Posts by jamiebowers

41

Letter from my mother

by Las Malvinas son Argentinas in

jw
friends

i've been officially disowned.

translated from the original:.

"my daughter,.

jamiebowers

I was attending meetings and hoping to reverse my disfellowshipping for reasons on convenience, but now I'm seriously reconsidering it.
This is simply too high a price to regain something that is broken anyway. I'll never be looked at the same.

Exactly!

You don't have to answer this, because it's strictly no one's business, but I hope the baby you're carrying doesn't belong to your jw ex-husband! If it is, be prepared for a nasty fight. When are you going to live with your dad? Isn't he in a different country? I hope you get as far away from that whole jw scene as fast as you can!

41

Letter from my mother

by Las Malvinas son Argentinas in

jw
friends

i've been officially disowned.

translated from the original:.

"my daughter,.

jamiebowers

I'm sorry you experienced such pain, but it is a good lesson learned. People under mind control are dangerous. Now you know that it isn't good for you to be around your mother, and it won't be good for your baby either.

25

Young Ex-JW siblings release song to radio inspired by their experience leaving the cult.

by Azazel in

this is a must see for all ex-jws and those thinking of leaving.

watch for the subtle clues in the video.

lets get this get this out there.. .

jamiebowers

This could be the theme song for ex and exiting jws! What a couple of talented kids!

65

need your advice again, please

by outsmartthesystem in

jw
friends

so here's the latest in my pathetic saga.

i've tried to fly under the radar for the past year, but it isn't working so well.

i've learned not to engage my wife in debates but rather to ask questions.

jamiebowers

Ynot:

With all due respect Jamie....

Unless he gets sole custody...(but even then it would be a battle because the kids are already JW-indoctrinated)

He could lose them forever to even stricter JW thinking since their mother will feel even more compelled to 'protect' them from him/world via indoctrination.

His lil 5 year old's comments show she is already quite able to 'make a stand for Jehovah' and that sort of dedication at that age (minus coaching as his wife denies) is a very strong indication that she would resist him and probably blame him.

I was a little uberite-JWchild similar (but probably more hardcore) to what he describes of his 5 year old's comments.

He can win his child's trust back far faster and easier than his wife and begin to gently teach her the critical thinking skills.

Best to let the fire die to embers instead of intensifying them when it can be avoided.......if not he will only end up in divorce court and the kids will become pawns for the rest of their childhood (if not the rest his life).

Again the WTS is betting heavy on his giving up, becoming indignant or self-destructing.

Please see this thread: http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/jw/friends/230187/2/and-a-new-wrinkle

41

....and a new wrinkle

by outsmartthesystem in

jw
friends

so i was giving my daughter a hug at bed time last night.

she stands up at the foot of her bed and wraps her arms around my neck.

she then asks why i don't serve jehovah anymore.

jamiebowers

Ynot:

His 5 year old first need is for stability in their home.

You might noticed I mentioned his wife and his daughter not trusting him.....

While his wife will more than likely be wary for several months, his child will probably be ready to follow his gentle lead within a week or two (maybe less if she has been a 'daddy's girl').

I believe I saw on the other thread he said he had ordered "Teach Your Children How to Think".

It is far easier to begin teaching such if he remains married to their mother.....

If he doesn't go back (or at least appear to be trying) he will remain suspect to some extent.

I have seen JW children dismiss their unbelieving parents ......his daughter very well might be the type to go that route because she feels in her heart that is the right thing to do......

His wife is already showing some classic reactions...... pushing these buttons will only lead to more division and disharmony....and all the 5 year old is going to discern is 'its daddy's fault because daddy doesn't love and obey Jehovah and he is trying to get me to do it too" ....daddy is already cast as an 'enemy of Jehovah' in her mind.....so falling back, recreating trust allows him to replace that negativity in her mind and allows him the opportunity to lead her to critical thinking and knowing her daddy loves her, he is trustworthy, stable, predictable and strong .....he keeps her safe....daddy isn't the 'bad guy'.

It seems to me that going back is not an option for him. Again, the Watch Tower isn't God, nor does it have the strength of the law of the land. Both Anon ymous and Mamalove have custodial agreements that legally bind the jw parent not to attempt to alienate the ex-jw parent. Hopefully this will become a growing trend. But the OP will never know if he has this possibility until he consults an attorney.

