It is beautiful. There is no other feeling than being free after being born into bondage. The peace I feel in my life is indescribable.
Deidra
JoinedPosts by Deidra
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16
How sweet is it to NOT be a JW?
by new light indo you ever revisit the old jw ways of thinking, and then compare it to the complete freedom that you have now?
do you remember judging and fearing the everyday activities of the people around you?
remember that dread of restating "your" position on holidays every few weeks, knowing you would just end up further alienated from coworkers?
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The angst of dealing with family when they are still in and you are not...
by Layla33 ini don't think you ever truly make peace with it, somehow you learn to maneveur and swim in it like most things.
i have been out for so long, it's almost like a shadowy memory when i was in, but for my family it is all they have ever known and dared to know.. i feel for the people whose parents have cut them out completely, but mine never truly did that.
i guess we just loved each other a little too much to even think about losing the other completely.
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Deidra
The Doc-58
I'm with you. It is much better for my mental health not to play games with my parents. They are fully aware that I shun them also and that it isn't up to them rather we have a relationship. It's no longer on their terms. It feels good for once in my life not to have the fear of shunning held over my head if I don't act a certain way.
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The angst of dealing with family when they are still in and you are not...
by Layla33 ini don't think you ever truly make peace with it, somehow you learn to maneveur and swim in it like most things.
i have been out for so long, it's almost like a shadowy memory when i was in, but for my family it is all they have ever known and dared to know.. i feel for the people whose parents have cut them out completely, but mine never truly did that.
i guess we just loved each other a little too much to even think about losing the other completely.
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Deidra
Jamiebowers, I'm been shunned completely also. Therefore, it's best to move on instead of hope oneday that they'll accept us. The fact that we're completely shunned tells me that they have absolutely no human compassion/hear/feelings left in them. The fact that they don't maintain some contact shows that they are staunch hard.
IP_SEC, that's good you have a relationship with your family. But doesn't it make you feel like sh** when your family fakes shunning you in front of other JWS. My family used to downplay our relationship to others before they completely shunned me (once I made a christian stand) and it made me feel cheep. Not good enough for others to know about, kinda like a mistress or prostitute. I'd rather them shun me all the time instead of them sneaking to love me. That doesn't feel very good either.
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I 'never' answer the door when JWs come a knockin' but . . .
by Gayle ini 'never' answer the door when jws (2 men) come to the door, well, yesterday i did,,and i couldn't help it.
i dominated the conversation,,wouldn't let them talk much,,stayed on the blood issue for the most part, about 6/7 min., they excused themselves & left.
they were kind of like deer facing headlights of a speeding car.
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Deidra
Finally-Free
Give them shit; they treat us like shit. Turn the tables on their asses. They don't even bother to come to my door; never have. I must be on a list or something. I could of only been put there by my own parents. Losers--stealing my thunder! I gon't even get the satisfaction of slamming the door in their faces. I guess I'll move too.
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First time JWs have been at my door--post exit...
by Confession ini was actually at my friend's house.
since he's out of town a lot, i stop in to check the chlorine in his pool, get his mail, etc.
the doorbell rang.
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Deidra
Doesn't it feel good to speak your mind?
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14
I was DF'd one year ago today!
by bluesbreaker59 injust thought i'd celebrate my one year anniversary!!!
!
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Deidra
Congratulations. Now start enjoying life.
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22
The angst of dealing with family when they are still in and you are not...
by Layla33 ini don't think you ever truly make peace with it, somehow you learn to maneveur and swim in it like most things.
i have been out for so long, it's almost like a shadowy memory when i was in, but for my family it is all they have ever known and dared to know.. i feel for the people whose parents have cut them out completely, but mine never truly did that.
i guess we just loved each other a little too much to even think about losing the other completely.
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Deidra
I agree with everyone. The pain never goes away of losing your family. We just have to keep it moving and make good lives for themselves. Guaranteed, we are happier than they are. We are happier without them then we would be with them. Life with them brings along alot of BS.
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31
Help Me Please !!!!!!!!
by Maddie ini need some support and advice with my situation and hope you don't mind me going on a bit because i feel wretched!
i hurt so much with my jw family relationship and find it so frustrating that whatever i do or say doesn't make any difference.. my son and wife had a little girl 9 months ago, my first and only grand child and i love her so much.
when she was born my hubby and i helped them a lot wiith buying all the expensive things she needed, as my son hadn't a well paying job as being a die hard jw he believes in the "education and career isn't what you should be doing propaganda" put out buy the wt.
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Deidra
Maddie, my heart feels your pain too. I went through the wishy washy thing with my parents/family for years. One minute they loved me and I was a great daughter and then another minute they wouldn't even talk to me (usually on Sunday or after a circuit/district convention). They were warm and cold. Their love was conditional. The farther I got away from JW and the more outspoken I became for my newfound christian beliefs, the worse they got. I got tired of "feeling them out." The status of our relationship was up to them at all times. I got damn sick of it. I feel so much better now that I took the driver's seat and said enough is enough. It is no longer up to them rather we engage in conversation, etc. I want nothing to do with them. The roller coaster pain is over with them. Yes, it does hurt that I don't have any family. However, I feel free from their enslavement, judgement, and mental abuse. It hurts, but it's consistent hurt; no more mind games. It may sound harsh, dear, but you need to protect yourself and start healing. They are going to dangle that little girl in front of you forever until you give in to their strong-arming. For you and your husband's sake, don't let them mentally abuse you anymore.
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21
what did you get dissfellowshipped for and were you once "strong"
by looloo inin the truth (as they say) were people really shocked at you leaving or thought of it as only a matter of time !
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Deidra
I got disfellowshipped for being "an unrepentant fornicator." Funny because I went to the elders, they didn't come to me.
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32
Intro: disfellowshipped as a teen in 1999
by Moxie ingreetings and warm wishes to everyone out there...
this is my first post here on the site, though i have spent many countless hours as a guest reading and reading your posts and conversations.
they have been a great encouragement to me, who as a young woman was disfellowshipped from the society about nine years ago.
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Deidra
Welcome. I think that you'll find that most of us here can sympathize and help with your pain. Most of us have suffered similar pain.