Posts by LouisaWas

47

While a JW, Did You Ever Let On That You Were "Going Apostate"?

by minimus in

jw
friends

i never did, although i did tell my former bible student/tennis partner that the bible does not condemn celebrating birthdays or recommend celebrating anniverseries.

he told his jw brother who told his elders who told my po.

when the po asked me about the conversation, i told him he asked me some questions and i truthfully answered., i said, "nothing i said was wrong or incorrect".

LouisaWas

Hmmm...I am not sure if they considered this to be an apostate statement or not...I told them that I had issues about guns...they asked me if I owned a gun and I said no....they asked me if I wanted to own a gun and I said no...they asked me what the problem was....I said basically the problem was....if I came home and someone was raping my daughter I would pick up a candlestick, a baseball bat...pretty much anything in my house and kill the person raping my child, which to me made all objects in my house equal to that of a gun, I told them I felt it was my Godly duty and obligation to protect my children from would be killers and pediphiles with anything I could get my hands on, that my children had more right to be here than they did...and I swear to you they told me I had a serious problem and they were going to pray for me...I told them I was going to pray for their children. I think it is a sorry parent that will not protect their child by every means possible. So...I am not sure if at that point they began to think of me as an apostate....then at one point an elder brought the circuit sevant over to see me. I was burning a Christmas candle that I had purchased a couple of months ago on sale for a quarter. They looked at me like I had three heads...I just explained that was another area where I just thought they were nuts...to me it was just a red candle that I paid a quarter for...to them it was a CHRISTMAS candle...

27

Would you still remember most names of JW's in your congregation?

by JH in

jw
friends

.

would you still remember most names of jw's in your congregation if you saw them again.. let it be the children or people your age or older.. gee, even when i was active, i knew less than half the names of brothers and sisters and their kids..

LouisaWas

Yes..since I spent most of my life in the congregation I would...I might no longer recognize some since they have aged...and I have as well.

87

How many 'real" friends did you ever really have in ther "truth'

by The Lone Ranger in

jw
friends

sure we got to know a lot of people, we knew a lot more people then the average person, but how many real friends did we ever have?

a friend that we could trust, that we could confine in.

i can say i had just one, bro x and even then i still had to be careful, bro x is an elder now and he tells me that im the only real friend hes ever had, he cant freely talk to anyone.

LouisaWas

One thing to be real careful about...often people who were your friends while you were in the organization will leave also...they will seek you out so you can "talk". Later these people may (and often do) choose to return to the K.H. and they wil then have a guilty conscience...so they are going to sing like the Platters...be careful what you say if you are a person who just "faded".......

58

Why is the WTBTS so against mental health professional treatment?

by Gill in

following on from sandy's thread on her brother's pt, i wondered exactly why does the wtbts take such an opposing stand to professional mental health treatment?

LouisaWas

I suspect the Society has to also do a little CYA in "allowing" (note the quotations-I believe though it is published that it is allowed it is still frowned upon) members to seek help for mental/emotional problems. If there is a suicide or death due to a mental illness and they have forbidden help their would be the possibility the Society would be sued...or at the very least there would be a scandle published in newspapers. So don't mistake those articles for any caring on the part of the Governing Body...they are just trying to stay out of trouble.

31

You Will Know By The Love They Have Among Themselves

by Corvin in

the organization of jehovah's witnesses boasts of having true brotherly love for one another.

i always believed they did, although i never felt it growing up in it.

i reckoned that there was something wrong with me since i never felt that "joy" and "spirit of love" that supposedly permeated the congregations.

LouisaWas

I forgot to tell you one funny thing that happened in our family....my Grandmother had a long estranged Sister (because of the truth) that became terminally ill. At this point my Grandmother (who really was a dear person) elected to help care for her and try to mend some fences. When she died much of my Great Aunt's family was to come over to Grandmother's house for food. My Great Aunt's family were all Baptist. Well..our family decided that this was an opportunity to put on a great witness to them as to how wonderful we J.Ws are....so we all went to Grandmother's to make sure the house was spotless and take food...the whole deal. Well..you never heard such squabbling in your life between us all...my Aunt chewed me out because I brought my cake over uniced and was going to frost it there on the kitchen counter and I might get frosting on it (I did not want to risk messing my cake up in transit) and we got into an argument and I went home in tears...other arguments broke out and then we were supposed to be there all smiles and sweet, perfect little J.Ws putting on a good Witness for those awful Baptists.....and just maybe the Elder's would have a talk with me later about where I frost my cakes!

31

You Will Know By The Love They Have Among Themselves

by Corvin in

the organization of jehovah's witnesses boasts of having true brotherly love for one another.

i always believed they did, although i never felt it growing up in it.

i reckoned that there was something wrong with me since i never felt that "joy" and "spirit of love" that supposedly permeated the congregations.

