He's great! But he's still in.....it's all they've ever known.
Posts by nsrn
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10Red eyes
by beautifulisfree injust the other day i had a horrible witness flashback.
i remembered that when my dad was an elder...he would come home from his elder meetings with red eyes.
he also would get red eyes whenever he was mad at the family about something 'spiritual' like how we didn't have the pioneer spirit or how we were wearing to short of dresses (even if they came down to the floor).
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103
"Help! my dad is watching Pornography" Cries of a JW teen.
by Dune inas some of you may know, i'm still an active witness and i'm still in the planning stages of my "escape".
i met a sister at a district convention a year ago and i've been talking to her on aim for a while.
i think she is very amusing considering that she is very intelligent and often voices her views on the doctrinal falicies of the wtbs, but when its my turn to give my two cents she makes it seem as if i'm the only poztate.
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nsrn
Yes, that sent up a red flag for me, too. Did she find it hidden at home, on the computer archive, or was it left out for her to see? How old is she? Pedophiles can use porn to entice/educate the child. Hmmm.
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6
Morning conversation with my mom
by mrsjones5 inmom calls me this morning.
chatting, just chatting about my oldest son's birthday yesterday (he turned 12 and we took him to dinner and a good time was had by all), about my sister, about us and the kids going out to california this summer to visit my parents, about when mom should be receiving her girl scout cookies and mary kay order from me.
i related how after the sermon at church my son tried to invite a friend out to his birthday dinner.
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nsrn
Josie, Don't you just heave a sigh of relief when a conversation like you had with your mom happens? She brought up questions, you were honest and matter of fact, and she didn't challenge what you said. R-E-S-P-E-C-T
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10
Red eyes
by beautifulisfree injust the other day i had a horrible witness flashback.
i remembered that when my dad was an elder...he would come home from his elder meetings with red eyes.
he also would get red eyes whenever he was mad at the family about something 'spiritual' like how we didn't have the pioneer spirit or how we were wearing to short of dresses (even if they came down to the floor).
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nsrn
My dad would come home red eyed and blowing his nose, exhausted. He is a tender hearted guy, and I suspect was often the lone voice of mercy at those meetings. I had heard Mom say, "Poppa, I don't know why you put yourself through this." and Dad would say, "because the congregation needs me." Poor Dad.
I saw this in action at my very own elder's meeting, as a quietly rebellious teen, dating a worldly. My dad got all red faced and turned to the p.o. and said, "I know what you want. You want me to throw her out of my house, like you did YOUR kid. Well I won't do it. I know where she'd have to go then. If you think I'm not governing my house well enough, then just consider this my resignation as an elder! " Can you imagine how full my heart was to hear him say that?
A few years later, after I was married and gone, I think he became an elder again, but is now 'retired'.
Even now, in their eighties, my parents are very well respected and treated like beloved grandparents of the congregation. I think it's partly because people remember his empathy.
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33
How to reply to the inevitable invitation to Memorial this year...
by nsrn ini'm anticipating a series of visitis from the witnesses to invite me to memorial.
every year i get a few with the preprinted invitation, a couple slightly old magazines, and big smiles.
these are people who i grew up with, who were kind to me, who honestly think my fade out will cost my eternal soul at the big a. these are the same people who pick up my elderly parents for meetings, bring them food when they are sick, and change their rusted out water heater for them in the dead of winter.
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nsrn
Thanks for the replies. It's the guilt thing. Part of me wants to tell them "Hell, no! Wasn't eighteen years of torture enough???" while the guilty part of me is thinking 'What would one evening hurt? I'm am being selfish. My folks are old, it would please them so much...' Then that kind of thinking literally makes me nauseated.
I have a wonderful church family (Methodist) and a great faith in a loving God. But I just don't think I'll be free of the witness guilt thing until my parents are gone.
If I can avoid answering the door, or at least get my husband to do it, I'll take that route. Or maybe I'll get lucky, and this will be the year they miss me!
