary on its own because i suppose its very easy to wake up in the morning and think...hey i've cracked it, i've got all the answers now for the rest of my life.
Posts by KW13
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45My Current Battle
by KW13 inranting individuals need not reply.
i need encouragement and general advice, personal accounts etc.. am i a christian or am i not?
i've come to a point where i'm not sure whether or not i want to believe in anything, at the moment i'm confused as to whether i am a believer or whether i am someone recovering from indoctrination.. i feel that i've not had a 'pure' opportunity to decide if i want to be a believe and although the thought has been in the back of my mind, the conditioning has made me delay it and my current circumstances and poor health are forcing me to face it - i fear facing it will make me worse because its yet another thing i am not really mentally strong enough to deal with.. is it natural i fear what being an atheist means for me.
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45
My Current Battle
by KW13 inranting individuals need not reply.
i need encouragement and general advice, personal accounts etc.. am i a christian or am i not?
i've come to a point where i'm not sure whether or not i want to believe in anything, at the moment i'm confused as to whether i am a believer or whether i am someone recovering from indoctrination.. i feel that i've not had a 'pure' opportunity to decide if i want to be a believe and although the thought has been in the back of my mind, the conditioning has made me delay it and my current circumstances and poor health are forcing me to face it - i fear facing it will make me worse because its yet another thing i am not really mentally strong enough to deal with.. is it natural i fear what being an atheist means for me.
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KW13
I couldnt individually quote each reply because i dont feel i could do them justice but WOW i am blown away by your responses because all of them are very sensible and they seem to be coming from people who are at peace with this issue or they are coming to terms with it. The dependence upon doctrine...the need for it and religion...maybe it is more like the 'need' to smoke rather than a natural thing, you get addicted and you crave it because your body becomes adjusted to having it. Right?
The-Borg, good luck on your journey
As for AA's view on what Atheism can be defined as, that makes a lot of sense to me.
Does Atheism allow for an open-mind? Is it the complete opposite of being a believer really or is it a new journey?
This may seem ignorant but i want to know, its not because of my fear of not being a believer so i can create an excuse.
Thanks folks
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13
Homage to AlmostAtheist
by KW13 inthat's actually a great opportunity to see if you've got real friend material on your hands or not.
one of my very best friends is one i don't agree with on some important topics.
we discuss them until we each understand the other's point of view and can identify the exact point of divergence.
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KW13
That's actually a great opportunity to see if you've got real friend material on your hands or not. One of my very best friends is one I don't agree with on some important topics. We discuss them until we each understand the other's point of view and can identify the exact point of divergence. Then we're done.
Dave
Dave you posted this in another thread and i loved it so much i had to say this in its own topic, i love debates that get right to the point and i miss it when i dont get the opportunity. Its usually done best over a pint of beer or cup of tea in someones lounge until both parties are well and truly happy the other person is wrong but equally right or maybe even some new ground is discovered and even sometimes when someone else changes their mind! Unfortunately since having the baby (diamondblue and sirona have this to look forward to) me and megan mostly blow raspberries at each other and stuff because its all we know.
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45
My Current Battle
by KW13 inranting individuals need not reply.
i need encouragement and general advice, personal accounts etc.. am i a christian or am i not?
i've come to a point where i'm not sure whether or not i want to believe in anything, at the moment i'm confused as to whether i am a believer or whether i am someone recovering from indoctrination.. i feel that i've not had a 'pure' opportunity to decide if i want to be a believe and although the thought has been in the back of my mind, the conditioning has made me delay it and my current circumstances and poor health are forcing me to face it - i fear facing it will make me worse because its yet another thing i am not really mentally strong enough to deal with.. is it natural i fear what being an atheist means for me.
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KW13
Your total and complete honest thoughts on this matter make me envious you can live this way and not be afraid, yet i wonder whether i would be going backwards by leaving religion behind...i hate being in this place.
Were any of you this afraid and did atheism sit better with you than being a believer ever did?
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45
My Current Battle
by KW13 inranting individuals need not reply.
i need encouragement and general advice, personal accounts etc.. am i a christian or am i not?
i've come to a point where i'm not sure whether or not i want to believe in anything, at the moment i'm confused as to whether i am a believer or whether i am someone recovering from indoctrination.. i feel that i've not had a 'pure' opportunity to decide if i want to be a believe and although the thought has been in the back of my mind, the conditioning has made me delay it and my current circumstances and poor health are forcing me to face it - i fear facing it will make me worse because its yet another thing i am not really mentally strong enough to deal with.. is it natural i fear what being an atheist means for me.
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KW13
Firstly thank you all for being so open and honest with me that was appreciated. I am struggling to think straight right now and i do worry that i am an atheist, but why am i worried? what am i scared of and can i help it if i just cant go on believing some of this stuff...crazy isnt it lol. I am so screwed up over it right now.
