I can relate to your feelings also. I consider myself on the second journey of my life and as I peel the layers of Dubdom off I replace them with new experiences that I would have missed out on in my former life as a JW captive. I left in my late 30s and that is making me savor my freedom even more.
FreeGirl2006
JoinedPosts by FreeGirl2006
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70
Feeling sad over a wasted life in watchtower
by wannaexit init's been 12 years since i first read ray franz's books and the scales came off my eyes.
by that time i was in my forties.. since 2002 i went back to school and have worked with 3 very professional organizations.
but my biological clock is ticking away and while my peers are looking forward to retirement, i am only beginning.
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My messagew to my mother post "branch talk".
by problemaddict 2 inmy wife went out of curiosity.
she is out enough to where it doesn't affect our marriage, but she keeps it a secret from her family and others.
she is beginning to understand what it means to give over your thinking to an organization, and once she works that out there will be no going back.. so she went to the branch visit.
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FreeGirl2006
You sound very loving!
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ALERT: NEW LAWSUIT settlement - $13 MILLION
by Watchtower-Free inhttp://www.nbcsandiego.com/news/local/135m-awarded-to-bible-teacher-gonzalo-campos-alleged-abuse-victim-jose-lopez-281031832.html.
(published thursday, oct 30, 2014).
thursday, oct 30, 2014 updated at 11:58 pm pdt.
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FreeGirl2006
I just got off the phone with one of my sisters who is a dub. Not an uber one, but definitely entrenched. I got tricky with her--I brought up the topic of the breaking news by saying it brought up a lot of crap from our respective experiences with how the eldubs handled our abuse case (her father was an eldub and basically given a pass on my case since there were not 2 witnesses and he went on to abuse my two sisters and who knows how many other girls). I was able to do some subtle TTAT in the guise of having to off-load my emotional "trauma" and while she flipped into apologist mode I could tell I rattled her cage a bit.
I have to admit, all the current news about these cases does dredge some things up for me, but not to the extent I led my sister to believe. I just wanted to reach the authentic sister and make her think if only for a moment how bad things were for us and how her daughters could be in danger with the policies that are in place within the congregations.
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What I Miss
by FreeGirl2006 intoday i had to drive by several homes of dubs i knew most of my life and it kicked off a longing i have for my siblings and the faux-friends i grew up with.
not necessarily the people in and of themselves, but people who knew me way back when.
being raised in the borg the only "friends" i had were indoctrinated.
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FreeGirl2006
Today I had to drive by several homes of dubs I knew most of my life and it kicked off a longing I have for my siblings and the faux-friends I grew up with. Not necessarily the people in and of themselves, but people who knew me way back when. Being raised in the borg the only "friends" I had were indoctrinated. I really had no friends in school. I miss having people to walk down memory lane with, I miss sharing childhood tales of mischief with the sibs, being able to talk about my deceased mom with people who knew her. I have certainly moved on with my life and I have cobbled together a family and genuine friends, but I really can't reminesce with any of them. Just feeling the ache and loss tonight and this is one place where I know the vast majority can relate with empathy as well as sympathy.
I keep hope alive that maybe my siblings and nieces will snap out of the cult trance one day, but I temper that with the reality that they are followers rather than leaders.
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FreeGirl2006
Now she can be Basic Pioneer Barbie!
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Where Are You on The Witno Scale?
by tresdecu in1 - still think it's the truth ...came to this site cause danger is your middle name.. 2 - concerned, smoething's amiss but still believe.
3 - 98% sure it's bs, but still go for / with family.
4 - anger / denial, inactive with minimal attendance (ie memorial, spec talk etc).
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FreeGirl2006
I am a 5 but still must scrape off dried muck from when I was in (30+ long, unproductive years).
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New Awake! Dealing With Mental Illness
by runForever incontains a list of 9 practical steps except they forgot one: 10. do not become a jehovah's witness.. .
1. follow the treatment prescribed.
by qualified mental-health.
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FreeGirl2006
Was #1 even mentioned in that silly secret elder's video with prayer and cookies being the miraculous cure-all?
I know when I had my breakdown and followed my doctor's advice (umder no circumstances was I to meet with elders as the strain might push me to try suicide attempt as I was quite fragile) i was disfellowshipped in abstentia. No compassion or care shown in that shunning by my only friends and immediate family might aggravate the situation. Fortunately, they did me a favor and I was able to recover from my illness (Dubdom).
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CHECKLIST for JW's, almost JW'S and fading JW's
by Terry in1.the organization itself denies access to reality and substitutes its own version, interpretations and meanings.. a. only watchtower approved publications are allowed.. b. no higher education is to be pursued.. c. no non-jw friends or associations are encouraged with their "outside" points of view.. d. no free-style questioning of doctrine or criticism permitted.
curiousity is verboten.. e.t hreat of being "marked" or disassociated looms over them.
2.between every real-world event and the rank and file jw's mind is a roadblock.. a. the moment of identifying is short-circuited by an interpretive moment of re-labeling in watchtower-speak.. b. all things happening are forced into a narrow storyline and propagandized as end times happenings leading to armageddon.. ___________________.
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FreeGirl2006
Excellent observations!
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Reverse Shunning
by exwhyzee insometing happened yesterday that i thought might be noteworty enough to relate to you here.. mrs. eyz and i were invited to my new boss's home for his annual end of summer party.
it's a pretty big deal....his is a name known locally (i'll call him j.r.) a really nice interesting guy who's held a number of high level and politically connected jobs.
there was to be music, dancing, wine and reprotedly lots of well dressed, well educated, well to do and influential people (oh yes...and us) in attendance.. anyway we thought we'd make an occasion out of it and got ourselves spiffed up which involved new outfits and extra mirror time before we left home.
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FreeGirl2006
Loved! Absolutely brilliant.
Freegirl
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How do we set up a "Used New Bike Fund" for Terry?
by BucketShopBill inis there any way we can try to start a crowd-fund to help terry get some wheels quicker than he currently can?
with craigslist and a couple of bucks from a few members we can help terry get moving.
does anyone have any ideas how we can do a "theists for terry" bike fund raiser and challenge the atheists to a bucket-head challenge?
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FreeGirl2006
Seriously, if you don't want to donate-move along instead of getting your panties in a twist.
Coumt me in once you get the details together.
Freegirl