I lived in the midwest for many years and know about pioneering in brutally cold weather. It was common to wear pants, even jeans, under your skirt in service during winter. All you had to do was wear tall boots, preferably riding boots, with a long skirt and no one even knew you had pants on underneath. I never thought to ask if it was okay because it just made sense because it was so cold outside. It also made it easier to hangout after service...rip off your skirt...pull your pant leg over your boots and you were good to go...to the mall...to the movies...etc. That was a very common practice when I lived in the midwest.
shopaholic
JoinedPosts by shopaholic
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Cold Weather Dress Code for Witnesses
by WTWizard inwith the advent of cooler weather (at least in canada and the northern us), one might think of how the witnesses are going to cope.
for certain, dress codes are going to have different effects now than they did when it was broiling hot.. men are going to be more comfortable now.
cooler weather means that the coat is not going to create as much heat stroke risk as it did in the heat of mid summer.
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Hanging out with JWs after you no longer believe
by B_Deserter init's starting to become harder and harder to hang out with witnesses.
all their talk about how evil the world is, etc.
i was at a gathering last night, and this older couple was their talking about how their granddaughter came back because she got a taste of how the world was, her so-called friends were freeloading off her and stealing her stuff.
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shopaholic
B_Deserter,
We're in a similar situation except I've decided I don't want to DA myself. I've already stopped hanging out with JW's except my pretend boyfriend, which I'll cut loose very soon.
Homerovah,
I'm considering a similar approach. How did you let your family and friends know that you no longer considered yourself part of the org? Did you gather them together and tell them or did you let them discover it through the natural progression of conversation?
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Watchtower Kool Aid
by TooBad TooSad inon numerous occasions on this site there have been discussion of the jw's drinking "kool aid".
if the watchtower said to do so.
i often laughed at this.
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shopaholic
About 80%. They would build up the drama by cancelling Saturday meeting and have those folks go on Sunday. Then the announcement would be made at every meeting that day. This would also mean there would not be much time for folks to call their relatives, you know...the other 10 million that show up at the memorial, to get a sip of the juice so the authorities would not have much time to intervene.
Here's what we have to remember, even for the doubters in attendance, this would be a time to prove that they love Jehovah. They would see this as time to make up for the times they did not informally witness, told someone "Happy Birthday", said "You too!" when someone wished them a merry christmas, lied on their field service slip, watched porn, got a little freaky with someone, stood up a bible student, worked overtime instead of going to the meeting, etc. The WTBS makes you feel so guilty about every little thing you do, that even the doubters in attendance would take a sip thinking it to be their time to show loyalty when it matters. Very few would have the courage to walk away from this cult.
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Sorry WTS - Higher Ed More Important Than Ever!
by Seeker4 ini'm working on an article tonight from an interview i did last week with jane sanders, the president of burlington college and the wife of us senator bernie sanders.
i was thinking of the wts's comments this summer at the dc where they really bad mouthed the value of a college education.. this is what jane sanders said:.
"the cost of education is very high, and we are one of the only industrialized nations in the world that doesnt give some kind of strong support to higher education, that considers that that is a necessity.
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shopaholic
The WTS knows higher education is important. Don't be fooled!!! I went to pioneer school almost 11 years ago and was a faithful witness until my fade a year ago. Anyway, when it was found out at pioneer school that I had a BA in a particular discipline, I received a few invitations to Bethel. I turned them down. My P.O. at the time and family totally agreed (especially since they, family & cong, enjoyed some of my perks). It just didn't interest me as I valued my freedom and knew that the 7am cattle call wouldn't work for me.
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how sad am I?
by ness inits a saturday night and im at home on jwd.
im pathetic.. now, someone amuse me before i go get myself another glass of wine and begin spamming up the forum with drunken posts..
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shopaholic
ness,
I'm at home lurking and posting and feeling pathetic about being on JWD on a saturday night as well. Remember that it's just a "transition". You should volunteer for cool events in your area. I've volunteered for upcoming charity events and for a few fashion week events. Hey, its a start and will get me out and socializing. Find something you enjoy and get involved, then you want feel pathetic about the saturday nights you're hanging out here. Well, thats what they tell me anyway.
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Do You Wish It Was 1950
by freyd ini know we've got computers, cell phones and supermarkets, but was life back then better?
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shopaholic
No. But I'd do the 80's over again!!!!
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Tomorrow will be one of the PROUDEST days of my life.
by nicolaou iniv'e been posting here a long time but here's something i never shared before .
i'm still a window cleaner.
i'm not going to rant at the 'society' because they don't own my anger anymore but my work is certainly a legacy of my cult past.
