Posts by Dawn

53

I am stuck in a life I don't want and can't see the way out

by Orgull in

some of you have encouraged me already in the week or so i've been here and i think you.. here's the situation.

i am single.

i am 34 years old.

Dawn

Orgull - I think the first thing you need to come to realize is that you are not stuck. You have a difficult road ahead of you, but you are not trapped because you DO have choices and it is up to you which direction you want to head.

You are still young at 34 so don't make the mistake of thinking that it is too late to change your life. My recommendation is that you make a 10 year plan - where do you want to be in 10 years? Then outline the steps to get there and start in that direction. Just realizing that you have a way out will make you feel better.

Perhpas going back to college, even on-line courses. Since you are only working part-time you would probably qualify for financial aid and government grants. Getting your degree would open a lot of doors financially so you would not have to rely on your family so much. Not only that, but you could then afford to hire help for your parents and would not have to worry about their care also.

Take it from someone who made it out to the other side - don't stay trapped. Make a goal and work towards it.

11

How did your JC meeting affect your life?

by hopelesslystained in

here's my story: .

i had only one experience of being counseled by the elders, and it was in a tribunal thingy many years ago when i was 18 living at home with my 'presiding overseer' father.

my dad was overly upset imagining i was smoking pot!???

Dawn

I was DF'd twice (yep - wasn't smart enough to stay away the first time )

My first JC mtg was humilitating, embarassing, degrading - you name it. I was DF'd because I had sex with my boyfriend. And of course, the meeting had to go into every detail about how many times, for how long was this going on, yadda yadda - I was 20 years old and scared to death so I did everything I thought I was supposed to in order to show repentance but still got booted out. That JC meeting really hurt me because it was so humiliating - not only to have to answer the questions they were asking, but they made me feel like scum.

I eventually got reinstated because I thought I "had to" so I wouldn't die at armageddon. But I didn't want to be there anymore - I didn't see the elders as people who were looking out for my interests or protecting me. Instead, they were mean and could not be trusted.

4 years later I had my 2nd JC mtg - that one was much better. I'm not even sure why I went, except that I was still somewhat into the jw mindset and thought I had to go. But basically, I was there again for the same reason - only this time I didn't want to be a JW anymore. I wanted out. I felt like I had been living in a prison and I wanted to break free. So when the elders started asking questions I just blurted out and told them I didn't want to be a witness anymore. They were pretty shocked. In fact, there was one guy there that was actually a very kind brother and he almost cried trying to beg me not to leave. But I did - I got up and walked out. So I was DF'd a second time. That was the worst and best day of my life - for so many reasons that you all can understand.

Jump ahead 16+ years and I have gotten married to a great guy and have 2 wonderful children, went back to school and finished my BS degree, have a good job, and am really happy with life. So in the end, the JC meetings had a good impact because they set me free - but I wish I had been strong enough to just walk away on my own without putting myself through that humiliation and abuse.

26

When Your Beliefs Are Challenged, How Do You React?

by The wanderer in

jw
friends

when your beliefs are challenged, how do you react?when individuals question or challenge you about your beliefs, how do you react?

as a jehovahs witness, many individuals became touchy when questions directed .

toward the watchtower society did not fit the popular conception, thought or ideal.

Dawn

I'm pretty open minded these days - I don't get uptight about having my beliefs challenged. In fact, I am interested in hearing many opinions when it comes to beliefs. I figure the real truth will remain the real truth no matter what I or anyone else believes so why be afraid to ask questions or discuss ideas.

I was wrong once - I'm not arrogant enough to believe I can't be wrong again.

23

Well, I'va made it through Friday.....

by still_in74 in

so i have the friday of the district assembly behind me.

i have learned;.

i need to cancel my cable so i can study more and read the bible more and have less temptation to buy "new toys"i need to sell my house and buy an ol' fixer upper so my wife can stop working and pioneeri need to sell all my "toys" and my cari need to trust the fds implicitly because jehovah does.i need to pray more, study more, preach more, go to more meetings, etc.

