Welcome brotherdan!!
Ive been through a simmler situation that ended in a seperation,For the best in the end.
My advice,Sit down and tell your wife you love her and the children more than anything else.
Explane that you don't belive it anymore and she will never ever here you say a bad word about it she & the children are free to go to meetings field service all they want but you have made up your mind.
Leave it at that and see if you(s) can't come to some sort of a truce.
In time she may ask a few questions and you can go from there.
As far as your children go (all 3 of mine are out) Lets face it how many young ones are sticking around anyway?
If you need to PM me ...ive been through it.
Karter.