dyan4help

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Posts by dyan4help

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  25

  Have you ever...

  by AGuest in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  had someone well-respected like:the mutual friend whom everyone loves... orthe teacher whom everyone loves... orthe boss/co-workers whom everyone loves... orthe elder/po/elder's wife/po's wife whom everyone loves... orthe pioneer sister whom everyone loves... orthe young handsome ms whom everyone loves.... say something to you... that they wouldn't in a million years say to anyone else... or cop to when the matter is presented to them because they could not bear to have folks know they really think that way?

  so that when it all is brought forth, you are made to look like the trouble-maker because you said that such one said something they indeed did say... and yet, in the face of those who "love and respect" them, vehemently deny it?

  or have you had others, including perhaps one of those above, say you said something you didn't say, not necessarily because they misunderstood you, but more truthfully because they heard what they wanted to hear... rather than what you were saying... because their minds... and hearts... were in a whole different place... a place where they were trying to find something "against" you so that they could say, "aha!

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  dyan4help

  AGuest,

  I have always seen the kindness in all of your comments that I have read on this board. Please know that you have personaly touched my heart with your words. Although I have lost my desire for organized religion I never lost faith in God or Christ. I believe in their existence. I am no longer sure what part God plays in mans life on earth or what he expects me to do. I no longer trust anything I have been taught in the bible because I am afraid of hanging onto something the witnesses twisted in their favor. My children are thrilled at not going to meetings anymore but sometimes say things about God and the bible that hurt my heart. I want to pass on to them a belief in God but I can't answer their question about what is going on in their world and why. How were you able to move on with your faith? I don't want to fall into another trap.

  Dyan

  I admire the strength of your belief.
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  25

  Have you ever...

  by AGuest in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  had someone well-respected like:the mutual friend whom everyone loves... orthe teacher whom everyone loves... orthe boss/co-workers whom everyone loves... orthe elder/po/elder's wife/po's wife whom everyone loves... orthe pioneer sister whom everyone loves... orthe young handsome ms whom everyone loves.... say something to you... that they wouldn't in a million years say to anyone else... or cop to when the matter is presented to them because they could not bear to have folks know they really think that way?

  so that when it all is brought forth, you are made to look like the trouble-maker because you said that such one said something they indeed did say... and yet, in the face of those who "love and respect" them, vehemently deny it?

  or have you had others, including perhaps one of those above, say you said something you didn't say, not necessarily because they misunderstood you, but more truthfully because they heard what they wanted to hear... rather than what you were saying... because their minds... and hearts... were in a whole different place... a place where they were trying to find something "against" you so that they could say, "aha!

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  dyan4help

  Thank you AGuest......

  This fight went as far as the CO getting involved and I proved that the PO lied to them. They just closed ranks and I ended up disfellowshipped and he is still in good standing.

  I spent 25 years defending the witnesses to my family and co-workers and people who were friends of the family. We had friends because my husband was not a witness. I really don't mind losing faith in organized religion, its losing faith in my ability to make sound judgements for me and my children. I am ashamed to let anyone know what they did to me. Unlike most on this forum I was the only one in my family that was a witness. I preached to and fought with them but thank God no one listened to me. With my husband gone I only have my 4 children and an aged mother-in-law that I am taking care of. 2 of the kids are grown and gone. I would loose what respect they have for me if they knew everything that happened. I suffer in silence. I am not big on expressing my feelings. The people on this forum are as important to me as my family. I hurt for the silent lambs that are here. I understand the hurt and the anger and pain. And great kindness from you when you acknowledge my pain. Thank you for being there.

  Dyan
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  25

  Have you ever...

  by AGuest in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  had someone well-respected like:the mutual friend whom everyone loves... orthe teacher whom everyone loves... orthe boss/co-workers whom everyone loves... orthe elder/po/elder's wife/po's wife whom everyone loves... orthe pioneer sister whom everyone loves... orthe young handsome ms whom everyone loves.... say something to you... that they wouldn't in a million years say to anyone else... or cop to when the matter is presented to them because they could not bear to have folks know they really think that way?

  so that when it all is brought forth, you are made to look like the trouble-maker because you said that such one said something they indeed did say... and yet, in the face of those who "love and respect" them, vehemently deny it?

  or have you had others, including perhaps one of those above, say you said something you didn't say, not necessarily because they misunderstood you, but more truthfully because they heard what they wanted to hear... rather than what you were saying... because their minds... and hearts... were in a whole different place... a place where they were trying to find something "against" you so that they could say, "aha!

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  dyan4help

  OH YEA.......

  Shortly after my husband died, late one night, my PO and a MS from my congregation came to my house. Both way too drunk to drive and had 2 6pks. of beer with them, and asked if I wanted some company. I have 2 young children who have not been around drunk people before so I made them sit on my front porch. For the next 2 hours the PO explained to me the trials of putting up with the kind of people we had in our congregation. He called them names, made fun of their problems and ended the night telling me what a bad sex life he has with his wife. He said they were soon going on vacation and wanted me and the kids to go. He said after his wife and the kids were asleep we could slip off for a while. The MS told me that a lot of men from our congregation were stuck in bad marriages and very unhappy. I told them it was too soon to think about another man. My husband wasn't dead that long. He left upset. The wife of the MS told other elders what happened and they asked me if it was true. I told them everything. The PO's wife came to my house very upset with me saying that I didn't realize what I was doing to her family.