LouisaWas

I do recollect some really good people in the congregation...long ago when the congregation was small, back in the sixties and I was a child. As I grew older and became more aware of things I realized that I was "marked" because my Mom had married out of the truth back in the forties...so we were not really allowed to play with other children within the congregation, though I had cousins in the truth that I played with. Even though I pioneered and did more than Elders kids I was still "marked". While there were some really nice people there were lots of real nuts...scary people who were over the top that you just knew to say hello to and then keep your distance. The congregation seemed to be almost divided into classes...the top of the line JW...the kind of middle JWs like us...then the sorry, good for nothing JW that was just there to keep the seat warm. My Mom used to say, "...there is nothing in this world worse than a half-assed Jehovah's Witness" I can recall as a very small child...about 7 years old being sent out in the service with a pioneer sister that I did not know well. She was new to our Congregation. We were in rural territory and I was afraid of her. We were in service all day and I did not know what to do about going to the bathroom I finally told her I needed to go and she said we would go later. Much later I mentioned it again and she said later. Well..much later while standing on someone's porch I went. I still feel so much humiliation about that. You know she just acted like she didn't see it...we just kept on going and it was never mentioned. I wore soggy underpants the rest of the day. Yet I am the one that feels ashamed about that. I spent many a long day out in service like that...trying to hold my bladder...having to pee in ditches when the opportunity presented itself. No wonder I hated going. Yet at 5 years old I could do my whole little presentation and it made everyone so proud...so I did it. As I got older and had my own children I remember trying to get them ready and get to meetings on time..by the time I got there I was exhausted. I would look around and see the others there and I pretty much concluded they were in the same shape. I did not feel love in the congregation...I felt exhaustion all around me. I about decided that if you missed a meeting they were all jealous because you may have gotten a few minutes of peace and rest. After the meetings you heard lots of complaining....I think because the only legitimate excuse to get out of a meeting or service was sickness. I don't think I saw a lot of happiness, I don't think I felt a lot of love....mostly I saw and felt criticism. They were the quickiest people to critique I have ever seen...and honestly, I was that way myself for a long time and I had to break myself of that because it is a bad way to be. Since I no longer attend meetings my Aunt is always telling me there is no happiness outside of Jehovah's organization. I know she means well...I have to bite my tongue to keep from telling her that I have never seen her happy...she has to be one of the most unhappy, perfectionistic people I have ever seen in my life. I want to tell her I am much more loving, much more forgiving and understanding of others and much happier since I no longer force myself to undergo that scrutiny three times a week and attempt to go through my life like I am walking a tight rope. I like myself very much now...before I thought something was wrong with me and I would never be good enough for anything. I also recall a scripture in the Bible about how to treat Widows and Orphans and an article in the Watchtower about treating wives with unbelieving mates as such...when I went to school I did not associate with worldly kids..but the Witness kids acted like I did not exist. I ate lunch by myself and walked home alone. My Mom was invited over to their Mom's house for lunch either...of course, my Mom was a damned bombshell and couldn't have covered it up had she tried...all the Sisters in the congregation envied her and anytime they could pick on her they did. OH and another interesting thing and this is a hoot. In high school I got a part time job in a department store working behind a cosmetic counter...the brothers had a talk with me about wearing MAKEUP...they made the inuendo that I was trying to look sexy...I told them I was just trying to use the products that I sold and after all...I was 17 and I loved working with makeup which they thought was totally stupid. They pointed out their daughters did not do such (They sure needed it!) .I went on to become a National Makeup Artist.

22

Could this really be the TRUTH?

by purplesofa in

an explanation of the genesis account

this is from a friend of mine that is not a baptised jw.

he was raised by a jw mother, unbelieving father.

LouisaWas

Geronimo--great post, and I very much agree with you...but, could a reasoning person go against his his predisposition....(say he is genetically predisposed to stealing and his circumstances are such that he is in need and in an easy position to do some swiping) What if he is able to reason it out in his mind that this is really wrong. It might be quite a mental fight for him...but would this be free will of sort? When learned behavior actually takes over? Like when a genetically fat person learns new behaviors that helps them to lose weight...it almost goes against nature for them to achieve it but they want to do it so much they make the extra effort that it takes. Perhaps this is what the Apostle was referring to when he spoke of pummeling his body and leading it as a slave....I hope the other poster was incorrect about the suicide thing since my Dad was a suicide! That bites! Guess I had best keep an eye on myself!

58

Why is the WTBTS so against mental health professional treatment?

by Gill in

following on from sandy's thread on her brother's pt, i wondered exactly why does the wtbts take such an opposing stand to professional mental health treatment?

