Rocky_Girl

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Posts by Rocky_Girl

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  16

  My first experience at KH

  by InChristAlone in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  thank you to all of you who commented yesterday.

  no doubt you gave me an accurate description of what to expect.

  when i first walked in, i was greeted by the jw who calls on my house.

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  Rocky_Girl

  Interesting observation.

  The meetings are like children's movies (i.e. Shrek); there is superficial content meant for non-jws (like the kid's content in the movie) and there is a deeper layer of content made for the jws (like the adult humor in the movie) that goes over the first audience's head.

  You heard a lot of buzz words and key phrases that most likely made no impression on you because you have no context for it. Any of us, who were in the org for a while and have the teachings burned into our brains, would have an immediate reaction to those words. In jws who are still in, it is a comforting feeling because it is a reinforcement of what they already believe and it causes them to relax and drift in what they feel is an escape from Satan's influence in the world. For us that have left, it can be extremely uncomfortable (in fact, it makes me physically ill) to hear those phrases and words.

  I hope you found what you were looking for in the experience, but be aware that there is an undercurrent at every meeting that is not felt by casual visitors.
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  81

  What constitutes 'proof' on JWN?

  by besty in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  recently there have been a few threads where claims have been made alledging personal negative effects in 'real life' following internet activity on jwn and other ex-jw related sites.

  discussion then ensues, aspects of which may include 3rd parties either disputing the truth or affirming the likelihood of the claim.

  questions are asked.

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  Rocky_Girl

  Besty: Do I understand your question correctly? Are you asking what is needed as proof of personal experiences people post about on this forum?

  So, for example, say I came on here and wrote a long, sad story about how the wt ruined my life and how I'm trying to leave and have included emails from my family and things said by elders to me to back up my assertion. How do you know if what I say is true? What proof should I provide?

  If this is what you mean, I would say that my word is enough.

  We all know there have been posters that have gone on and on with unbelievable stories looking for sympathy and attention. If I feel someone is being dishonest about how they are being treated, I just don't respond to them. I don't waste energy trying to pick apart their story because it doesn't matter. If they break forum rules and ask for money, Simon & Co usually put a stop to it fairly quickly.

  If you are talking about posters accusing other posters of misdeeds, it can get a lot messier. But I think that, unless there is something against forum rules, it is just out there and you have to ignore it. I believe that calling out another poster in a topic is against the rules, so report it and get on with your life.

  We are all here to heal, or help others heal. We can't demand proof. We just have to decide what action we will take. You can believe what they say and try to help them out in whatever way you find best. You can respond and accuse, which only reinforces the "victim" complex and rallies those who believe the person to defend them. Or, you can ignore them and hope that the lack of attention moves the post into oblivion. At the end of the day, you have to decide if it is really worth your time and energy to force honesty from an anonymous person you met online. Hint: It isn't...

  Just my 2 cents...
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  25

  Have The JWs Changed All That Much In The Last 20 Years All That Much?

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i believe most witnesses believe that there is nothing new in their religion....would you agree with them?.

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  Rocky_Girl

  I see a huge difference!!

  I was baptized in September of 1993, when I was 13. I spent the next 5 years as a regular pioneer (1000 hrs/yr) and I could quote out-of-context scripture from memory at the door and work my way through the 1914 doctrine with one arm tied behind my back. So could the other 12-14 young pioneers in my age group. Of course, we were heavily trained by two older lifelong pioneers who would even bust down on the young men (haha) and just laugh at the elders when counselled to treat these young brothers with respect. I look back at my arrogance and just cringe.

  Everyone in that group have left (faded, da'ed, df'ed) their respective congregations (5 in our city) with only a few that returned. According to my mom, we were the last "zealous" young pioneer group.

  I am 33 now and when I look at the 25 and younger crowd in my folks' cong, I see a lot of "spiritual inactivity" and more focus on their families and social aspects. They all have small children and spend a lot of time outside of meetings, fs, etc. with each other camping, playing volleyball, skiing, etc. I saw a service group last Saturday with two vans full of 6 adults and a herd of children stop at the park in my neighborhood. Two of the men knocked on maybe 3 doors while the others set up a big blanket on the ground and pulled out a picnic. They were there from @9:30am until after I left my house at 12:30.

  This would not have been possible 15-20 years ago...

  I was happy to see kids playing and not being forced to sell the "truth" door to door. I hope that in time, this dangerous controlling group mellows out into a more mainstream religious group. It will take at least another 50 years, I think. But, at least in this congregation, it seems to be going that way.

  This could be why the ever changing doctrines do not bother the JWs. They simply didn't know or care about the old ones to see that they are different now.
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  32

  Stuff You Would Lose If You Went Back

  by Nosferatu in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  so we know all the things the wts prevents us from doing, but that's much, much different than the stuff we've grown accustomed to.. for those who have been out for a number of years, what kind of things would end up being abandoned if you suddenly started going back to the kingdom hall?

  you know, stuff that you now do on the nights you used to attend meetings, the things you own, the things you wear, etc..

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  Rocky_Girl

  myself...

