Posts by AllTimeJeff

16

How to fade successfully?

by Maddie in

jw
friends

i want to fade from the org but i am not really sure how many meetings i should miss to begin with.

is it best to decrease them gradually or go once a month?

i have a son and baby grand daughter that are jw's and belong to a different congregation.

Good for you! It is incredibly cruel how they enforce membership. I would say that within a month, you can start missing practically all meetings. Start off with the ones through the week first. Then miss the PT and WT last imo.

As a personal opinion for you if you will permit me: Your journey personally won't be easy at first. I would allow yourself to feel whatever you will feel, and to honor that. If you feel that you shouldn't be "feeling like this" that is incorrect imo. It is sad to realize that you have spent anytime in a cult. And there is some rebuilding to do. I wish you the best in that journey!

EDITED FOR PS: Excellent article by expabrit.

33

What's reasonable to expect on a first date?

by serendipity in

i've been on online dating sites for a while, have exchanged emails with over 100 guys (politely saying "thanks, but no thanks" to the vast majority) and went on dates with a few.

i'm generally disappointed in the emails these guys sent and have been disappointed in the dates.

i'm not sure if the problem is with my expectations or if there is just a lack of communications skills and courtesy among people.

AllTimeJeff

This guy is a loser.

I have made a deal with myself when I date. Because I do believe in chemistry and that you can't manufacture a friend or a lover, I agreed within myself that I would go home alone if it was obviously apparant to both of us that we are a good fit. It is hard when I don't want to be alone. But until I know I can trust my gut on a women, why would I put myself out for someone who won't meet my needs? Think about it, with your girlfriends, is it that hard to see who you will get along with and who you want to spend time with? Same applies in dating, imo.

This guy believes that DF'ing is the way to go? Throw him back into the shallow waters he comes from.

34

J.W= No beards-clean shaven, short hair...even Jesus???!!!

by Witness 007 in

do you remember all the publications in the 1950-1960's pictures showing a jesus clean shaven with short hair???.

watch.

1954 p.511 "why do watchtower books now show jesus with short hair and no beard?

AllTimeJeff

When you think about all of the prohibitions and principles that are in the bible, (and you can debate those) this "issue" is stupid in spades. It reveals just how controlling and unreasonable the GB is.

Our Circuit had a "problem" with a few brothers growing beards while I was in. At the CA, our CO illustrated how "distracting" a beard is by walking out on the platform wearing a 20 gallon cowboy hat. Then he reasoned that while the hat was nice and clean and that it was his right to wear it, it was "distracting". LOL Problems with this "reasoning" include that we grow hair, not hats. That their is NOTHING in the bible that would ever prohibit facial hair.

Since Paul highlighted how short hair was glory for man and long hair glory for women, wouldn't it stand to reason that a beard, which only a man can grow, would be to mans glory? I don't know...

Whew! It's not like there are bigger fish to fry for these morons.

27

I'm Still Receiving Teaching Assignments......That's Odd.

by R.F. in

i'm currently a ministerial servant, and i haven't been to a congregation meeting in almost 4 months.

my father, who brings me my magazines and kms, has informed me that i have parts on the tms and service meeting coming up soon.

what's the deal with that?.

AllTimeJeff

Welcome Idrnomo. I too was an elder and came to my conclusions through some amazing discoveries and realizations. The longer I am out, the more I can see just how indoctrinated I was.

RF, one thing I struggled with was the social aspect of it all. I left a lifetime of friends. I did it all at once. The reason I chose to handle it that way was knowing I was about to go into an emotional wilderness for a couple of years. At the end of it, I hope to be totally "clean" with no "tar" from my past. It isn't my intent to be an ex JW for the rest of my life. I want to live the rest of my life as a worldly person. They aren't nearly as evil or bad as portrayed....

Sounds like a fear of confrontation could be bothering you. If you have chosen the fade route, (a very honorable way to leave) just tell them you can't do it anymore. Be vague. Tell them emotionally it is too much while working, taking care of a family, etc...... That is the truth. As you fade, you will be astonished at how much more mental energy you will have by not doing the meetings 3 times a week, etc. And you won't have your impending "deletion" over your head....

All the best!

