Posts by still

70

How to make love & marriage work w/a JW

by StillinLove in

please dont comment saying to "run" or "get out while i can" thank you im not new to this, so i can handel it.

i have been with my boyfriend for 3 years, we started dating in high school and now i am going to college and he is working.

i am 20 and he is 21, i was raised catholic but my mom and i are too open minded for the church so we left.

still_in74

He is a JW, him and his friends had always dated (almost always worldly girls) and hid it from thier parents and their congregation.
I know that he always wanted me to convert and tried to get me to and he always will, but when we discuss religion (which is often) I am never swayed and he has gotten used to it.
And as he explained it; life would be much easier for us if we were both JW and obviously he would want me to be one b/c of his beleif about paradise earth.
So my concerns are; his religousness has made him incredibly small minded in certain ways and I am concerned about how that will affect our ability to raise kids.
I am totally fine with them being raised as witnesses because he is an incredible person with strong values from his faith and I am not religous so I know that it is more important to him than me. BUT i do however want my kids to learn about other cultures, make friends with whoever they want, be allowed to date, and not ever be put in a position where they have to lie like he always has.
The other issue is that from what I know (which is alot at this point) from him and the watchtower website they are pretty sexist. “My husband exercises his headship in a loving and kind way,” says Susan. “We usually discuss decisions, and when he decides what will or will not be done, I know it is for our benefit. Jehovah’s arrangement for Christian wives really makes me happy" is from the website and pretty much says it all. I am incredibly headstrong and dont give a damn what the bible says because I dont follow it, so I wont be following that model. Problem being: how do I get him to understand that Im not that kind of woman and dont want to be? I want to get him to realize that we need to be able to work together as equals and he needs to back down on that one? He understands my side but says "thats what the bible says so..." so my question is how do i get him to get over that and compermise?

Hi and welcome to the board. as for your situation - my mother was a JW and my father was not. This caused some tension between my mother and her in-laws but she was very stubborn and controlling. Had she been a little more "flexible" with them it may not have been as difficult.
As for my parents, they seemed to be alright although my father was pretty easy going. He also enjoyed the company of the JW's in the cong. and they all like him - so that helped.
This division certainly caused more tension for my mother as she was always playing the "unbelieving husband" card and always trying to get him to convert. She eventually resented the fact he would not become a JW but then things settled down once us kids were all older. But certainly the home environment was not one I would want for my children - I did not like being around the house.

As for your comments above - regarding kids sneaking around - some do/did but not all. Many of us (like myself) actually were pretty good in this area, although now I regret not having a bit more fun in my youth when I had an excuse for doing it! Regarding kids, i know many kids that were raised in similar households. They tend to take "the truth", or go the other direction but maintane many of their JW friends as they had never been baptized. This actually works well for them as they get the best of both worlds. This of course is for children that are confident in themselves and do not have self-esteem issues. If so, then they may struggle with feelings of worthlessness. I myself am fearful to have children as my wife is an active JW and I am still-in but no longer recognize the WTS as gods chosen channel. Regarding the org being sexist. Those articles are written by old men!Almost EVERYONE knows that that is not the real world. Husbands and wives typically find a system that works for them. Most husbands know that the "loving your wife as you love yourself" bit is where it really counts. Husbands that "dominate" their wives are usually the ones the most people dont like to be around. Often the wives are noticabley different from the rest. Those marriages tend to fail. Your husband actually sounds more open minded than you think. You should really get settled into your "religious" paths before bringing children into the mix - at least this way you both know where stand in that regard and it will be less frustrating for them. Certainly though - this type of childhood is frustrating - I know, I lived it. Best of luck Still..................

35

Hello

by annalesia in

jw
friends

just popping in to introduce myself, i am an exjw of 45 years and am looking forward to getting to know you.

i'm new to the internet so bear with me .

x. anne.

still_in74

Hello and welcome...

looking forward to a bit more of an introduction once you get settled in.

Curious to know what was going on in the org in 1961 that triggered your leave...............

