Posts by LisaRose

16

Novelist With Questions

jw
friends

i am a writer, who is at present working on a novel, and i am developing a character/characters who has/have been jehovahs witness(es), and i have some questions that i am hoping someone may be willing to answer.

first, my general credentials.

i am a working writer, with a number of professional poetry publications in journals and lit.

LisaRose

one else who might have some insight here):
I have a follow-up question, if I can bother you one more time. I have done a bit of research now into the matter of the 1975 prophecy, and it seems, based on what I've read so far, that JW folks during that time were both particularly discouraged from and reluctant to have children (and obviously, why wouldn't this be the case, if the End was believed to be imminent?) Yet, as I've structured my plot, my fictional couple would have had at least three children during those years (between 1966 and 1975--in 1969, 1972, and 1974).
This seems as though it might be a problem when it comes to authenticity of my couple as JW folks, especially if quite devout. So, here's my question:

I can speak from experience here, as I was a fully believing JW at the time and my first child was born in 1975. Some people did put off having children due to fears of Armageddon, but other people did not, and of course children have a way of coming even when you don't actually plan them, so it was not considered scandalous to have children, although there might have been a few people who judged you and made comments (of course in a religion like this people judged and made comments about everything anyway). It's not like you could be disfellowshipped for getting pregnant (unless you weren't married of course).

As it got closer to 1975 with no major world events I think even some people who had put off having children decided to just go ahead and have them, as there was a mini baby boom in my congregation, five children born in 1975 in a group of about 100. Even in a doomsday cult I think people just get tired of living in limbo and start wanting to get on with normal life.

53

Health, fitness and recovery advice

by SecretSlaveClass in

i hope this is okay with you simon, but since i've noticed the number of forum members looking to discuss or seek advice on various health issues i thought it would be a good idea to start a thread dedicated to this topic alone.

any discussions or advice on these matters could be put here where any and all would be welcome to jump in with any help they could offer.

i am working on the first questions at the moment taken from the cognac/morpheus weight loss thread.

LisaRose

My schedule is so all over the map it's not funny. My job is pretty stressful and time consuming. I find if I get my exercise routine stopped I don't get back to it. Sometimes I have stressful situations for months at a time at work. Other times I am not very busy at all. I don't have a regular schedule where 30 minutes of free time is available to me consistently to do some fun kind of exercises - you know the enjoyable things like you mentioned and of course, horseback riding which is really more like a 4 hour minimum thing.

Wow! Heavan that sounds rough. I used to work in a group called "trouble management", so I get it. Those auditors would puzzle over a potential problem all day then open a ticket at 5:00 pm so they could go home, meaning I had to stay and fix it, with big money on the line, the clock was ticking. I liked the adrenaline rush, but it took a toll.

You might want to consider if carving out some time for exercise, even if it's five or ten minutes here or there, might make you able to work more effectively and be well worth the time investment. Sometimes when people are stressed they work more as a coping mechanism, as it gets your mind off other things. It then becomes a vicious cycle as you get stressed from working too much. Sometimes you have to step away from the situation for a bit to see potential solutions, maybe you could delegate or do something else to lighten the load. Everyone has their limits and while it's good to to feel needed, sometimes you have to say no. I don't know your particular situation, but just something to think about from a former workaholic.

53

Health, fitness and recovery advice

by SecretSlaveClass in

i hope this is okay with you simon, but since i've noticed the number of forum members looking to discuss or seek advice on various health issues i thought it would be a good idea to start a thread dedicated to this topic alone.

any discussions or advice on these matters could be put here where any and all would be welcome to jump in with any help they could offer.

i am working on the first questions at the moment taken from the cognac/morpheus weight loss thread.

LisaRose

Well I am definitely a classic mesomorph, good to know. I don't know if I would be your perfect client Secret Slave, I still have a long way to go, but I am sure you would get me there a lot faster.

I gained thirty pounds from the medication I was taking, and I was somewhat overweight already. After getting off the medication I've been able to lose twenty of it and I know I can get the last ten off, then I will see how it goes. My goal is to be healthy, being skinny is not as important to me and I don't care how long it takes. I am 5' 3" with a medium frame, I will probably end up in the 130-140 range. At my age you need a little fat to fill out those wrinkles, lol.

Kidding me, I was an all or nothing type too, so I get it. My illness forced me to be smarter and now I can see it's the only way to go. When people see you looking good they won't care of it took you a year, two years or six months to get that way, so just hold on to you goal and forget the time table. I've worked through injuries and multiple bouts of illness, because I can adjust, slow down but not give up. I don't know what clicked for me that I couldn't do this before, I think I just got mad because everyone started acting like I should just give up, like it was over for me and I just wasn't having it. It just made me more determined to prove I could do it. There is a lady who sells at my antique mall that is in her eighties, so I have no excuse to give up on anything.

53

Health, fitness and recovery advice

by SecretSlaveClass in

i hope this is okay with you simon, but since i've noticed the number of forum members looking to discuss or seek advice on various health issues i thought it would be a good idea to start a thread dedicated to this topic alone.

any discussions or advice on these matters could be put here where any and all would be welcome to jump in with any help they could offer.

i am working on the first questions at the moment taken from the cognac/morpheus weight loss thread.

LisaRose

But I was exhausted, my legs feeling like weights were on them when I would walk. I was taking advil and sometimes a recovery drink just to make it through to the next workout. I sort of fell off.

Kidding me, I think your problem with exercise is that you were trying to do too much too soon. Especially as you get older it's important to give your body time to adjust to doing more, pushing yourself to the point your legs feel like weights is too much, with the inevitable result that you get discouraged and quit or cut down too much. I am 61 and can do 10,00 steps now, but I had to work up to that over a period of six months. It wouldn't take you as long of course, but what ls important is creating life long habits, not how fast you get there.

