Posts by okiesooner1966

7

Ex JW Meetings

by okiesooner1966 in

jw
friends

i am new to this site but have out for more than 12 years.

would like to find a meeting group in florida.

any suguestions?

okiesooner1966

I am new to this site but have out for more than 12 years. Would like to find a meeting group in Florida. Any suguestions?

38

What exactly can I get disfellowshipped for?

by Younglove1999 in

my husband and i have been inactive for almost 8 months.

we haven't gone to a meeting and slowly our jw friends have stopped associating with us because we're "weak".

at some point, we'll be celebrating holidays.

My situation may be different, I married someone did not go to the hall. My parents found out about us celebrating christmas and was furious, probably did not talk to me for a month or so. Now they accept it, there is an unwritten rule they do not come to by the house in December. Do you plan on starting this year? If you do it may be a little early for your Mom and the Elders's. One more year of fading may be the best answer.

26

The Fader (Me) at a Restaurant with the Cong. Dubs (long)

by OnTheWayOut in

jw
friends

so this fellow from the congregation my wife goes to (and i am inactive from for almost 6 months).

is moving to where the need is greater.

he's an ms, totally indoctrinated loyal jw.

okiesooner1966

Been there done that, even while I was 17 and still forced to sit through the meetings my Mom and Dad would always go eat after the meetings. Myself and a couple of other friends my age who had the same rumors about them that I had about me, would set in one section of the resturaunt and everyone else would sit in another. Generally a couple of weeks later we were invited to the "sin bin" for another commitee meeting. If you are wanting to fade it is tough to continue to go these kind of fuctions. My Opinion only

17

Question for Ex-Elders

by okiesooner1966 in

i apologize in advance if seems like i have started to many new threads, but this site no pun intended has been awakining.

i could not ask for my life to be much better, but there is one problem that i have.

i know it is not healthy but it is my life, i have been smoking even before i left the org.

okiesooner1966

Although my Dad is still an Elder I have not been to his hall or any other hall in this area. The state I live in now is not whre I last attended meetings so I do not believe any Elders around here would have it out for me personally unless for some reason they have a problem with my Dad. And yes I would like to quit one day, however it is not something I would like to do at this time. I do not smoke with my child in the house or car.

17

Question for Ex-Elders

by okiesooner1966 in

i apologize in advance if seems like i have started to many new threads, but this site no pun intended has been awakining.

i could not ask for my life to be much better, but there is one problem that i have.

i know it is not healthy but it is my life, i have been smoking even before i left the org.

okiesooner1966

I apologize in advance if seems like I have started to many new threads, but this site no pun intended has been awakining. I could not ask for my life to be much better, but there is one problem that I have. I know it is not healthy but it is my life, I have been smoking even before I left the org. I am not disfellowshipped and it has not been a problem before . I have a five year old now that finally is aware of his surroundings, we allow him to see his Grandparents who love him very much, on nights they do not have meetings. To make a long story short he finally told them that I smoke, which I immediately denied like I did any other time I got in trouble with the elders. I am tired of keeping this from them I have been doing it for fifteen years. If I was to come clean to my Dad which is an elder, can I still be dissfellowshipped even though I have had not been at any of the meetings or associated with any other witnesses in almost twelve years?

40

WHA WAS THE TURNING POINT FOR YOU IN JWS

by chuckyy in

hi.. just wondering what it was that first made you realise that jws didnt have the absolute "truth"?

was there a specific event/turning point for you or was it a moment of enlightenment?.

chukky.

okiesooner1966

I was raised in the "Truth" so I basically just took everything as gospel. My turning point actually came over time when I realized this was not the kind of life I wanted to live. Fortunetely except for maybe about a year did I ever take it very serious. To this day I could not quote a scrpiture without getting it wrong. I think it probaliy is different with people raised in the religon raither than finding it later. Most of my friends that were raised in the truth except for a handful have been out for a long time.