6

Re: Annual Meeting-New Understanding Of Leaven At Matt. 13:33?

by Justitia Themis in

this was posted on another db.

has anyone heard this?.

brother barr gave a talk on 4 new understandings.. .

still_in74

*** it-2p.230Leaven ***
Because of the negative aspects associated with leaven, Jesus evidently had in mind corrupting elements when he said: "The kingdom of the heavens is like leaven, which a woman took and hid in three large measures of flour, until the whole mass was fermented." (Mt 13:33; Lu 13:20, 21) The Scriptures do indicate that corruption of truth would be brought about by individuals professing to be in line for membership in the heavenly Kingdom.—Ac 20:29, 30; 1Ti 4:1-3.

I hadn't heard of this "new light". We used to study a little brown book about the Kingdom, and it explained that the leaven that helped the bread rise was corruption and apostasy from true Christianity

*** w983/1p.12FestivalMilestonesofIsrael’sHistory ***
That means being constantly on the watch for figurative leaven. Leaven is used in the Bible to picture corrupt teachings, hypocrisy, and badness. True worshipers of Jehovah must show a hatred of such leaven, not allowing it to corrupt their own lives and not allowing it to spoil the purity of the Christian congregation.—1 Corinthians 5:6-8; Matthew 16:6, 12.

HOW IS THIS NEW LIGHT???? HOW COULD THIS NOT HAVE BEEN CLEAR FOR ALL THIS TIME??? The scripture clearly reads - "The kingdom of the heavens is like leaven" So why did the WTS say "True worshipers of Jehovah must show a hatred of such leaven" - thus implying that the flour is the kingdom of heaven that was corrupted?

23

The reason for the change, my opinion.

by joebin in

i think the decision was made because elders were starting to really feel the pinch and maybe many were considering giving their resignation due to the heavy workload involved.

with the new arrangement, not only do they have one less meeting to get ready for a week but also less preparation for the remaining ones.

i don't think the org can afford to lose too many elders.

still_in74

I think the decision was made because elders were starting to really feel the pinch and maybe many were considering giving their resignation due to the heavy workload involved. With the new arrangement, not only do they have one less meeting to get ready for a week but also less preparation for the remaining ones. I don't think the org can afford to lose too many elders.
I'm happy for all of them that somehow they finally got a little slack.

i made a similar comment in another thread. i agree. They need elders and they need to retain elders. Our DO talked about this at recent assembly. 20,000 new elders needed every year! Not likely with all the young boys leaving as soon as they turn 18....

20

More "new light"? Has anyone got the July 15th WT yet?

by slimboyfat in

i hear there is more "new light" in this magazine.

nothing as big as the "generation" change or scrapping 1935 for the annointed.

it might be something to do with some of jesus' parables.

still_in74

This has got to be the biggest circle jerk cult in the world

at least the meetings would be more intersting this way.....

20

More "new light"? Has anyone got the July 15th WT yet?

by slimboyfat in

i hear there is more "new light" in this magazine.

nothing as big as the "generation" change or scrapping 1935 for the annointed.

it might be something to do with some of jesus' parables.

still_in74

"And now, having just studied that article we have just received the WT July 15 which contains a refined understanding of Jesus' illustrations of the "dragnet" and the Kingdom of the heavens being like a "mustard seed" and "leaven". These again contain dramatic changes in understanding of these illustrations of Jesus."

this was mentioned at the annual talk that these were changing. I have notes at home from that talk but I dont recall that the speaker actually went into details. I will check.

My latest insight was in the June 15 WT - the 2nd last article near the end - "we have good reason to uprootany sign of ambition in our lives"

Yes they actually said that. Unbeleivable.