  Dyan
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  6

  Justice #24b - Flock Book & Matt. 18

  by Amazing in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  the "flock" book recommends using matt.

  18, and in that i believe it to be correct, that is, if one is to follow christian principles ... but ... the hard realities of jw life do not lend themselves well to this application ... here is what the "flock: book states:applying jesus' counsel on handling certain wrongs.

  some accusations involve minor misunderstandings that should be handled on a personal basis.

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  dyan4help

  I know from personal experience. After having major problems with the PO of my congeration I went to other elders to ask for help. They in turn called the CO about the matter and he called me at home. He then met with the PO who said I was lying. The CO asked to meet with me with proof. I met with him and gave him the proof he needed that the PO was lying. After meeting with the PO again, the CO called me at home and said he caught the PO in a lie and that he would take care of the matter. I should do nothing but wait. After waiting 6 months I requested a meeting with the elders again. They said they thought the matter was over and settled. They asked me to wait while they looked into it again. After a while I asked for another meeting. This time I looked up the very scriptures you have here and the watchtower articles about lying and the problems I have with this PO, who by this time is no longer the PO. I printed about 10 pages of stuff from the watchtower CD and went before the elders. They handed me back the papers without even looking at them and said they did not care what was in them because they don't go by the rules that are laid out in the watchtower for people like me. They, meaning elders, have their own set of rules to go by. As far as they were concerned, the matter was over. And if I tried to take them to court, Jehovah would strike me dead for shaming his name. I am disfellowshipped........he is in good standing.

  Dyan
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  44

  JW Code and Silent Lambs

  by Goodboy in

  1. watchtower
  2. child-abuse

  i have been busy for the past few weeks and finally got around to reading the thread containing bill bowen's latest letter to the governing body.

  apparently the gb just locked the gates and ignored them.

  correct me if i'm wrong, i haven't dug through all the posts... .

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  dyan4help

  FXN ......

  Dyan
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  39

  vulture population rising

  by og in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  this is true!

  i heard it myself from a friend!

  scientists from all over the world are reporting unprecedented increases in vulture population - armageddon must be near!!!!!!!

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  dyan4help

  Maybe the vultures they are talking about don't have feathers !!

  Dyan
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  31

  Let's welcome my new friend---anyavnclv

  by Jesika in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  .

  i met her on another site, i won't say where but i just wanted everyone to say hi.. welcome anyavnclv.

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  dyan4help

  Hello anyavnclv,

  Add me to your now fast growing list of friends.........

  Dyan
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  56

  THE MOST OUTRAGEOUS THING SOMEBODY TOLD YOU

  by minimus in

  1. watchtower
  2. scandals

  what's the most outrageous thing that you were personally told ,while in the organization??

  ?

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  dyan4help

  I had gathered information on lying from the watchtower , printed up 3 copies for the 3 elders I asked to speak to. As I presented the papers to them, one elder looked at me and said this was a waste of time. He said I could research all I wanted to in the watchtowers, they are writtten for the congregation to read but the elders don't go by what is writted in them. They have their own set of books to go by. And that was the end of the meeting.

  Dyan
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  7

  Simon, Suicide & DF JW's thread

  by qwerty in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  after reading the thread (link below) about the df jw lad, it occured to me sites like this surely can help to save lives (sadly not in this example).

  it makes the blood boil to think the borg as ruined so many peoples families, responsibility lays with them for suicides!

  " http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/forum/thread.asp?id=30238&site=3&page=1"" http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/forum/thread.asp?id=30238&site=3&page=1".

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  dyan4help

  I also thank you Simon. This site is needed to link us all together and see us through something most people don't understand. This helps us to cope and move on.

  Dyan
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  38

  What was your crisis

  by JG in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  what was your crisis of conscience, moment of clarity, epiphany or realization?

  i am so interested in what got you thinking.

  blessing to you,.

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  dyan4help

  After 25 years as a witness, though not always an active witness, my husband passed away leaving me with two small children to raise. This was my crisis and I turned to the witnesses for comfort and support as I have no close family because I was a witness.My PO and his wife called me and came to my house and sat with me and the children at the hall to support me in my time of need. Then the life insurance check came and my PO asked me to invest the money in building our new kingdom hall and the society would give my money back. Then he brought me a contract, because that is how Jehovah wants money matters handled, but it was for him to borrow the money and he would have it back before the witnesses needed it. After he got the money he started showing up at my house with a 12 pack of beer under his arm making sexual advances towards me. Two other brothers got wind of this and they started visiting me too. Sometimes at the same time. We all sat on the front porch because my children were not used to people drinking and getting drunk around them. Anyway, a sister who lives up the street spotted the brothers at my house and word got back to the elders who called me in for a meeting. I was told to deny everything by the PO. I told everything. To make a long story short, I was told I would not get my money back, I told them I would sue, they said I could not do that to Jehovah's name. I ended up disfellowshipped. The PO had to step down and he filed bankrupcy on me. He was reproved and is in good standing. When I questioned the elders about his good standing, giving them bible verses about liers and theives and money matters and taking care of widows and the fatherless boys and showing them articles in the watchtowers about this, the new PO said to me that I could research all I want in the watchtowers and the bible, they don't go by these things. They have their own set of books and rules they use. So much for religion.

  Dyan