i don't post very often but i'm in need of some support.. i left my husband and the jw's back in the summer.
we have 3 kids and have joint custody of them.. i've spoken to my family once - back in the fall and it was a great conversation - my parents (dad is an elder) said that they just wanted me to be happy however that is.. last week i got a voicemail from my mom saying that she loved me and thought about me every day.
i was so happy.
there is no honourable way of leaving.
So true, and that is by design. It is a built in mechanism to ensure that anyone who leaves is always viewed as a deluded, selfish, Satan worshiping moron. It builds fear into the congregation, and tears you down as well.
The GB is insidious.
i don't post very often but i'm in need of some support.. i left my husband and the jw's back in the summer.
we have 3 kids and have joint custody of them.. i've spoken to my family once - back in the fall and it was a great conversation - my parents (dad is an elder) said that they just wanted me to be happy however that is.. last week i got a voicemail from my mom saying that she loved me and thought about me every day.
i was so happy.
Hit on the name of any poster here, it will take you to a screen where one of the buttons says "Send Message" Hit that and type away! :)
this post was motivated by another thread, namely.
http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/jw/friends/188552/1/onereason-for-a-gentleman-fader-to-stay-reasonably-associated.
this thread makes reference to the fact that a 40 something brother has a real chance with twenty-something and less sisters.
*sigh*
First of all, this does happen a lot. There are a lot of young sisters who want to hitch their wagons to an elder star and think of it as love. I can't help but think of my marriage to my ex. We both married each other WAY TO FREAKING YOUNG and we based that on the goals we thought we wanted at 17. And bigger then damn it, we actually reached them.
Which killed our marriage.
Ever notice that the best marriages in the borg are had by irregular/inactive ones? Because they actually devote their times to their families instead of the borg.
Sadly, there are a lot of deluded sisters who think that a happy marriage results from getting a borg approved brother, instead of doing it the old fashioned way, falling in love with someone who loves you and who gets along with you and likes the same things you do.
In this, the GB is absolutely culpable for the many bad marriages that exist among JW's.
i don't post very often but i'm in need of some support.. i left my husband and the jw's back in the summer.
we have 3 kids and have joint custody of them.. i've spoken to my family once - back in the fall and it was a great conversation - my parents (dad is an elder) said that they just wanted me to be happy however that is.. last week i got a voicemail from my mom saying that she loved me and thought about me every day.
i was so happy.
You aren't the first one who slept with someone else because that was the best way they knew at the time to end a sham JW marriage. As long as you know why you did it, that is most important. Otherwise, I like the idea of a letter if you do it for your peace of mind. Don't do it to justify your actions though. You have nothing to be defensive about. Remember too that they are trained to react, not to think. They are indoctrinated, which is why any attempts at explanation or defense are futile.
I know this might sound trite, but the best way to get through to them is your happiness and healthy living. It is the one weakness of the GB argument about those that leave. They insist we are evil and unhappy. So be good, positive, and happy. That will ultimately show them. And it will be the best thing for your kids to see.
i don't post very often but i'm in need of some support.. i left my husband and the jw's back in the summer.
we have 3 kids and have joint custody of them.. i've spoken to my family once - back in the fall and it was a great conversation - my parents (dad is an elder) said that they just wanted me to be happy however that is.. last week i got a voicemail from my mom saying that she loved me and thought about me every day.
i was so happy.
If you are depending on your family with the expectation that they will accept you and as a result, you will be happy, then its possible that will not change.
I have the same issues with some in my family. I am here for them, but if they are going to accept the indoctrination over their family, I am not going to chase them around. It's bad for your mental health to do so.
It does get better, but the fact is, family, esp where kids are concerned, along with JW relatives, will always cause upset. Set good boundaries for yourself. You are allowed to do whats best for you as well.....
Wishing you the best!
*** w90 5/15 pp.
11-12 fear jehovah, the hearer of prayer ***.
a restricted privilege.
Sorry mythbuster, my sarcasm didn't translate. Yes, they still think that way. This also makes them idiots in a way that could cause another definition of "idiot" to be made....
They are pretty blunt at times. In spite of their efforts to nicen their appearnance, they are hard core control artists.
i disagree on some doctrine with the organisation.
yet, i also know these are the kindest,most loving people on earth.
such people must be guided by the holy spirit.
Outlaw, I lived in Michigan for 10 years. We were waiting for you dam Canucks to annex the state! Eh?
i disagree on some doctrine with the organisation.
yet, i also know these are the kindest,most loving people on earth.
such people must be guided by the holy spirit.
It wasn't this one Outlaw... Seriously. There was one weirder then this...
I do like Molson Golden. Thats good stuff...
Babies resulting from this thread will be politically conflicted monkeys with short tempers and will tear your face off, who like banana's, support campaign finance reform, oppose abortion personally but allow free choice and dig mouthy chicks. They also want to balance the budget while cutting taxes.
Wait, John McCain already exists. Never mind....
Lovers, in a snowy time....