29

What kinds of fading techniques have you used?

by ldrnomo in

some of you may have seen my post in jedi masters topic but if you haven't i will re-post it here:.

i'm new to the site, my wife and i are are doing the fade we still have a son and daughter-in-law who are still in so we don't want to get hung.

i was an elder for 25 years and was removed because i didn't agree with the gb on an important issue and spoke privately and with trust to another elder who broke that trust and told the other elders and co about my disagreement.

okiesooner1966

You have a great heart heart, that will take you along ways in your new life, just make sure you leave time for youselves to enjoy what this world has to offer. Fading in my opinon is the best way to go, If i had not done it my son would have never been able to have a relationship with his Grandparents.

8

The Rest of My Story-The Fading Years

by okiesooner1966 in

i would like to start by saying the years following high school were probably even more stressful than before.

the very day i graduating i moved out of my parents house, it took all of three weeks to get my next commitee meeting.

i did a horrible thing by going on a graduation trip with some of my classmates, even though all did was party like it any other kid my age, which thier parents paid for thier trp it was enough for me to be disassociated, though i was not baptized at the time it was the same as being disfellowshipped.

okiesooner1966

I would like to start by saying the years following high school were probably even more stressful than before. The very day I graduating I moved out of my parents house, it took all of three weeks to get my next commitee meeting. I did a horrible thing by going on a graduation trip with some of my classmates, even though all did was party like it any other kid my age, which thier parents paid for thier trp it was enough for me to be disassociated, though I was not baptized at the time it was the same as being disfellowshipped. I was working for my dad at the time who was an elder who promptly fired me because he could know longer associate with me in either a work or social enviroment. This turn of events sent my life in a tail spin for probably two years. I began to do everything they tought us not to do, this lead eventually to a serious drug addiction, that if was not for one of my supposedly "worldly" friends I may not have survived. After a successful drug treatment I moved back into my parents house, six months later reinstated, two months later guilted into being baptized and then rushed into a marriage based on lust.

After we were married about two years we began to gradually miss meeetings and basically stop going in service. One night we were out having dinner with one of our married friends, I had probably five or six beers, I did'nt think anything of it at the time. About two weeks later my dad who to this day is still an elder called me and said they were planning on formming another comittee meeting on me because it was reported I was drunk at dinner a couple of weeks ago. Finally for the first time I said enough is enough, I told him to not bother scheduling anything because I was not drunk, not only that I will no longer be attending any more meetings period.

My marriage lasted another year until my wife and I realized the only thing we had in common was the religon and sex. I have attended the memorial for every year since just to keep my mom from having a heart attack. I am now remarried for the past nine yaers, I have a son who is geeting to do everything I was not allowed to do and its been the best years of my life. I have my own company that is thriving and life could not be any better. My mom still tries monthly to convience me the end is closer than its ever been, I simply change the subject or tell her that's why I live everyday like it could be my last. Thank you all for giving each of us an outlet like this, we will all have scars and perhaps a few issues, perhaps even a few charcter flaws from the religion that was forced upon us. Fortunately for most of us we were able to find our own way and enjoy life as it was actually meant to be, not how someone told us it should be enjoyed.

Thank you,

8

My Story

by okiesooner1966 in

i apologize i am actually 40 that was a misprint.. here it goes,.

i was born into this religon in 1966 to second generation witness parents.

from the time i can remeber even at three or four years old it was drilled in my head that this was the last days.

okiesooner1966

I apologize I am actually 40 that was a misprint.

Here it goes,

I was born into this religon in 1966 to second generation witness parents. From the time I can remeber even at three or four years old it was drilled in my head that this was the last days. What horrible thing to have to deal with when you are four. I remeber my parents very vividly telling me that I would probably not make it to kindergarten, the end would come before that.

School was horrible thru my early years, constantly being pulled out of classes due to some celebration they were having. However at the time it did'nt bother me that much because I was told we were doing the right thing, this was all just normal to me. Once I turned twelve everything began to change, I was just not going along with what my parents wanted me to do. Being that my dad was and Elder it seemed I was always held to higher satndard. It wasnt just good enough that we made our recommended ten hour a month in door knocking, we had to strive for fifteen and generally made it. The three meetings a week, Sat. and Sun. service Sun. morning watchower review before the meeting and my moms weekly bible study with was just to much to take.

