<<< I have to agree with the majority. I wouldn't dare want to identify myself as an ex-JW. Heck, and that's coming from someone still active.>>> Dear RH, What I forgot to say in my last post (51 year old with failing short-term memory) was this. . .there shouldn't be any shame in all of this. I can tell that some of you feel ashamed by stating that you would NEVER admit you were a JW or maybe still are or are sitting on the proverbial fence about it. If you were raised in it, like I was, you didn't have a choice. When you're a child your world is your parents, they are supposed to be there to protect you and do the right things for you to get you to adulthood so you can make good decisions and go on with life. You didn't have a choice in the matter - you loved your parents as a child and didn't know anything else (until you got in school, of course, and realized how different you were). But in any case. . .that was what you were handed in life as a child. There's no shame in that. .. you didn't chose it . . it was choosen for you. My parents have told me, "we did what we thought was best for you". Okay. . .so be it. . .perhaps they did. They are still faithful witnesses, so I'm sure that's what they believe in their hearts. Are they wrong? I think so, but that's my decision to make now as an adult. If you got into it as an adult. . .the way I see it is you were searching for something. They tell some good stories that are appealing to someone who is "searching" for something in life. . .answers to things. . .they paint a pretty picture. Where's the shame in that? You were honestly searching for something and you thought "hey, maybe this is what I'm looking for". They can be very friendly and welcoming and compassionate to get you in the "fold". If that's the way it happened, then don't feel ashamed or feel like "I'm intelligent, I should have known better". There's no shame in making a wrong decision - hell we all do it at one point or another. That's how we learn. . and then we pick ourselves up and we say. . "boy, that was a dumb move I better correct my course. I felt ashamed too. . .but I don't anymore. No matter how you got into it. . .by birth, as a child, or as an adult. . .it made you who you are today. Everything we go thru. .whether suffering, pain, happiness, exploration, etc.. . .makes us who we are. I just look at the wonderful people who are on these email sites. .the help and encouragement you give to each other. . .the times you give the laughs out. . .the way you share your stories so freely and willingly with each other and always reach out to help. . .and I see people who should be okay with who they are because they are A.O.K. people. The other group "philia" saved me, opened me up and helped me be not ashamed of who I was. . .I hope this place does the same for all of you. Now. . off to work. . . Dawn