Want a few more?
1) A new directive has just come down from the Slave that single Brothers are not to wear any tight fitting underwear, as this could potentially arouse unclean feelings and thoughts.
2) All Witnesses must now purchase only 4-door vehicles (proper service cars), and that anyone who is purchasing a 2-door vehicle is showing an independent spirit, and will be "marked" by the elder body.
3) Witnesses are not to eat ice cream cones, as this is a simulation of oral sex; which is unacceptable for Christians.
4) Cartoons are now unacceptable entertainment for Christian children. Talking animals are a simulation of animals containing supernatural powers; which originated in Babylon.
5) The Watchtower Society has put a bounty on AlanF's head. Anyone who captures or kills AlanF will be paid $144,000 or will be given a voucher for the free viewing of ten R-rated movies.