27

I'm Still Receiving Teaching Assignments......That's Odd.

by R.F. in

i'm currently a ministerial servant, and i haven't been to a congregation meeting in almost 4 months.

my father, who brings me my magazines and kms, has informed me that i have parts on the tms and service meeting coming up soon.

what's the deal with that?.

AllTimeJeff

Don't feel like you are being a bother or a bore. That is what this is here for.

I am not clear if you are trying to do the fade, want to stay in without the burden of "privileges" or if you plan on blowing the whole thing up all at once. (which is what I did) My suggestion is to resign if you know that within yourself. But do what you need to do!

Hang in there. It's tough sometimes....

24

Dating Service

by barj in

has anyone had success with singlesnet.com?

i am curious newly ousted jw whose interested in getting back in the dating world.

i was not raised as a jw, so i have some experience.

AllTimeJeff

LOL..... Interesting. I am open to any method to meet my match, but some of these dating services scare me. No one reads the profiles, and the pictures are dated. Did you know there are women who look like Drew Carey too?

Oh well. Best to let things come to you slowly then be in a hurry to get in a relationship that won't last.......

27

Is the "marking" policy of the Society defunct or still officially used?

by yaddayadda in

in my over 30 years as a jw, i honestly can't recall ever hearing about anyone who was being officially "marked" pursuant to the society's "marking" policy based on 2 thess 3:14. .

in fact, i havn't read anything about their strange "marking" policy in years.

this makes me wonder if the society still has confidence in it and still officially endorses it?

AllTimeJeff

Bad news. Marking still exists. There is a semi recent Questions from Readers and it is in the new "Organized" book. It won't die a silent death. It is useful in shaming people who are trying to think and act for themselves to get back into the herd.

37

Is this the BEST of all POSSIBLE WORLDS? Depends on this...!

by Terry in

if humanity were created by a supreme being who was essentially good wouldn't this be the best of all possible worlds?.

both adam and eve lacked what they desired most.

how is that the best of all possible worlds?.

AllTimeJeff

Oh I promised myself I wouldn't get involved in these, but, oh well....

Bravo Terry on your reasoning and use of logic. These aren't new arguements, but it does serve to reveal where thiests stand.

For those of you here arguing who are Christian and/or thiests but don't accept the bible or at least the Genesis account, I think it bears mentioning that while perhaps your individual views as to the allegory of Adam and Eve might differ substantially from most Christians, the fact remains that most Christians, and most denominations ACCEPT the allegory of Adam and Eve as the explanation for sin, mans fall from the "grace of god", and why since then god has chosen to not deal with his now unholy creation. (please excuse the run on sentence.)

Belief is just that. Belief. Little Toe debated me a while back and one point he made is that some people need their faith and belief. It isn't my intent to take that away. That isn't my point. However, it is a little disingenuous to answer a question with a question, thus changing the subject. If that is what one does best, why not start your own thread?

The point of using the Adam and Eve account as an example is to show how flawed the logic is, and how mythical all of the events are. If Christians wish to accept Jesus and the bible, yet pick and choose what seems plausible, as they seem to do, then the denominations of Christianity need to address this. But the official dogma is to accept all of the bible as the unerring word of god. Lets not be naieve here and pretend that in the USA that rather loud group doesn't exist, shall we?

I think the point is well made: IF GOD EXISTS THE WAY HE IS DESCRIBED, then he made flawed products and supplied insufficient data to his creation.

31

Ramblings and Questions of a tired Apostate

by horrible life in

god created adam and eve.

fill the earth, and become many.

live in paradise.

AllTimeJeff

LOL

If god owes us nothing, then we are even. I don't owe him anything either.

12

Inspection of Emotions 1919

by writetoknow in

inspection of emotions 1919. .

according to the teachings of jehovah witnesses starting somewhere around 1914 the first world war christ returned and upon his return he started the inspection of the modern day virgin class.

after a serve period of testing god chose his faithful and discreet slave class out of all religion on earth.

AllTimeJeff

I haven't read "Captives".... yet, but I will. I realized a long time ago that this is total bullshit. They explained it at Gilead. No chronology or scriptures, just "We received Christs authority then. Now kneel and kiss our rings...."

My one question about this whole thing: Would Christ really pick Rutherford to lead? A man who was a womanizing, bullying, mean, alcoholic? Does that make any sense?

No, it doesn't.