60

Well I'm Out!!!!

by ImFreeatlast in

it took a long time, but i can finally say i'm out and i took my family with me.. this is my first post but i have been reading here for a while.

i was brought up a witness, in a family that was very 'strong' (or so everyone thought).

i didnt have a relationship with my perents at all other than the 'family study'.

still_in74

I managed to get my wife to see reality and then we successfully managed to fade while living next door to an elder (Im proud of that bit). We havent been to a meeting for 2 years now and are celebrating xmas and birthdays with our girls, and my wife's family still associates with her. While it may come crashing down at some point, at this stage it is looking good.

please do not apologize -your post wasnt long enough!! please elaborate on how you pulled this off?

Very curious!!

thanks,

221

Watchtower Comments THE GENERATION CHANGE Featuring LEOLAIA

by V in

still_in74

The sémeion "sign" that the disciples ask for in Matthew 24:3 is the logical antecedent of the sémeion "sign" that is mentioned as accompanying the coming of the Son of Man in v. 30. It would ignore a most basic principle in hermeneutics to ignore this lexical connection and look for the "sign" elsewhere (as the Society does, highlighting the material in v. 6-8 as encompassing a "composite sign", despite the fact that the text denies that the events in v. 6-8 indicate that the end is close), unless there is a very good reason for doing so. The connection between the two is even closer since both instances of sémeion in the discourse represent Matthean redactions of the Markan text (compare with Mark 13:4, 26). Moreover, the text shows that the sign in v. 30 is a highly visible (cf. the use of phainó in the verse) occurrence that would be seen by all the tribes of the earth and which would herald the arrival of the Son of Man, which is related in the very next sentence.
The use of sémeion with parousia suggests the disciples were seeking a sign to let them know when to prepare for the parousia, like the people of a city who would dress up in white robes and prepare festivities to welcome the arriving king or dignitary. Jesus essentially tells them that there would be no advance warning than the epiphany of the arrival itself, so they should always be prepared in case it happens at a time they do not expect. Indeed, if you consult the wider Greek literature, you can see that forms of sémeion occur with parousia to refer to an advance warning that an arrival is due to occur.

Excellent, thank you. Your first paragraph outlines exactly what I was thinking regarding the first and second occurence of "sign" (albeit your words are much more effective and to the point than I would use!) The WTS seeks to inidicate 2 signs when the point of the discussion is one sign, of which the answer is give in v30.

Your 2nd paragraph answers well as to why they inquired of a sign when they expected a visible return. Thanks for the crystal clear explanation. I look forward to examining this further in your later posts within this thread.

Thanks to both boyzone and Leolaia - I dont believe I have ever examined this passage in such detail. I feel even further that my eyes are being opened and scriptures make so much more sense when you take them for what they are!

Still.............

221

Watchtower Comments THE GENERATION CHANGE Featuring LEOLAIA

by V in

still_in74

They wanted to be sure they recognized him then. But not yet having received holy spirit, they did not appreciate that he would not sit on an earthly throne; they had no idea that he would rule as a glorious spirit from the heavens and therefore did not know that his second presence would be invisible." WT 64 9/15 QFR
If this is the case, then the context of Matt 24 leads us to ask why were the disciples asking for a sign if they thought Jesus was going to be visible? They'd be able to literally see him, no need for a sign.
But if they were asking "what would be the sign of your COMING, (ARRIVAL, ADVENT)?" Then you can see the need for a sign.
Jesus then gives the sign at Matt 24 v 30

I am a bit confused with this one...

are you suggesting that the disciples did anticipate an invisible presence/coming and that is why they asked for a sign? Why would this be different when asking for a sign of his coming vs a presence?
If asking for a sign of his coming is necessary then your prior reasoning would suggest that the disciples would have believed his coming to be invisible also...

67

Announcement: They Clapped!

by metatron in

jw
friends

weird.

after the letter was read, many clapped.

i don't know how to interpret that.. .

still_in74

we had an old pioneer sister start to clap.. it was like a slow clap in a teen movie, others started and then it stopped. I couldnt believe it..

To me, this old sister would be of the opinion that this letter was basically written by Jehovah himself and how greatful we are to here it. I mean , why wouldnt you clap - Jehovah loves us sooo much that he's reducing the weekly requirement to gather ourselves together!

still_in74

Posts by still_in74