Self sacrifice without some romantic love in a marriage sounds like cardboard.
So why create a "cardboard marriage" (one without romantic love )
.....where you will grow resentful ?
caliber
JoinedPosts by caliber
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caliber
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caliber
The spirit of self sacrifice.
.... good point" if you're in a very good relationship, a happy one that is the right one, resentment (self-sacrifice ) will never be a problem. You don't think twice about give and take. It happens naturally" ( a very close friends quote but I like it and believe it to be very true )
A happy relationship is one that begins and ends in love
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caliber
What is the spirit that fuels a happy marriage if is not romantic love ?
what is the spirit
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caliber
Is it an illusion to believe you will be happy , if you marry for any reason other than love ?
Can you fake happiness for a whole lifetime of marriage ? Can love and happiness exist apart from each other ...
would this not be living an illusion ?
Would "fake love" be equivalent to "settling" ?
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caliber
True love is never a mistake. ...it is a certified feeling deep in your very being !!
settling " . A lot of people do it - but it's not really healthy in the long run mentally, emotionally, or physically - Flipper
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caliber
All in all, the mate who was left behind should understand that it's not his or her fault that his partner wasn't in love.
In hindsight wouldn't it have been better still for the departing mate to "understand" that in order to have a true , commited & lasting marriage
you need romantic love to begin with...... To allow each one the opportunity to fall madly in love with each other ?
A stolen heart is not easy to recover ! "Settling" in the end will hurt everyone !
The "in love "kind of love, that level of attraction, it's not something anyone can create. It's either there or it isn't. We cannot force ourselves or anyone else to "fall in love."
So it beggs the question , so how did a person expect to "create" a happy lasting marriage without romantic love ?
All in all, the mate who was left behind should understand that it's not his or her fault that his partner wasn't in love.
then , who is at fault ?
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In love with a JW...
by CuriousUK inapologies if this has been discussed before, or is in the wrong forum, but i could really do with some advice.
two years ago i met the love of my life; someone i regard as my soulmate.
he is an active jw and i am a practising church of england person.
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caliber
If a man finds himself falling madly head over heals in love with someone. ... then he is experiencing a feeling, an emotion. It comes from his heart. however ones attitude comes from his mind.
The truth is that there are all sorts of things happening at any given time and we select on a subliminal level to only notice those things that validate our existing belief system
The reason that attitude wins the battle over our feelings in the long haul is that feelings are ever changing and flexible while attitudes are often locked into place and become law in our minds. Our inner core attitudes control us... unless we made concerted effort to change them ! -
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caliber
Why Does The Partner Who Is Less than In Love Marry Anyway?
.They believe there are no better prospects out there than the one they've got ?
.The partner proposing marriage offers other things that are important to them, such as good parenting attributes, attentiveness, emotional stability or financial security ? ( may like or love the person but not" in love", but they are secure and comfortable in a financial aspect so they enjoy themselves more with the person, they can go out together go on trips together and
some marry for what they then think is love, but it is security only ...without deep feelings
.They believe that a passionate, attractive, charismatic partner is more likely to cheat on them or leave them. They choose someone less attractive than they are to feel safer from infidelity and more in control of the relationship The older you get the less drama (turmoil) you need in your life !
.They have low expectations for marital satisfaction but prefer the idea of marriage to remaining single ?
( over the years and time however partners who thought there were no better prospects for them manage to meet someone who does seem better (at least on the surface) and who wants them. Dormant fantasies bubble to the surface (Partners who thought they would somehow fall more in love over time feel even less passionate because a big part of falling in love has to do with mystery, novelty, discovery and challenges.The new interest seems to fill this need or hidden desire.)
the partner becomes more malleable, clingy and insecure until the love and respect the partner used to feel for them becomes completely eroded.
.they did it to please mom & dad or a religion ?
Can you really ever hope to fall in love with someone later .... in the future ?
Or is it like expecting a child... you know nothing about them but you know you will love them just the same ..as soon as they arrive ?Did you believe that if both are "in the truth " you'll both have fine qualities and things will "work out " ?
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What the devil is capable of
by StopTheTears inthrough the years i and many of my companions have seen quite a few things done by devils that are not specifically mentioned in the.
bible including things similar to this:.
i received an im from some unknown source telling me that a crystal ball was going to be delivered in our church building.
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caliber
Sarcasm.... " The bastard step-child of irony "