I am always struggling with this concept, as I am sure many do. if I didn't push myself some I would still he a couch potato, but if I push too much then it's counterproductive. You really have to learn to listen to your body, to pay attention to what it is telling With my being older and having multiple health issues I had to start very slowly and work my up. You will be able to go faster but the concept is the same, each time you add time or increase reps give your body a chance to adjust.

I don't get what i was doing wrong this time but I know that WW is working for now. I'm not sure if i was stressing my body out trying to burn so many calories just so I could keep eating what i wanted. Sometimes I would be way less than the 750 daily calorie deficit. I also didn't force myself to eat breakfast and lunch. I would sometimes do one or the other depending on how busy my work day was. Now, I'm doing both, just so there are no unused points at the end of my day.

I don't think it's a good idea to do less than a 750 calorie deficit. Just like with the exercise you should be looking at this as a long term strategy, not how quickly you can lose. I have heard that creating too much of a deficit will cause your body to go into starvation mode, your metabolism will actually slow down and start burning less calories, so it's counter productive. That is why they generally tell you to not skip meals, you want to keep your metabolism at its maximum.

The other problem is that you are setting yourself up for failure. You can white knuckle your way through a very restrictive diet in the short term, but you will eventually hit a wall, get discouraged or tired of the deprivation and fall off your diet and gain the weight back. You don't just want to lose X pounds but to keep them off in the long run. It's far better to lose twenty pounds and keep them off than to lose forty and just regain it that the end of six months.

21

"mum, i been naughty, i'm disfellowshipped."

by Sabin in

jw
friends

so last night we get a phone call from our girl & she tells me the above.

turns out she has been d'ed for a month.

infact she made me turn off the speaker phone so her dad wouldn't hear & i could tell him quietly later.

LisaRose

It's a cult. They are using fear, obligation and guilt to maintain control over your daughter. Her being disfellowshipped does not help her break free because by engaging in conduct they have convinced her is sinful she has become too filled with guilt to think rationally. This is what they do and how they maintain control. I strongly urge you to read Freedom of Mind: Helping Loved Ones Leave Controlling People, Cults, and Beliefs (2012) by Steve Hassan.

I haven't yet read this book, but I have read his first book. He has had success in helping people break free of this thinking. Going on about the many faults of the Watchtower will not work, she has been trained to see this as an attack by Satan, it just causes her to become fearful. Steve first tries to engage with people on a personal level and reach their non cult personality by talking about their life before the cult, or their hopes and dreams before the cult thinking took over. He uses family members to reach out to them and remind them of those important relationships. Maybe you could try asking her what she would do with her life if she wasn't a Jehovah's Witness. You could ask her what she thinks about those who have given their life to the religion because they thought Armageddon was so close and who now have nothing. You know your daughter and what her thoughts might be, what might be potential issues.

4

My parents haven't been to a meeting for a year now....

by purrpurr in

jw
friends

now don't get me wrong, they still consider themselves jw's.

but they seem to be plagued with ill health... especially on meeting days?

they are very depressed about it of course and moan about how much they would like to be at the hall.

LisaRose

I am sure it's mostly subconscious. They don't enjoy the meetings but think they should go, but as it gets closer to time for the meeting they just automatically start focusing more on their aches and pains until they really do feel sick. They aren't faking exactly, just being human.

It doesn't help that when they do go they get talked to like they have done something wrong. Don't the elders realise that they are just making the situation worse? It makes me think of this scripture:

Is anyone among you sick? Then he must call for the elders of the church and they are to pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer offered in faith will restore the one who is sick, and the Lord will raise him up, and if he has committed sins, they will be forgiven him.

It doesn't say anything about giving the sick one a beat down for missing the meetings.

9

The restaurant at the end of the universe

by Xanthippe in

jw
friends

i sat outside at a cafe with my cappuccino for the first time today.

the sky was blue, the birds were singing, i could hear a woodpecker in the tall trees.

i closed my eyes and felt the sun on my face for the first time in months and i thought, i could sit here until the end of time.

LisaRose

I was able to get out for a bit of gardening today. It was lovely, 70 degrees and sunny, a perfect spring day. Our recent rains have resulted in incredible growth, Honeysuckle is starting to bloom and roses will be soon.

I finished this sign for my business also. I make reproductions of vintage advertising signs from reclaimed wood, or in this case and old headboard. It's my biggest sign to date, I'm pretty happy with it.

15

JW Vs. Mormon program

by pixel in

i will like people on this forum and lurkers to see the big different between jws and other religion.

following you will see the program from the upcoming distric/regional 2016 convention.

look at the topics that are going to be discussed.

LisaRose

While they may seem less cultish than the JWs, at least by these topics, they still use the same mind control techniques as any cult, controlling your time, controlling your friends, claiming to be the sole source of salvation, etc.. A cult is a cult.

What may be happening is that the Mormon hierarchy attempting to move the religion more towards the mainstream while the Jehovah's Witnesses are moving the other way; more control, more paranoia, more stupidity.

83

Why all the hate...

by Dystopia in

...toward jehovah's witnesses?

LisaRose

I don't think we should delete a thread just because someone says something we don't like. Dystopia asked a legitimate question for someone who is a believing Jehovah's Witness and he got some excellent responses. We should allow believing Jehovah's Witnesses to come here and challenge us as long as they don't break the Forum rules. Otherwise we are no better than the Watchtower, who shuts down anyone who doesn't believe 100% in the Governing Body.

83

Why all the hate...

by Dystopia in

...toward jehovah's witnesses?

LisaRose

I don't hate Jehovah's Witnesses individually, but I do hate the Watchtower as an organization. I think you should hate any organization that lies about its history, uses cult mind control and covers up the sexual abuse of children.