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How to reply to the inevitable invitation to Memorial this year...
by nsrn ini'm anticipating a series of visitis from the witnesses to invite me to memorial.
every year i get a few with the preprinted invitation, a couple slightly old magazines, and big smiles.
these are people who i grew up with, who were kind to me, who honestly think my fade out will cost my eternal soul at the big a. these are the same people who pick up my elderly parents for meetings, bring them food when they are sick, and change their rusted out water heater for them in the dead of winter.
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nsrn
I'm anticipating a series of visitis from the witnesses to invite me to Memorial. Every year I get a few with the preprinted invitation, a couple slightly old magazines, and big smiles. These are people who I grew up with, who were kind to me, who honestly think my fade out will cost my eternal soul at the big A. These are the same people who pick up my elderly parents for meetings, bring them food when they are sick, and change their rusted out water heater for them in the dead of winter.
It's so uncomfortable tfor me to answer the door and there they are; grins, bookbags, and too-tight jackets. "We've missed you...we'd love to have you...we are commanded to observe...your folks would be so pleased if you came..." My stomach hurts just thinking about it.
My answers are usually vague, non-committal, and short.
What suggestions do you all have for that visit--especially trying to be kind and respectful to the witnesses?
I've been doing this for 25 years now--you'd think I'd get over it !
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29
Did you give lots of money to the Watchtower?
by JH ini didn't put much money in the contribution box.
just buying a bigger car was my way of contributing financially.
i also was generous with the ones in need.. as far as the watchtower's contribution boxes were concerned, they didn't recieve much from me.
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nsrn
My dad (or sometimes my mom, when there weren't enough 'brothers' in the congregation) handled the accounts for years--lots of times I remember them giving extra to make the accounts report finish "black". I know every month the expeditures were itemized--phone, gas, electric, etc. And building loan and literature to the society...but I can't remember if other money was sent to headquarters. Do any old account servants out there know?
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What's the name of the book used in the "free home Bible study" ??
by garybuss inwhat's the name of the book used in the "free home bible study" on new recruits?
it used to be the knowledge book.
is that changed?
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nsrn
Dang, I'm feeling old again...my knee-jerk answer was "The Truth Book."
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36
What was the nastiest house you got invited into?
by Virgochik inwe actually has a study with a disabled elderly couple living in a trailor.
it was wall to wall filth, rat infested and smelled awful.
i was a child, but mom and dad brought me along anyway.
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nsrn
I can remember going with my dad to a study out in the country--kind of hillbilly folks with no screens, lots of kids and coon dogs, and part of a car engine torn apart on the worn out linoleum floor of the living room. The wife there was a heavyset lady with an apron on all the time. She made the best homemade biscuits with apple butter! Everyone there had about a 600 decibel conversation volume. That combined with the coon dogs made the place seem like a 3 ring circus. It was my favorite study--except for the old alcoholic that was either drunk or in full-fledged dt's every visit. My dad sure could pick em!
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31
Help!!!!! How do I get out of vacation?
by collegegirl21 inokay, so spring break is coming up soon.
i just got off of the phone with my jw mother (i'm still in the religion), and i found out that although i'm in college and was planning on going somwhere else for my spring break, that i now have to go down to memphis, tn with her, my dad and my 2 non-believing aunts and 1 non-believing uncle in an suv from wisconsin.
i then have to stay with them for 5 days while my granddad and my mom fight over scriptures (my granddad is a 7th day adventist) and do nothing.
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nsrn
How about, "Mom, listen, I don't want to hurt your feelings, but I just don't want to go. I feel really resentful when you make plans for my spring break. I feel disrespected that you're not listening to me. If I DO decide to go with you, I will not be attending the hall or go out in service."
I remember when I lived at home, turned 18. Started having homework too heavy to finish on Thursdays, and then scheduling myself to work my part time job on Sunday a.m. When I did have to do out in service, I quit speaking at the doors. (Get paired up with someone you haven't worked with in a while, and at the first door announce, "You do the talking today, I'll just listen to you.") When my parents questioned me about my fade, I was able to tell them that my heart just wasn't in it.
I remember the worst part was knowing I was dissappointing THEM. (My parents)