Dawn

You know....some of the colliseums where they hold these conventions have wireless internet access. If you had a laptop you could surf the web while you were at the assembly. If you sat up high in the bleachers with noone behind you...you could even surf porn! I don't belive I just said that! Sorry - I couldn't resist - it just sounded too funny to me.

43

Fading In? Am I nuts?

by jaydoe in

jw
friends

i am a baptized jw that faded some years back.

in those days i deeply believed in the org and became disillusioned by some things happening in the local congregation.

following some research on the net i decided to fade out of watchtower existence because i did not want to keep mixing with false religion (or so i thought at the time).

Dawn

So I have thought about fading back in on my own terms.

That would be nice. Unfortunately, I think you'll have about as much success in accomplishing that as you would convincing the government that you'll pay whatever taxes you personally think you should on your own terms.

It's a high control group - you'll have to eventually conform or be shunned.

24

a card I received that reallly upset me

by quietlyleaving in

jw
friends

a couple fo days ago two witnesses knocked with their children, they gave me flowers and a card with the following message:.

"we want you know that we love you, and that you are in our prayers..we are thinking about you.. we remember too, and are grateful for yur support in the past, especially 6 years ago, when you came to the home, following our loss of dennis (not his real name).. in these last days, life is harder then ever.

satan is trying to break all of us, be it through health problems, the ones we love and even our brothers and sisters where it hurts the most.

Dawn

I think their intentions are sincere. Take it as a compliment that they thought of you.

I agree. I think the healthy thing to do would be to just let it go. Don't give it another thought - it's really nothing in the grand scheme of things.

14

I'm certified !

by Dawn in

jw
friends

as a scuba diver that is .

now i can mark off one more thing from my "things to do before i die" list.

i really like this one - i think it's going to be a life long hobby..

Dawn

Joannadandy: I'm heading back over to Puget Sound area in 3 weeks and I'll be diving a local river here with my instructors for some drift diving to practice boyancy. Long term goal is Maui (I'm saving $$ for it).

16

So I went to the DC to hear that "Superiority" Talk

by mavie in

jw
friends

first of all, no recording.

i don't have a recorder.

i arrived at the location rather early, about an hour and a half before the talk was to begin.

Dawn

First one has an unspecified B.S. Said there was a limited secular benefit from university.

Well - I'm not sure what hole this guy has been hiding his head in, but in today's business world there is limited secular beneift from NOT having a degree. Basically leaves you with limited options - like cleaning horse stalls.

14

I'm certified !

by Dawn in

jw
friends

as a scuba diver that is .

now i can mark off one more thing from my "things to do before i die" list.

i really like this one - i think it's going to be a life long hobby..

Dawn

Thanks all.

Dave - I don't have an underwater camera but would like to get one. I decided to do a few more dives and make sure this is something I want to do regularly before I invest in a lot of the equipment. I loved it so much I'm pretty sure it's going to be a life long sport. I'm heading back to the ocean in 3 weeks to do some more diving and can't wait!

I started this "list of things to do" about 5-6 years ago. I decided that since I wasn't spending time at meetings, field service, etc I shouldn't let all that time go to waste but do some things I always wanted or thought would be fun. I started with just a few things on the list and have just kept adding to it as I mark things off or think of new things. So far I've finished my bachelor's degree, took jazz and hip-hop dance lessons (liked that and have kept at it for 4 years now), went white water rafting, kayaking, and just finished salsa dance lessons last month - along with my scuba certification this month. Next on the list is to go somewhere really cool and exotic with my friend for a diving trip, and to learn to play the guitar. The "list" has turned out to be a lot of fun - I keep it on my fridge to remind me of things I should work towards. I'd recommend it to everyone - it's amazing what you can do if you just put that goal in front of you and keep taking baby steps towards it.

14

I'm certified !

by Dawn in

jw
friends

as a scuba diver that is .

now i can mark off one more thing from my "things to do before i die" list.

i really like this one - i think it's going to be a life long hobby..

Dawn

As a scuba diver that is . I just finished my open water certifications last weekend and what a blast that was! I'm planning another trip the end of this month to do 4 more dives, then will work on taking the advanced class.

Now I can mark off one more thing from my "things to do before I die" list. I really like this one - I think it's going to be a life long hobby.