Posts by Quandry

3. If there was something I didn't understand, figured the fault was with me, and that I was spiritually "dull in my thinking" and that if I persevered, I'd eventually understand some "deep spitirual things."

4. Was content to "let the brothers handle it" and "keep my place as a woman"

5. Even though I hated field serve-us, felt that my average numbers kept me in-was part of the great crowd like the average Israelite-that was enough.

6. Always had gatherings at my home, went to quick builds to cook, clean, etc. Wouldn't that be needed in the "new system?"

7. Dressed like the pictures in the magazines. In fact, I used to study them and look for clothes like them.

8. Can't go on-I'll be ill

35

It happened!!!! my first HOLE in ONE!!!!

by dreamgolfer in

july 4th 2012 - 201 yards par 3 with my big driver.

i can die happy!.

i got mine!.

Quandry

That is quite an accomplishment! Congratulations!!!

26

Andy Griffiths Died

by mouthy in

jw
friends

Quandry

I hate to hear it.

I grew up watching Andy of Mayberry.

My family and I went to No Time For Sargeants at the Drive in movie when I was really young. My dad was in the Marines, and even though I was so young I didn't understand the humor, I enjoyed it because my dad laughed so much!

Andy of Mayberry had good humor...it was a wholesome,clean, family oriented show. As Aunt Bee would say, "Ohhhh, Andy!" RIP

19

Not better than others

by sinedie in

as jw's we are taught that we are better than others; that we are almost superior to them.

after finding out ttatt, and realizing that others are actually smarter than me, i feel quite small and insecure about myself.

how do i start friendships with people i knew (sort of) for years, who i was trying to convince that the end is coming soon?

Quandry

Give yourself some time.

I was "in" for over thirty years. When I left, I suddenly had no friends, where before I thought I had hundreds. It is NOT EASY to start from scratch.

Start small, don't expect instant friendships like with the JWs. It will come....we'll never have the "myriads of brothers" that offer conditional friendship, but at least the ones we do have will like the real us.

Quandry-60 years old with few but interesting friends

36

MY FIRST POST

by dazed but not confused in

jw
friends

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Quandry

Welcome.

What an accomplishment-two years sober. It is something to be proud of. How wonderful that your wife stood by you, and that you have her and two children. You have so much...also you mention a brother that is "out." Sounds like a good support system.

Yes, as the others have said, please be patient with your wife as she must have been patient with you many times. Stand by her decision to stay with the JWs. She has two children that she loves more than life and must fear Armageddon coming sooooooooooon and what could happen to them if they leave. Take it slow.....just take your family to fun places on the weekend. Little by little she may enjoy time away from the KHall.

If you must speak about the WTS, phrase your doubts as a question..."Should we think about saving for college for the kids or do we feel that they shouldn't have the option of an education?"

Hope the best for you!

18

Who would like to send a card to Rick?

by mouthy in

jw
friends

r.fearon.

1037 north st. tewksbury ma.

01876 u.s.a .

Quandry

Thanks, Mouthy.

63

Marital problems - advice (or support) please

by jamesmahon in

completely non-jw related this but value the diversity of experience and viewpoint on this forum.

i am going to sketch this out quick as i can but please ask any questions if the gaps need filling.. as some may know, i have been married for 12 years with two children (8 and 4).

my wife stopped work when the eldest was born and has been a stay at home mum since.

Quandry

Are you sure that your wife is not just really bored and seeking attention? You say you work from home. Perhaps you've just never had breathing room from each other.

She also seems insecure...hesitant to take a job but feels like you are suffocating her. She certainly lacks self esteem, and may feel like she has no life other than house cleaning, etc. She may envy your job. It couldn't help that she feels rejected by her father. Perhaps she feels unloved and is looking for validation of yours.

Before you throw in the towel, why not try a few experiments? You don't have to talk with her, but find something to complement each day. Also, see if there's a place away from home where you can do some of your work.

At the same time, find somewhere for the whole family to go, such as a museum. You don't have to have long conversations with her, but invite her along. Just make a family memory that is pleasant.

It would be good if there were some volunteer organization or other group that your wife could get involved in to give her a sense of autonomy and fulfillment.

Please take some time and be patient. Don't lose your family unit too quickly if there is a remedy.

Hope for the best for you all.

56

Greetings! My first post

by BU2B in

hello all at jwn!

i have been a lurker here the last few months and have been going through the process of researching both sides of the story of jehovahs witnesses.

i was raised in the borg, got married and now have a young child.. my wife is very much dedicated to the organization and will justify anything the "slave" does putting it off on the borgs imperfection.

Quandry

Welcome.

So sorry you are in this situation.

Please be patient. It sounds like you have the ideal JW wife that so many strive for!

Just take some family time...go to some interesting places. When you discuss things, ask questions, like, "A person at the door asked me about the 'overlapping generation' and I'm not able to explain it. Can we look at the WT CD and get an explanation?" The WT, of course, has changed the generation view many times in the past few years. That's just one example, you may be able to think of a better one. How about education for your child? What is your wife's goal in that regard?

Don't let them take your family. You must tread carefully.

78

Cheery new Awake! cover - should make it easy to place...

by cedars in

.

Quandry

September...let's see, that's about right. WTS always had a thing for fall and the end.

Wasn't the "time of the end supposed to start in the fall of 1914?

Wasn't the "new system" supposed to be here in the fall of 1975?

And if doomsday is going to come in 2012, fall should be the time to start the panic.

Yes, the "new order" will be here sooooooooooon......