Posts by I.Wonder

Yes and it ended up being "maybe we should call the elders, they can help you" type of thing. However it is a good reminder for me to come from a place of "I need to confide in you" rather than "I hate this religion and it sucks". Non confrontational is definately the way to go. Thanks willyloman.

Balsam thanks sooo much for posting your friends experience. It really gives me something to think about and some hope as well.

IW

24

Former/Current Elders, MS, or anyone who wants to give their $.02

by I.Wonder in

jw
friends

i was wondering what an elder or ms might say to a wife who has an unbelieving mate?.

especially if her mate is in direct opposition of the truth.

i dont necessarily mean that her life in any physical danger.

I.Wonder

"turn the other cheek" I am afraid I haven't got that one down just yet!

It is so hard for me to listen to him tear into me and not get defensive. I've never been the meek submissive wife that he has wanted me to be. I have really had to force myself to be a JW let alone a "christian". "turning the other cheek" isn't so easy (for me) when I am being machine gunned with accusations and insults.

My husband is wonderful and as I long as I got to the meetings and keep my trap shut about how I feel about the "truth" then things really are great. We enjoy hanging out together and most of the time we are laughing together rather than fighting. He really treats me good but the second he gets thinking that I am going to "fall out of the truth" he gets scared and then upset.

It's just hard for me to keep my mouth shut and continue to attend meetings regularly. I am really just venting. I am sorry I am dumping all of my crap onto all of you.

IW

24

Former/Current Elders, MS, or anyone who wants to give their $.02

by I.Wonder in

jw
friends

i was wondering what an elder or ms might say to a wife who has an unbelieving mate?.

especially if her mate is in direct opposition of the truth.

i dont necessarily mean that her life in any physical danger.

I.Wonder

I meant a JW wife. I want to know what a JW should do. However (now that you mention it) I would like to know what a "TRUE CHRISTIAN" wife would do. I am sorry but it is no so obvious to me.

I appreciate your input!

Thank You,

IW

31

Make Up Some Topic Subjects That Would Be Interesting To See

by minimus in

jw
friends

here's a few to get the ball rolling------#1 circuit overseer says we can take blood now!------#2 simon plans on closing jwd down!

!----#3 bush asks for forgiveness concerning iran!-----#4 ask (insert whatever name) a question--------#5 ways for disfellowshipped ones to irritate witnesses .

do you have any subjects that might be fun or questionable or funny to add here??

I.Wonder

Sister (insert name) gives first talk from platform!

24

Former/Current Elders, MS, or anyone who wants to give their $.02

by I.Wonder in

jw
friends

i was wondering what an elder or ms might say to a wife who has an unbelieving mate?.

especially if her mate is in direct opposition of the truth.

i dont necessarily mean that her life in any physical danger.

I.Wonder

Thank for you replies guys. I guess when it comes down to it I am really afraid that my husband will leave me if I am no longer in the truth. Thats' what hurts so much! I don't know for sure if he would leave me, it's just some of the comments he makes gets me wondering.

Thanks,

IW

24

Former/Current Elders, MS, or anyone who wants to give their $.02

by I.Wonder in

jw
friends

i was wondering what an elder or ms might say to a wife who has an unbelieving mate?.

especially if her mate is in direct opposition of the truth.

i dont necessarily mean that her life in any physical danger.

I.Wonder

Thank you all soooo much!

IW

edited to add:

I didn't not see all of your responses until after I responded - it takes me a long time to type.

Again thanks a bunch! It helps me so much to see both sides of the story.

So what do you guys think? How would you suggest I react to my hubbie when he freaks out about me not going to meetings, without me seeming like a angry "apsotate"? (see my 3rd post on this thread)

24

Former/Current Elders, MS, or anyone who wants to give their $.02

by I.Wonder in

jw
friends

i was wondering what an elder or ms might say to a wife who has an unbelieving mate?.

especially if her mate is in direct opposition of the truth.

i dont necessarily mean that her life in any physical danger.

I.Wonder

Thanks Moanzy and Finally-Free for responses!

Let me tell you why I ask.

My husband and I are both JW's. He was born in and I started studying when I was 14. It took me like 7 or more years to finally get baptized. I had my doubts about the "truth" but I figured since my hubbie had gotten baptized that I should follow suit. Don't get me wrong I really did have spurts well I believed it was the truth but it would last.

I am trying to do a subtle fade but my hubbie is so suspicious of me. Every time I try to stay home from a meeting or from field service he gets really upset. It ends up in an argument of the "truth" is the "truth” and if I (IW) can't see that then there must be something wrong with me!"

I don't want to argue about whether the religion is right or wrong. I just want to stay home! I just want to fade away!
So today I thought to myself "how would the wife of with an unbelieving mate react?" "If I reacted to my husbands "persecution" of me not going to the meetings (and out in service) like a "good Christian wife" would react to her unbelieving mates "persecution" for going to meetings. Then maybe my hubbie wouldn't have anything to hold against me."

Am I being totally ridiculous? I want an honest answer, PLEASE!!

I really just want a non-defensive way of dealing with this. I don't know how to do that! When he lets into me I instantly want to tell him how the "truth" is a big joke and that I don't want to be apart of the Watchtowers mind control! If I react that way however it only makes things worse! He then accuses me of not being "spiritual" and that I am acting "worldly". I don't want to give him any reason to think that way. Is that even possible for me to do?

I hope this makes sense. Thanks for listening.

IW

24

Former/Current Elders, MS, or anyone who wants to give their $.02

by I.Wonder in

jw
friends

i was wondering what an elder or ms might say to a wife who has an unbelieving mate?.

especially if her mate is in direct opposition of the truth.

i dont necessarily mean that her life in any physical danger.

I.Wonder

How did she handle that? Did she stick up for herself or was she more passive about it all? If you don't mind me asking.

IW

24

Former/Current Elders, MS, or anyone who wants to give their $.02

by I.Wonder in

jw
friends

i was wondering what an elder or ms might say to a wife who has an unbelieving mate?.

especially if her mate is in direct opposition of the truth.

i dont necessarily mean that her life in any physical danger.

I.Wonder

I was wondering what an Elder or MS might say to a wife who has an unbelieving mate?

Especially if her mate is in direct opposition of the “truth”. I don’t necessarily mean that her life in any physical danger. I’m more thinking along the lines of being harassed. Like every time she gets ready for a meeting he starts an argument. Or maybe he constantly slams her beliefs, causing her emotional stess/upset.

How should a “Christian” wife react in such circumstances (according to the wts)? Have any of you ex-brothers had to “encourage” a sister in this area? Have any ex-sisters here received said “encouragement”?

Sorry for all the dub speak! I didn't know how else to word this!

Thank You,

IW