aquagirl

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Posts by aquagirl

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  13

  Jehovahs Witness Joke

  by BelieverInJesus in

  1. social
  2. humour

  i thought it is ironic that the jehovah's witnesses force their members to go door to door throughout the neighborhoods.

  and then once a year american's have a tradition where our kids go door to door throughout the neighborhoods on halloween.

  but the jw's kids can't go!

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  aquagirl

  ok,this woman dies and goes to the pearly gates and meet St.Joey Ramone..or St Peter for all of you traditionalists.Anyway,he asks her what religion she was and she says lutheran..He says "ok",looking on a chart,"um,5th door down on the left. Just wait a bit,please" the next woman is asked the same question,and when she informs st.jpoey ramone that she was a mormon,he says "um,ok,8th door on the left,please wait".a few more folks gather in the pearly gates waiting room and when the crowd gets big enough,St J.says,"now,Ive told you all where to go,but please,be very very quiet when passing the 3rd door on the left,ok?".."Why"? askes the first woman.."well",St Joey Ramone says,"thats where the jehovahs witnesses are and they like to think that they are the only ones here".
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  6

  Stupid JW Humor

  by moomanchu in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i apoligize for this i'm just sharing some of the e-mails i recieve from my jw relatives.. .

  the kingdom of god is hiring!

  are you ready to apply?

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  aquagirl

  um,im really looking for something w/a good 401k and a dental plan...hahahha
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  5

  An amusing T-Shirt

  by TheSilence in

  1. social
  2. humour

  i'm not sure if i've done the picture thing right, but if it works it's amusing ;).

  jackie.

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  aquagirl

  wicked funny shirt..i think i subscribe to the rastafarians view of the whole....but i like the catholic and tao lines too...
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  44

  After Armegeddon Whats the plan?

  by purplesofa in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  from the beginning of the jw experiance, i wondered what the plan was going to be after armegeddon.

  we are to expect so much destruction, billions of people destroyed (how many birds does it take to eat 6 billion people in a timely manner?

  ) with the massive deaths and stuff to clean up........peoples bones for one, rebuiling and resurrecting the millions and millions that have died.....teaching them, and working to clean up the planet.

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  aquagirl

  hope that it isnt F.E.M.A.'s gig..they will NEED the millenium....harharharhar
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  28

  "You are the connection to evil." (or, my JW sisters and me)

  by Fleur in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  why is it that i have known for so long what to expect of my jw relatives, and they continue to exceed my expectations for crazy-making behavior, yet still sometimes, i am blindsided by a comment so out of left field, so removed from the way that i see my world and the way that i live my life (or try to)...why does it still hurt?.

  i have posted before about my sisters.

  the oldest is a pioneer and elder's wife.

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  aquagirl

  Fleur,i can sooo relate to your story.When i was in sixth grade I worked really hard and won a 2nd place trophy in our school speaking contest.When I got home,my older sister scoffed at it aqnd said"MY trophy is the bible!!"..Shes still in the borg,married to a hideous horrid thing who is grooming to be an elder.She is having a little fling w/her 'spiritual sister',which everyone is ignoring.I have a feeling that she isnt so full of herself these days,and that she is begining to wake up.Im here if and when she does,but it would have been nice to have a real big sister growing up.Yep,the borg sucked that away too....It sounds like you have a mucho cool husband and a great attitude and understanding of things..Bravo to you....
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  31

  Dont kiss your cat?

  by ButtLight in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  this is from the june 8th, 1989 awake article.

  you have got to be kidding me!.

  and how about the hygiene?

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  aquagirl

  i think that kissing the top of my cats head is a whole lot less dangerous than paying attention to anything that the 'awake' says.
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  26

  Would the world be a better place if everyone was JW?

  by Gill in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  the back of 'the end of false religion is near!

  ' leaflet makes an interesting claim that in the book 'holocaust politics' published in 2001, says : 'if more people practiced versions of what the jehovah's witnesses preach and practice, the holocaust could have been prevented and genocide would scourge the world no more.'.

  do you believe that is true?

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  aquagirl

  it would be a lot like stepford wives...
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  17

  Ladies Only Movie Star Quiz!

  by SWALKER in

  1. social
  2. humour

  ladies only.

  this is fun if you can take a few minutes....... which movie star are you?.

  well, a team of researchers got together and analyzed the personalities.

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  aquagirl

  grace kelly...couldnt be further from the truth..im going for sofia loren
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  30

  I get free food

  by Calico Ethel in

  1. social
  2. humour

  i apparently turn on fast food employees so much so that i get free food frequently.

  today i went to fazoli's to get food for myself and 2 co-workers.

  the guy at the drive thru window thought i was hot and gave me all my food for free - no joke!

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  aquagirl

  some of my female friends are in their mid 40's now,and are starting to look it.they get very happy and excited when they are 'carded' top buy fags or lottery tickets..it stays w/em for daze!!!i mean,these are women who are 'obviously' not 21,if ya know what i mean..but if it makes em happy,i say who does it hurt?and some men just love to flirt w/anyone.the important thing is,DONT TAKE IT PERSONALY.if you do,you will end up getting hurt..if you know that you rock,great.you dont need to have some anonymous talking head telling you that you do...dont get too caught up in your own reflection,youre better than that...or better still.start handing out the compliments to others!they love it!sometimes ill see a sad looking older woman in a store and ill notice her perfume.i always stop and tell her that she smell great!..it never fails to cheer em up..dont misunderstand me,i do have days where i wear big sunglasses and pretend that no one else is in the building.but youve gotta give it out once in a while too..good luck!!!
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  23

  cheesiest movielines

  by tijkmo in

  1. social
  2. entertainment

  http://movies.uk.msn.com/features/cheesiestmovielines2006_article.aspx.

  got any to add...how about this from armageddon.

  the united states government just asked us to save the world.

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  aquagirl

  in titanic,when dicaprio was handcuffed to a pipe and the water was rising and the boat was like popping and exploding and he says"this looks bad"...lol, slays me....i also think its fiendishly funny when he slips beneath the surface in his final scene.just sorta staring out from the depths as he sinks...too funny...