part of my story is posted on the main board ..very long. mostly that is about my personal feelings and turmoil. i will post one day soon about the problems i have with the orgs doctrins ect. its definatley different when you are baptized.
Posts by flower
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35Why did you leave the society??
by sadiejive inthe subject is pretty cut and dry:.
---why did you leave the society??---.
was it one thing or several?
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40
WILL I BE DISFELLOWSHIPPED?
by jazz inmy wife went into my email and found out i have been looking at porn and chatting with other women she went to the elders and told them i go before them on sunday.
what do you think my fate will be
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flower
if you refuse to meet with them at all you will eventually be disfellowshiped..thats a guarantee.
i dont see any way you are going to get around at least getting reproved. and unless you go in there and say it was just some kind of weak moment and you've been riddled with guilt and will never do it again, they will probably disfellowship you. i think if you show any kind of 'what i do is my business' type attitude you are definately gone. you really cant lie because your wife will simply tell on you again if she catches you so i dont see anyway you can not get df'd.
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13
happy memories of my father
by refiners fire insomething that happened with an ex dub friend of mine prompted this post.he finally wrote a letter to his elder father telling him how he really felt.i read the assorted corespondences.. in the letter to his father my friend mentioned that he could only remember 1 instance where father and son spent quality time together.. they spent an afternoon (1 afternoon)flying a kite down at the park.. that was the only pleasure incident he could remember with his dad.. i wept and wept reading that.
for it reminded me of my own dad.. i could barely remember any pleasure incidents either.. my father and i went on 3 camping trips, when i was a teenager.. we did that together.
all the rest of my memories were of him compelling me to do things i didnt want to do.. this causes me to wonder if this is a phenomena unique to the dubs.. no memory of quality time spent with your dad.
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flower
Sorry Andi. sounds like things would have been great for you if he never joined. i'm really sorry,
flower
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13
happy memories of my father
by refiners fire insomething that happened with an ex dub friend of mine prompted this post.he finally wrote a letter to his elder father telling him how he really felt.i read the assorted corespondences.. in the letter to his father my friend mentioned that he could only remember 1 instance where father and son spent quality time together.. they spent an afternoon (1 afternoon)flying a kite down at the park.. that was the only pleasure incident he could remember with his dad.. i wept and wept reading that.
for it reminded me of my own dad.. i could barely remember any pleasure incidents either.. my father and i went on 3 camping trips, when i was a teenager.. we did that together.
all the rest of my memories were of him compelling me to do things i didnt want to do.. this causes me to wonder if this is a phenomena unique to the dubs.. no memory of quality time spent with your dad.
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flower
another human being as long as i live
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13
happy memories of my father
by refiners fire insomething that happened with an ex dub friend of mine prompted this post.he finally wrote a letter to his elder father telling him how he really felt.i read the assorted corespondences.. in the letter to his father my friend mentioned that he could only remember 1 instance where father and son spent quality time together.. they spent an afternoon (1 afternoon)flying a kite down at the park.. that was the only pleasure incident he could remember with his dad.. i wept and wept reading that.
for it reminded me of my own dad.. i could barely remember any pleasure incidents either.. my father and i went on 3 camping trips, when i was a teenager.. we did that together.
all the rest of my memories were of him compelling me to do things i didnt want to do.. this causes me to wonder if this is a phenomena unique to the dubs.. no memory of quality time spent with your dad.
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flower
to trust
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flower
no longer trust
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12
Fear of Worldly People
by ItsJustMe inanyone else felt uncomfortable, awkward, wary, unsure, frightened, distraught, when around worldly people?
afraid they were going to try to seduce you, offer you drugs, get you drunk, kill you, etc?.
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flower
actually i feel uncomfortable, awkward, wary, unsure, frightened, distraught, when around my JW family.
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20
I dont remember the date I was baptized....
by flower inyou know how at every baptismal talk they say to the candidates that they should 'make a note of this date june, 4 whatever..ect'?
and everyone knows that date for like the rest of their life?
well i dont remember when i was baptized.
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flower
badwillie,
my son is 2 and will be 3 next august. i only have one son the other child on the site is my nephew and i think there is a picture of my neice as well. it been a while since i've updated the site so i dont remember.
i was reading some of the excepts from Brother Franz's book last night as was just amazed and in awe. I cant wait to get the book and read it. i'm in jersey btw, are you in pa?
flower
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14
A twisted Irony and a question ......
by flower ini know ya'll will probably get sick of seeing my name but i hope you understand why i am here so much.. anyway, one really ironic thing i was thinking about is that its amazing how much hate i had/have inside of me my whole life.
hate my father, my sister.
i have always been angry and hated people.
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flower
I know ya'll will probably get sick of seeing my name but I hope you understand why I am here so much.
Anyway, one really ironic thing I was thinking about is that its amazing how much hate I had/have inside of me my whole life. Hate my father, my sister. I have always been angry and hated people. I never really treated people bad but I felt the hatred inside when people were mean to me or I crossed paths with people I didnt like. The ironic thing is now that I am out of the org I am starting to be able to let go of the anger and hatred and negative feelings I have always felt. I've got a long way to go but its amazing that its not until after leaving the org which is supposedly the loving organization who follows christs lead in caring for the flock with love. Everything is love, love, love. But I never felt love from anyone there. EVER EVER EVER. My mother I know loved us growing up and she told me once or twice that she loved me but that was it. Its not until leaving that I see love and release the hate. just thought it was ironic.
my question has to do with how some of you have dealt with getting back together with old friends and relatives that you were cut off from because you were a witness. i have aunts who left the org when i was very young and cousins and others who i never got to know. even just my three brothers who left the org years ago. i dont know how to even approach them and talk to them again. its something that seems so simple but i'm wondering how you all handled those first conversations?
flower
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20
I dont remember the date I was baptized....
by flower inyou know how at every baptismal talk they say to the candidates that they should 'make a note of this date june, 4 whatever..ect'?
and everyone knows that date for like the rest of their life?
well i dont remember when i was baptized.
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flower
you know how at every baptismal talk they say to the candidates that they should 'make a note of this date June, 4 whatever..ect'? and everyone knows that date for like the rest of their life?
well i dont remember when i was baptized. i never never made a note of it and simply forgot over time. i know i was when i was around 17 or 18. being born in the org it there always came a point where you had to get baptized or there was something wrong with you. for most of us it was around the time we graduated from hs that we felt we couldnt hold out anymore without getting questioned as to why we werent baptized yet so we did it. i never understood what they meant though when they said we were supposed to have some kind of personal relationship with Jehovah in which we were to give ourselves over to him (i cant remember what they called that first step). i never felt anything special when i decided to get baptized. i just memorized the answers to the questions they ask and did it.
anyway, i cant for the life of me remember the date or year. but one thing is for sure Dec 25 2001 is a date that i will not likely ever forget. its the date i found this site. its the date i realized that there is hope for me and my son. its the date i began my healing and it was one of the, if not 'the' happiest day of my life.
flower