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shopaholic
nicolaou,
CONGRATULATION!!!!! You have every right to be proud. Just wait until he graduates, you're really going to be beside yourself with pride and joy.
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Do those of you "born into the truth" have problems with relationships?
by marmot ini'm a 4th generation dub and i was the epitome of a goodie-two-shoes elder's son.
i was taught/brainwashed that dating was evil and only for mature brothers (i distinctly remember a part on the assembly with a "demonstration" that said even 24 years old was too young to date and you should concentrate on becoming a ms or pioneer first) and went through so much soul-destroying guilt because of the society's utterly ridiculous stance on masturbation that it almost drove me to suicide.
didn't help that my father the elder had a massive porn stash.
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shopaholic
Yes, I do. After 34 years of being told that "worldly people" are not to be trusted, what more should I expect? When I first moved out of my parents house into my own place (at age 25), everyone told me about the sexually perverse life that I was going to lead (never happened) and sent me news clippings of single women being killed or raped. I'm not exaggerating. So its no wonder that I have a fear that if I do anything with non-witnesses that I will end up on the 10 o'clock news or as next morning headlines.
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My mom called...my niece no longer wants to be one of JWs
by shopaholic inmy mom called and so did several other folks over the past week to tell me that my neice has announced that she no longer wants to be one of jws and will not be returning to the kingdom hall.
supposedly she made this annoucement a several months ago and no one took her seriously till her mom (my ex-sister-in-law and a super pioneer of more than 20 years) just stopped attending meetings a few months ago.
anyway, since they both seemed to have stopped drinking the kool-aid, i get the conf-call from several family members.
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shopaholic
I encourage people leaving the WTS if possible to not get officially df'd/da'd and maintain family relationships if there is a value. This is not easy and very challenging.
Gayle, it's extremely challenging. I've often thought that to DA might be easier because its a clean break but I do love my family (and I have big one) and I do enjoy their company. I don't want to choose between my family and my freedom. Also, I know it would potientally cause a division among my family. My dad, who is not a JW, would not be able to grasp the concept of my mom and siblings and relatives not talking to me. Did I mention I'm his favorite? Its no secret in my family. So I've thought about that as well. Which is why I've chosen to fade.
Urrrgh...why did I ever get baptized?! I know I shouldn't dwell on the past but I could buy a magic stick and change it, I would.
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My mom called...my niece no longer wants to be one of JWs
by shopaholic inmy mom called and so did several other folks over the past week to tell me that my neice has announced that she no longer wants to be one of jws and will not be returning to the kingdom hall.
supposedly she made this annoucement a several months ago and no one took her seriously till her mom (my ex-sister-in-law and a super pioneer of more than 20 years) just stopped attending meetings a few months ago.
anyway, since they both seemed to have stopped drinking the kool-aid, i get the conf-call from several family members.
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shopaholic
As far as wanting to keep a relationship open, one must ask the question whether a relationship based on illusion is really a a relationship at all. Family should be family regardless if you put on a facade or not. In the end, playing the facade leaves you with being untrue to yourself and your family, and if nothing else may serve to enable them to continue believing their own farce they're living. I truly think one has to develop a solid moral compass, and following that will allow us to make things as simple or as difficult as we want.
John Doe, you make a very good point. Yesterday evening my sister asked me about pictures from my recent visit and what the "the friends" thought of the pictures. I simply said "They thought they were nice." At that very moment I thought about your earlier post and then I make it home to read this one. I basically left one lie only to live a different until I come clean. There are no "friends" to show the pictures to because I haven't been to KH in several months, no field service in almost a year. As long as I continue to lie to myself and others, I am being untrue to myself and there is no solid moral compass.
And it does make life more difficult. I have to remember to never call my family on my supposed meeting nights and to have a sense about when the CO is going visit and assembly dates and such. Then I have to remember to not answer the phone when I'm suppose to being something JW, if I do, they ask why did I answer the phone as they called to just leave me a message and I'd have to quickly come up with something. I also have watch the timing of my emails. As type this post, I realize how pathetic it is for me to jump through all these hoops.
Once I'm honest with my family, I realize that they will ask how long have I been pulling this charade and to know its been almost a year will only hurt them more. So no more procrastinating. Even though I haven't built up the support base that I'll probably need, I know what I need to do. I just hope everyone in family doesn't jump on a plane to come save me from "the world".
John Doe...thank you.