Oh you poor x-mas challenged friends of mine - since I am coming up on my 13th x-mas since leaving the JW's let me give you some advice for the first year user.....
TOP 10 HELPFUL HINTS FOR THE JW'S FIRST X-MAS
1) Don't try to cut down your own tree - those pretty trees in the neighbor's yard are actually part of the landscape and they will have you arrested if you try to take it. Just go to a local neighborhood tree stand and get one.
2) While at the tree farm - make sure that you don't pick up the first tree - that will look like you're a beginner. Look at over 15 different trees - even if you don't know why or what you're doing. At least you'll look like an expert.
3) Have the tree-farm guy cut off about 2 inches from the bottom of the trunk. Then when you get home - put your tree up right away. It will soak up more water and stay fresher. If you don't have a tree stand and can't afford one, buy a smaller tree (4' tall) and use a large coffe can (like a folgers can) - it works in a pinch. Water EVERY day (take it from someone who learned that the hard way)
4) There is a limit to how many strings of lights you can connect together and plug into one socket. (yep - another one I learned the hard way)
5) Buy a couple special ornaments or hand make a couple as keepsakes for your first x-mas. My son and I painted pinecones and hung them on our tree - I still use these and they are a wonderful reminder of our first x-mas celebrated.
6) Cats and trees don't mix well - especially if your cat likes to climb trees. Just beware...If you have a cat like mine perhaps you should decorate your tree with non-breakable ornaments.
7) Santa doesn't really appreciate adults sitting on his knee at the mall.........no matter how sad it is that you missed out on that one, just pass it up. Trust me!
8) Buy a few extra toys and donate them to a children's charity like the Salvation Army x-mas tree. It's a great way to get into the x-mas spirit and feel good about everything.
9) If you decide to visit a living nativity, resist the urge to correct the errors (like the 3 wise men weren't there when Jesus was born - Jesus wasn't born on x-mas, yadda yadda) - most people already know that and don't care - but they are a bit irritated when you point it out.
10) Begin a new christmas tradition that is yours alone. Mine is to buy my kids a special set of pajamas and a stuffed toy - I wrap them and label them as "x-mas eve" presents - every x-mas eve they get to open their first present and go to bed with their new jammies and new teddy bear.
Have fun - and make great memories.