I want to add that I know it's hard for a parent to not feel they are getting the respect they deserbe when they have made countless sacrifices for their children.
I think that it's really a great and humble thing for you to get outside opinions for clarity in the situation. Not the easiest thing to be a parent and just the fact that you came here shows you care and are probably normally a really wonderful, loving parent.
Imo, you made a mistake. We all do. I wish you the best.