Hi there. I went through the same thing with my ex JW wife. I totally understand. When we got back from our missionary assignment because of some bad stuff that happened to me, she went around at the next CA telling everyone that she feels like she just lost a child. (mind you, she never had kids, and it was totally disrespectful of those that had that happen) But thats the kind of nutcase JW's breed.
It's been two years for you, and there is no doubt, as you are a former elder and know, that she is being coached. I have no answers. You don't have to do what I did, but at the same time, you do need to take care of yourself and be realistic and pragmatic.
I sent you a PM.
Wish you the best my brother.