  And just when I was starting to like that bitch :)
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  36

  I really need some help to get out of this religion

  by doughnutkitty in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  hi, i've been lurking on this site for quite a while after recently having doubts about the "truth".

  i've read a lot of posts about problems with the doctrines, mind control, the beliefs, brainwashing that jehovah's witnesses and their literature, as well as their history.

  now only being a sixteen year old born in who isn't baptized or unbaptized, i've come to find all this information incredibly overwhelming.

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  Rocky_Girl

  I am glad you decided to post!

  Since you have not been manhandled into getting baptized yet, it seems unlikely that it will happen now. Generally, the parents who are hardcore about pushing baptism start at 11 or 12. I believe that you will be able to avoid it now fairly easily. If anyone asks why you haven't done it, just be honest and say you aren't ready to take such a big step.

  Lots of young people attend churches with their parents, with no intention of being an active participant. I know that it is different at the KH because of the way the information is given, but you still have the option to check out in your head during the talks. Just sail through the next two years; focus on school, make new friends on the outside, obey your parents' rules, and just relax.

  You won't have the traditional high school experience, with dances or athletics, but you can make up for that a hundred times in college. If you take the route of passive resistance, you will maintain a relationship with your family and in the years ahead you will be glad that you did.

  Post here when you have to blow off steam, there are a lot of people who can help you keep your cool and maneuver through your fade.

  Good luck!
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  10

  always apostasy?

  by losingit in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  so i've been reading many posts and threads of people's experiences leaving the jw fold.

  i get the impression that many here were df'd or da'd due to apostasy.

  is there anyone here that found out ttat after being df'd for a reason other than apostasy?

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  Rocky_Girl

  I left (not df'ed) when I was 18 because of the abuses of power among the elders. I heard one of them talking about my brother as if he were an animal right after he was disfellowshipped. I immediately told the service overseer that I couldn't pioneer any longer (reg pioneer for 5 years), told the school overseer that I couldn't make it to give my next talk, and left my key to the hall on the literature counter. I walked out and didn't return except for a few times with my mom years later.

  I didn't start to question until I was 25ish. My research kept me from returning.
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  81

  What Is The Most Absurd JW Belief or View?

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  there are many silly doctines and viewpoints.. one of the strangest ones is the blood doctrine.. why anyone could logically accept this belief is beyond reason..

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  Rocky_Girl

  We weren't allowed to watch the fireworks on the 4th of July. We had to hide in the basement so we couldn't "accidentally" see them. But, we could set them off for the week before and after... Craziness!

  We also had our entire 3 generation JW family together at grandma's for turkey dinner on the day after Thanksgiving.

  gogia2: We never had smashed easter eggs though. That is a little frightening!

  vidiot: I have two boys, 10 and 7.
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  81

  What Is The Most Absurd JW Belief or View?

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  there are many silly doctines and viewpoints.. one of the strangest ones is the blood doctrine.. why anyone could logically accept this belief is beyond reason..

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  Rocky_Girl

  Vidiot:

  Haha! The dream lapdance was one of the final straws for me. It was a classic case of "elder protecting daughter by transferring guilt onto non-elder's daughter."

  I read a lot, but haven't posted in a while because my phone won't work with this site. :)

  My children have their birthdays celebrated to the point that they feel like their b-day is a holiday. I like it that way! I hope they grow up feeling more confident than I did. :)
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  81

  What Is The Most Absurd JW Belief or View?

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  there are many silly doctines and viewpoints.. one of the strangest ones is the blood doctrine.. why anyone could logically accept this belief is beyond reason..

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  Rocky_Girl

  That you can celebrate anniversaries, but not birthdays.

  That every "faithful" person in the bible was an early "JW."

  The way they call others "christians" as if were an insult, while claiming to be true christians.
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  113

  What's The STRANGEST Thing You've Seen At A Kingdom Hall?

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i saw a fight break out on the platform between an elder and a unbelieving husband who accused the elder of f---ing his wife.

  he then threw the lectern on the floor and pushed the elder.

  it was cool.......

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  Rocky_Girl

  This has sort of turned into funny stories at the KH, so here are two of mine.

  There was a young, single ex-bethelite elder/pioneer in our congregation (too old for me, I was only 15-16) who really was a fun guy. He treated me like a little sister and I had a huge crush on him.

  Once, while he was reading for the WT study, I motioned to him that his fly was unzipped as he stood to read. He was so flustered that he had some issues reading, which made several others look at him funny, which caused him to turn red and feel even more sure that he was exposed. After he finished the paragraph and sat down, he realized he was all zipped up. He flipped me off discreetly. He was pulled aside after the meeting and was sure that he was caught. He was counseled about distracting young sisters during the meeting. (close call)

  Another time, he asked me last minute to be his householder for a presentation. He told me to say I was busy and about to go engage in risky behavior of some sort (the WT was on that subject) and then follow his lead through the rest of the presentation. So when he approached the "door" I said I could only stop for a moment because I was on my way to go skydiving. He wasn't expecting that, I guess, because it struck him so funny that he was speechless. The whole cong started giggling at his reaction and he barely made it through the rest of his part.

  He was such a great guy and he was treated horribly by our congregation's elders, who wanted him to stay single. He wanted to be married so badly. I keep hoping to run into him on here someday.

  ~RG