I keep wondering on whether i should try avoiding the church completely for a while and see how my mind/life goes and try unplugging myself for a bit just to see if i can 'sample' atheism and go cold turkey for a while and get a real balanced view, although i've not really been a church regular for a while now.
My problem at first i thought was just with organized religion so i started picking and choosing bits i liked and i even convinced myself i felt it possible to have a meaningful relationship with God without any form of organization because obviously deep down i had problems with that view, being an ex jw and everything....do i believe in hell? no...a nice reward at the end? of course... is there any such thing as too late? hope not and so on and so forth. Then i grew up a bit and now i think, i am not going to do this for just the reward and i'm not going to do this just because it provides the kind of structure i miss from being a Witness, i want to do it for the sense of fulfillment and true spirituality...wait wheres it gone...aaaaah
I even felt guilty about posting this.
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45
My Current Battle
by KW13 inranting individuals need not reply.
i need encouragement and general advice, personal accounts etc.. am i a christian or am i not?
i've come to a point where i'm not sure whether or not i want to believe in anything, at the moment i'm confused as to whether i am a believer or whether i am someone recovering from indoctrination.. i feel that i've not had a 'pure' opportunity to decide if i want to be a believe and although the thought has been in the back of my mind, the conditioning has made me delay it and my current circumstances and poor health are forcing me to face it - i fear facing it will make me worse because its yet another thing i am not really mentally strong enough to deal with.. is it natural i fear what being an atheist means for me.
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KW13
Ranting individuals need not reply. I need encouragement and general advice, personal accounts etc.
Am i a Christian or am i not? If i am not, what am i?
I've come to a point where i'm not sure whether or not i want to believe in anything, at the moment i'm confused as to whether i am a believer or whether i am someone recovering from indoctrination.
I feel that i've not had a 'pure' opportunity to decide if i want to be a believe and although the thought has been in the back of my mind, the conditioning has made me delay it and my current circumstances and poor health are forcing me to face it - i fear facing it will make me worse because its yet another thing i am not really mentally strong enough to deal with.
Is it natural i fear what being an atheist means for me. I worry that taking that step will somehow take away any pleasure or enjoyment from life and will prevent me coming to feel about God like i used to...the whole thing has started to feel empty. Like talking to a wall sometimes, i feel bad about this because a lot of the times i blame it on myself and think that somehow i am failing but a little voice inside me makes me ask...maybe its the fact God isn't there.
Have i somehow become involved in another 'cult' when i see people being prayed over and see them fall over from 'the holy spirit' and i even hear about what appear to be healings from people i know who don't lie. When i prayed my son was going to a healthy baby because we were told of a risk he'd be down syndrome and he comes out healthy...was this God or chance? When my son was born and he wasn't breathing properly, i thought i was going to lose him then and there and he made it through, was this because i left the room and stood in the hall shouting at God? What about the people who do lose Children?
Its such a big thing to face...should i delay it again, is this what is holding me back? Partly religion was ruined for me by the Witnesses like when people say jehovah i almost cringe because i think of what i left immediately...help...anyone...
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44
Sirona & DB74 are having a Baby!
by diamondblue1974 infor those that know us and that have been following our jwd love story...we cannot contain the news any longer, we have known now for over two weeks but wanted to wait until we had the last early pregnancy scan to confirm everything was ok. .
today we witnessed a miracle in the making and the ultimate in creativity - the scan confirmed a strong heartbeat and considerable growth since the last scan a fortnight ago.. we are going to be parents .
gary (db74) & dawn (sirona).
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KW13
Congratulations Gary, i am really happy for you mate - all the best with lil one
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19
Is there spyware on the Societys CD?
by isnrblog inany thoughts?.
it would be easy to do, but if found out could be very embarrasing!!.
has anyone looked into this?
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KW13
it crossed my mind once then i dismissed it, however i could see them providing individual serial keys to 'register' your watchtower library with feedback software built in saying 'leaving this option allows us to improve watchtower lib by monitoring the software - it'd also let them see who's copying and giving the wbt lib to apostates like us lol.
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88
My daughter is in the hospital .......... it's kind of weird not to pray
by AWAKE&WATCHING inmy daughter shannon is 20 weeks pregnant.
the placenta is pulling loose and she has some bleeding.
the doc seems confidant that both she and the baby will be fine.she found out this week that it is a boy.
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KW13
A relative on Megans side of the family had exactly that, both were fine
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115
My story: "Pop!" goes the Little Circuit Breaker
by TJ - iAmCleared2Land ini guess it's about time i write my story.
i've put this off for a long time... primarily becuase, while i thought my story was bad, i've read so many worse and heart-rending stories here.
i think, though, there is some therapeutic value in 'letting it all out' with others who know what 'it' was like.
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KW13
Never let anyone tell you that you are not a remarkable man, you came through hell. I wish you the best in life and i hope you are happy
and stop saying sorry for making folks cry, honestly - its a disgrace a child/teenager and young adult had to go through all of that, i respect you so much for sharing it - THANK YOU