Posts by detective

Yeah, I know- hearing "read a book" right now probably doesn't sound too helpful, but it is. It can provide some helpful tips on dealing with people who are involved in cults and offers some good ideas on communication so that you can avoid some of the pitfalls that plague cult member/non-cult member interactions.

Or, you can just write 'em off. You need to keep yourself mentally healthy.

Oh, and one other thing, since part of this is appears to be about control as Amazing pointed out, my advice is that you might want to wait to respond for a bit. Not too long, but just long enough to create an "awkward pause" in the conversation. I admit it's a little taste of psychological warfare and normally I wouldn't promote it, but in this case it could work to your advantage. Giving a little room for them to wonder will upset the balance of "power" in the conversation. You'll have taken some of your own "power" back and it'll disarm them... just a wee bit. Ultimately, if you decide to have a relationship with them, you'll have to work around and/or undermine the group's control over them (and of their attempt to control you through shunning). Without being abusive, you can start to assert your own power in small ways so that the message that you won't be bullied or manipulated will really hit home for them. They said it was up to you anyway...

32

I Am Changing The Word "Worldly" To Normal....

by minimus in

jw
friends

instead of making the difference known that anyone not a jehovah's witness is "worldly", i think we should simply refer to them as "normal".

detective

Yay!

Finally, somebody refers to me as normal!

7

The Star, God's Plan or Malicious Plot of Satan?

by ignorance is strength in

i'm not talking about stars in general; such a subject about stars in general would be ridiculous.

i'm specifically talking about the star that the three magi saw that led them to jesus.

the wt holds that this was a malicious plot of satan's to bring jesus to herod.

detective

Everybody knows that it wasn't magi who visited baby Jesus- it was shepherds. Um, or was it magi? Or sheherds? Maybe both? I wish those crazy gospels actually told the same story... but then again... when humans play telephone allegedly on behalf of god, sometimes the line gets a bit fuzzy.

As for the star being sent by Satan, if Satan's got enough power to move stars, couldn't he just have sent a meteor crashing down and vaporized baby Jesus on the spot? Why the middle man? Surely there would have been easier ways to get Herod to Christ. Why not train a "messiah-sniffing camel" and just have Herod's folks follow the camel? Not much of a planner, that Satan.

33

When JWs Knock on Your Door....

by Frannie Banannie in

jw
friends

what are your most successful methods for dealing with their visit?

do you prefer to "blow 'em off"?

or do you attempt to dissuade them from their inanity?.

detective

I'm thinking of putting a little sign above the doorbell:

Ring if you love demons!!!

Wonder how inviting that'll be...

93

My two week consulting trip to Bethel (the beginning of the end) part 2

by seven006 in

jw
friends

as we entered a door of the administration building we did not head to the elevator to take us up the eight floors to the main administration floor.

i looked around the room and asked, "what's up with her?

i was going to work with the elder from hell who ran the photography department.

detective

Reading... reading...

waiting.

C'mon now, what's next?

24

two deaths and no calls...

by detective in

well, my disfellowshipped friend was seeking out an older, non-jw relative who he had wanted to invite to a monumental event in his life.

he wasn't able to reach her at her home so he eventually gave up and sought out his jw parents.

in doing so, he learned that the elderly relative had died a little less than a year earlier (a few months after he had been disfellowshipped).

detective

I appreciate the warm thoughts. Thanks to each of you.

It's sad to see how many of you have gone through this.

Teejay, I don't think his father is ever going to snap out of it. However, feeling as royally uh, irked as I do at the moment, I'd love to help slap him out of it. Er, snap him out of it. I mean, encourage him to use another viewpoint. Yeah, that's what I mean.

69

Johnny Depp Likens U.S. to 'Dumb Puppy'

by closer2fine in

jw
friends

http://apnews.excite.com/article/20030903/d7tb04380.html

johnny depp likens u.s. to 'dumb puppy'

sep 3, 11:00 am (et) .

detective

Euphemistically. Yes, but it would have been interesting to see Mr. Depp spell it out. "Americans are like puppies..."

That'd be his fan base he's bashing. Or if it's GWB, he can take the hit like Dixie Chicks did.

That journalist let him get away with a silly generalization. It was a favor of sorts. If Depp had to be more specific, he'd have had to take responsibility in a much more personal sense for those whom he offended. This way he talks about the magical "other"... it's somebody other than me. He's bashing someone other than you.

He's bashing a land mass... hm, okay.

24

two deaths and no calls...

by detective in

well, my disfellowshipped friend was seeking out an older, non-jw relative who he had wanted to invite to a monumental event in his life.

he wasn't able to reach her at her home so he eventually gave up and sought out his jw parents.

in doing so, he learned that the elderly relative had died a little less than a year earlier (a few months after he had been disfellowshipped).

detective

I'm with ya, Czar.

It's brutal.

34

JWs are not brain damaged, but heart damaged!

by Joyzabel in

jw
friends

ive been trying to tell my kids to be patient with the jws that they knew and with family that still are jws.

especially when the shunning is in full force.

i was excusing it as brain damaged because we couldnt reason with them or get through the mental block they have.

detective

I'm sorry for your loss.

Hard-hearted, hard-headed...

so true.