LouisaWas

I worked in the cardiac rehab section of a large hospital. One of the things we did with our patients was a brief "personality profile"....and we had a number of Witness patients that came in. While religion was not noted on these test I knew they were Witnesses because I had been a Witness...one of the peculiar things I noted was that each of these patients were off the scale on the perfectionistic area. I am thinking that people who became interested in the field and joined....something was screwy with them in the first place. People that were born into the organization...well, you might have been born normal but you were going to have your head messed with and screwed over many times. I went into therapy and pretty much I was told I had no idea who I was..that I had conformed into what I was expected to be and I needed to firgure out what I liked, what I enjoyed and get to know myself...I sort of enjoyed this. I was told not to make judgments about myself and to try to turn the "tapes" off in my head about what was good and what was bad. When I first went into therapy and started talking my therapist listened to me talk for about four weeks. The fifth session he told me that at first he thought some of the stuff I had told him was invented...that I had to have been lying...but as the more I talked the more things came together. He told me in all of his years of talking to anyone he had never talked to anyone with a conscience as sensitive as mine and I was absurdly honest. ( I still have a problem with being honest to the point that I will cause myself great loss...and I feel compelled to answer a question if asked...I don't know why!) It was fun figuring out who I am...how I like to dress...the color that I is MY favorite...how I like to decorate MY home...etc. I didn't worry what others would think...its a good starting point. Of course, I was born into the organization....my Grandparents and great grandparents were witnesses and I had expectations from day one as how I was to act and behave and I always feared I would not be loved if I was different from what they wanted.. Isn't it sad that we can love our family so much that we will be what they want us to be...but they don't seem to be able to love us enough that they can allow us to be the person we were simply born to be. I never wanted to be a bad person...I just wanted to be myself. I am thankful for the good morals, I am appreciative that I am not a racist...I am thankful for learning about God..I wish I had been allowed to have been myself sooner and I wish my parents could have known me...they died before I was born.

59

Disfellowshipping the obese?

by dido in

jw
friends

has anyone posted this, or has anyone heard that you can now be d/f for being obese?

not that i am, (slightly overweight but arent most people?

) but am curious to find out if it is true.

LouisaWas

Back around 1973 my poor Mom was counciled for going to Weight Watchers...the two elders that talked to her both had very heavy wives. My Mom kept going despite their talk with her. She lost thirty pounds and looked wonderful. The elders wives continued to pork up and were probably carrying well over 200 pounds...my Mom was built like Marilyn Monroe and gorgeous! I bet they secretly wished their wives had gone and had the determination my Mom had. Their daughters are all well over two hundred pounds as well. Later my Mom HAD to work because my Dad was ill...she had to wear a uniform to work and would come to meetings after she got off..wearing her uniform which was navy pants, a white shirt and a navy sweater. They gave her hell about the navy slacks. She bore up under the pressure for a long time but she finally just broke down and quit going. Rather than commending her for making it to the meetings after a long day at work they just had to tear into her....how ridiculous and small of them. I still cannot forgive them for hurting her so. A woman who tried so hard and had so much burden, trying to raise 4 children with a sick husband...and rather than try and lighten her burden it was like...what can we do to try and discourage you as much as possible? Reason being? She married out of the truth when she was 17....she deserved any hell that should ever come her way in their eyes.

71

PO said automation and declining contributions reason for Bethel layoffs

by truthseeker in

jw
friends

last week at the meeting, the po, who has very close connections to bethel, said that he never thought he would see the day that bethelites were being sent home.

he said that the biggest two reasons he thought bethel were cutting back, was automation and a massive decline in contributions.

looks like you're right metatron about the contribution aspect being their achilles heel.

LouisaWas

I vaguely remember...as the "truth" began to dawn upon me...going to a new aquisition in New Jersey...it was an old theatre where the chandelier itself, once reconditoned was worth over a million dollars. The upper boxes were closed off and guarded...which struck me as strange. Did we not pay for this...and now we could not see it? Anyway...Here we as we prepared for the time of the end, we had made this expensive aquisition (that we could not see...it is probably sold by now) Additionally the Kingdom Hall that we had in our home town was warranted as not being adequate and it was decided that we must build a better one (this was about 1994) Each family was told to commit to how much they could promise to pay each month. Personally I felt this was lunacy...I thought our Kingdom Hall was perfectly fine. It seemed to me that so many brothers and sisters were having such a hard time financially everywhere...why burden them with more? As I began to "hear" more at meetings it seemed to me that Thursday nights was nothing more than a calling for more money in one form or another...be it in the form of getting it at the door, promising to put it in the contribution box or leave it in a will. It was like a big awakening. It was quite a contrast to my Mom telling me about the Churches and their collection plates being passed on Sunday...I began to think the collection plate would be less pressure. With my job I went to "sales" schools and I began to compare what I learned about sales and what I heard on Thursday night about overcoming objections...it was the same thing. As far as donations are concerned...the Society has created a subculture of poor people..not allowing them to attend College and for so long not even technical schools...most Witnesses do not have good paying jobs, or at least did not when I was one. I also recall at conventions many families in an effort to save money would take home packed lunches. This was soon frowned upon because it took away money from the concession stands...so you were to purchase from the concession stands and then make a donation. Well...then they started saying the donations were not equalling the amount consumed. Did it not occur to them that these families perhaps could not afford to make the trip, stay in a hotel and eat at the convention? Perhaps they should have left well enough alone and let them bring their sandwich and cookies? Or maybe they were getting enough money and just wanted more? I never knew what became of that situation because that was the last convention I attended.