I began to rebel and rebel hard, I had my first commitee meeting when I was 14 years old, it seems like yesterday, the thing I remeber most about the mmeting was details the elders wanted. Threre was me and another girl involved in a relationship she to also went to my hall. They brought her in and literally interigated her for hours until she sang like a bird. By the time they brought me they had both barrels loaded, where did you begin touching her, was your hands over her shirt or under her shirt. My dad was not even allowed in the room which my freinds and I called the sin den. I personally believe now they got off on hearing every detail. Through the rest of my school years it was pretty much the same thing except each offense became worse. I will have to go into it later about my parents drilling into my head about there will be no chace of me furthering my education past High-School because we will not be in this system of things long enough to use it. I will finish the rest of this story within the next few days, this is making me ill rehashing all of this. Thanks for your patients I am beginning to open up alot of old wounds I have not thought about in years.

27

I'M NEW WISHED IWOULD HAVE FOUND THIS SITE A LONG TIME AGO

by okiesooner1966 in

here is part of my story until i have more time.

i am know 30 years old, i have been married for almost 9 years to someone who has no relgous ties at all.

i was baptized when i was 19 due to pressure from my family, they wanted me to to get baptized when i was 16. i think i may hold the record for most comitee meetings probably about 20, i was publilcly reproved and disassociated.

okiesooner1966

HELLO EVERYONE,

HERE IS PART OF MY STORY UNTIL I HAVE MORE TIME. I AM KNOW 30 YEARS OLD, I HAVE BEEN MARRIED FOR ALMOST 9 YEARS TO SOMEONE WHO HAS NO RELGOUS TIES AT ALL. I WAS BAPTIZED WHEN I WAS 19 DUE TO PRESSURE FROM MY FAMILY, THEY WANTED ME TO TO GET BAPTIZED WHEN I WAS 16. I THINK I MAY HOLD THE RECORD FOR MOST COMITEE MEETINGS PROBABLY ABOUT 20, I WAS PUBLILCLY REPROVED AND DISASSOCIATED. I DECIDED IN1997 THAT IWAS DONE WITH WHEN MY DAD WHO IS AN ELDER CAME TO ONE DAY AND SAID THEY WERE GOING TO FORM ANOTHER COMMITEE ON ME BECAUSE IT HAD BEEN REPORTED THAT I WAS DRINKING WITH SOME FREINDS AND MAY HAVE HAD TO MUCH TO DRINK. THAT DAY I TOLD HIM TO GO AHEAD AND FORM A COMITTEE BUT I WOULD NOT BE MEETING WITH THEM BECAUSE I WAS NO LONGER GOING THROUGH MY LIFE WORRIED ABOUT THIS TYPE OF SITUATION AGAIN. I SIMPLY QUIT GOING TO THE MEETINGS, AFTER THAT IWAS ONLY VISITED ONE MORE TIME AND TOLD THEM I WOULD NOT ADDRES THAT OR ANY OTHER ISSUE AGAIN. I AM NOT DISFELLOWSHIPPED, HOWEVER I HAVE NOT A NORMAL RELATIONSHIP WITH MY PARENTS SINCE EVEN THOUGH WE TALK. MY MOM AND I GET INTO OUR NORMAL ARGUMENTS AFTER SHE RETURNS FROM THE ASSEMBLIES AND TELLS ME ABOUT DIFFERENT NEW LIGHTS. THERE ARE SO MANY THINGS I WOULD LIKE TO TALK ABOUT, IHAVE CHARCTER FLWS THAT ONLY YOU GUYS MAY UNDERSTAND. I AM PROBABLY ONE OF THE MOST DEFENSFUL PERSONS YOU WILL EVER MEET. I HAVE SPENT THE MAJORITY OF MY LIFE DEFENDING EVRYTHING I DID, IWAS QUESTIONED CONSTANTLY BY THE ELDERS AND FAMILY ABOUT WHAT I WAS DOING WRONG. I HAVED LIVED IN FEAR SINCE IWAS BORN THAT IF I DO NOT ADHERE TO CERTAIN RULES THAT I WOULD DIE WITH THE RES OF THE WICKED PEOPLE. THIS IS MY FIRST STEP IN ATTEMPTING TO RID MYSELF OF THIS THINKING, THANKS FOR LETTING ME BEGIN TO HEAL. I WILL BE POSTING AGAIN TO TELL THE REST OF MY STORY.