Shane,
You are right. There is a blind loyalty to the "organization" over the family, and that can cause great heartbreak. We were taught that the family IS less important than the organization, and that the JW's would be our 'everlasting' family in an upcoming paradise.
These ideas allow the organization and its elders to exercise unreasonable control over families. Disfellowshipping always consigns families to breakdown. (Good point Shane, God hates a divorcing so he would hate this shunning practice too.) How often the disfellowshipped ones are treated as dead by their JW family and relatives! How little human concern they show!
And here's the other thing. The Society's own "Family" books explain how important a SPIRITUAL bond is between husband and wife, that without it the marriage cannot thrive. But let's say the husband is disfellowshipped. Guess what, he is prohibited from SPIRITUAL contact with his wife and baptized children. This (using the Family book's own reasoning) will doom the marriage. What kind of a marriage is it when you can only talk about life's necessities and the weather, but not about what really matters?
So the disfellowshipping arrangement dooms marriages into which it is introduced.
GopherEven if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.
Will Rogers (1879-1935)