IMO, protecting the kids is the goal here. Pussyfooting around a cult isn't going to help them. Taking a stand by teaching the kids critical thinking skills and giving them an opportunity to experience the real world is the only way to help them out of the indocrination.

41

....and a new wrinkle

by outsmartthesystem in

jw
friends

so i was giving my daughter a hug at bed time last night.

she stands up at the foot of her bed and wraps her arms around my neck.

she then asks why i don't serve jehovah anymore.

jamiebowers

Again, Ynot, with all due respect, his kids are getting older and more indoctrinated by the minute. Asking a five-year old questions about her declarations is the best way to begin teaching her critical thinking skills.

29

Did You Have A Lot Of Meetings With The Elders?

by minimus in

jw
friends

we're you always in the back room with the elders?.

jamiebowers

I don't remember the exact number, but it was more than a few. I wasn't called to the back room. It was either me or my crazy jw ex-husband going to the elders about his strange and violent behavior like buying porn magazines, performing autofelatio, and beating me and threatening my life. He was counseled to control himself, and I was told to be a better wife.

375

The Governing Body intends to announce significant changes in academic literature (DOCTRINES) - Brazil

by Dogpatch in

jw
friends

dear randall.

good morning!.

here is the daniel of brazil (former bethel).. this week at the forum of former jehovah's witnesses had an interesting news!

jamiebowers

The change isn't related to d2d. See the August 1 2012 BOE letter posted by Atlantis. The letter dictates aux pio hours and how to work territory in March 2013.

Then why is the elders meeting being held in order for them to learn how to help the rank and file with significant changes?

65

need your advice again, please

by outsmartthesystem in

jw
friends

so here's the latest in my pathetic saga.

i've tried to fly under the radar for the past year, but it isn't working so well.

i've learned not to engage my wife in debates but rather to ask questions.

jamiebowers

Do you really think she could/would win full custody? I am a good dad. I have a lot of people in my industry and my community that would have my back. You really think they might give her FULL custody? What would she have against me in order to get such a result?

These questions are exactly the reason you should get the JW Child Custody book and get to an attorney now. You'll get a good idea what your chances are of gettting at least joint custody with the ability to make educational and medical decisions for your kids.

Ynot, with all due respect, his kids are getting older by the minute. He doesn't have time to go back in, and quite frankly, it doesn't seem that he'd be able to do that anyway. The Watch Tower is a cult; it is not God. It and its congregants must obey the law of the land, and that's why he should be getting legal advice.

65

need your advice again, please

by outsmartthesystem in

jw
friends

so here's the latest in my pathetic saga.

i've tried to fly under the radar for the past year, but it isn't working so well.

i've learned not to engage my wife in debates but rather to ask questions.

jamiebowers

Jamie Bowers:

"The first thing I think you should do is consult a very good divorce and child custody attorney who is either willing to learn about or able to handle jw issues just to have her/him at the ready in case the worst happens. Second, start exposing your kids to crirical thinking skills and the real world NOW! Third, reiterate to your wife how her social standing will be ruined if/when you're df'd and ask her to compare you being shunned with how her father was treated by her grandfather."

OutsmarttheSystem:

I've considered that. I haven't brought myself to do it yet because mentally, I fell like once I've done that.....I've officially thrown in the towel. I've just ordered "Teach Your Children How to Think". I will reiterate how her social life will change.....but she won't care. She is a different kind of person. She has never had many friends because she wears her emotions on her sleeve and gives it to you straight up. There is no sugar coating with her. If she believes in something.....she'll go after it - detractors be damned. She doesn't care what people think. So her response to me when I tell her about the potential change in her social life will be "I don't care. If I were in your shoes and I thought MY religion was wrong.....I'd have been knocking on the door of Bethel a long time ago."

Think of it this way...buying a home security system doesn't mean you're resigned to the fact that your house is going to be burgalarized. Using birth control doesn't mean you're never going to have children. These things are protections, just as consulting an attorney is. If she doesn't care about what her social life would be like or how people view her if you are df'd, then all the better for you. You being df'd for having questions may be the only thing that will help her see the truth about the "truth".