What sucks is that he has given 53 years to serving his congregation and now that he needs help there is nobody there to offer it. I see the same thing happening in my grandfather in-laws congregation.
Posts by AlyMC
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38Told My Mom- "Dad's Got Too Much Load on Him as a 82 Year Old Elder "
by flipper inthis is kind of a secondary thread to the one i started about my conversation with my mom the other day about the bethel thing with my older brother !
so, my mom starts talking with me about my dad 82, an elder in the congregation for 53 years being drained and exhausted , and stressed as he has no help in his book study he conducts !
as some of you know , my sister, who lives near my parents just had a stroke , and my mom and dad have been having to help her out with her house, feed the cat while she is in physical therapy - and drive down an hour one way to see my sister in physical therapy , a lot to do for them being 80 and 82 !
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11
10 yrs since i was df'd, thinking of going to church this weekend
by orbison11 inbut i am thinking of going to church,,,,a rather large one,,,over 1000, chwk alliance church, i think i can hide quite well in a cong.
that big.
have a spiritual need, but so hate organized religion,,so i am so confused,,yet i use to love studying the bible,,,,dont ask me why.
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AlyMC
Even though I don't have a faith, I've enjoyed going to real churches the times I've gone. It can actually be a fun experience in the right places. I remember the first time my SIL came to the hall with me- she said "it is so depressing though... like don't you leave feeling more drained than when you came?" I had no idea what she meant until I went to her church and left feeling happy and uplifted.
I often wish I could find the faith to believe, because I'd love to have a "church home" and the comfort of faith.
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8
SPELLCHECK
by Tired of the Hypocrisy insomeone posted, "where is spellcheck?
" i have a trick i learned a couple of years ago when i got onto some bbs.
most boards do not offer a spell checker.
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AlyMC
Mine does as well, peppermint... but it didn't always. At some point I was on a message board and clicked the spell check icon and did a quick download or plug in of some sort (I'm pretty sure it was windows based) and ever since then the red wavy line shows up when I misspell a word.
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38
Elders refuse to Testify
by The Scotsman incame across this article - .
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the case goes to court today i think.. you will notice that the org + the local elders are only interested in protecting confidentiality and are refusing to testify.. the rights of the victims are lower on the priority scale.. makes me shudder.
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AlyMC
The difference is obvious, and I doubt they will win here. If you go to confession you are confessing to one person and that person is bound by an oath not to tell ANYONE. The elders have already talked about it openly with the victim's mother and perhaps even more. Obviously it isn't a true confidentiality issue.
I'm glad the Victim's mother is pursuing this instead of just rolling over and assuming the "firm talking to" and the bible is enough to stop this man (assuming his guilt of course).
It is hard not to become irate about stuff like this, regardless of what religion it is. You can't just ignore molestation because you were told in confidence. I think there are some things the sinner needs to STFU about and rot in their own guilt if they don't want it "out there". The idea of being able to confess to molestation, do a penance and move on is really quite sickening.
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87
Lets talk about Jesus!
by real one inluke 4:16-19 jesus, went back to nazareth, where he had been brought up, and as usual he went to the meeting place on the sabbath.
when he stood up to read from the scriptures, he was given the book of isaiah the prophet.
he opened it and read,.
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AlyMC
"Soon I discovered that this rock thing was true. Jerry lee lewis was the devil. Jesus was an architect previous to his career as a prophet"
Sorry... WRT Jesus, I'm not at all convinced Jesus was a literal existent being who wasn't inflated with time and storytelling.
However, if you take the gospels out of the bible and focus on them- I can get into the message. The message he had was one I could support, I can't help but wonder why mainstream Christianity that claims to support him looks nothing like him as a whole. To much Paul, not enough Jesus.
I could actually get into a religion that focussed on the gospels not as literal events, but as wisdom from ancient times in the form of myth and storytelling. Weren't the gnostics along that line? -
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My friend needs advice re: wife who wants to leave JWs but won't celebrate
by truthseeker ini have a friend who has started the slow fade.
recently, his wife talked about leaving, but she is still hung up on worldly holidays.. this is what he says.... one of the concerns my wife has about leaving "the truth" is that she wants our children to grow up with wholesome examples and association with their peers.
my wife knows jws aren't the only religion to teach their kids to behave morally, but what about the holidays?
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AlyMC
My husband didn't feel comfortable with holidays right away either. There are still many we've never felt motivated to start. We started with seasonal celebrations that were vague and of our own building. "Winter celebration" nothing more than a celebration of the new season and cycle of the earth. It evolved into full blown celebrations over the years. But it was a good gateway for us.
I also have a word document with all the scriptures and articles I used to justify holidays in my mind back when I was first leaving saved on my hard drive... if you want to PM me an email I would be glad to attach it to you. Not especially well written, might be some tidbits to use anyway. -
30
Discipline
by LouBelle ini'm not a parent myself, so i'm only speaking from my own personal experiences as a child and as an observer.. do you or don't you believe in discipline?
i believe in it - i'm not talking beating your kid to a pulp or any verbal abuse like that.
i do believe that a smack, grounding and an explanation of why is not a bad thing if the child has misbehaved (not for some trivial thing either).
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AlyMC
It won't let me edit, so let me explain that I never doubted that you encouraged creativity with your kids.
Like I said, my reason for approaching it had more to do with explaining a possible perspective of the other mom than anything.
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30
Discipline
by LouBelle ini'm not a parent myself, so i'm only speaking from my own personal experiences as a child and as an observer.. do you or don't you believe in discipline?
i believe in it - i'm not talking beating your kid to a pulp or any verbal abuse like that.
i do believe that a smack, grounding and an explanation of why is not a bad thing if the child has misbehaved (not for some trivial thing either).
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AlyMC
I never doubted that about you. :)
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30
Discipline
by LouBelle ini'm not a parent myself, so i'm only speaking from my own personal experiences as a child and as an observer.. do you or don't you believe in discipline?
i believe in it - i'm not talking beating your kid to a pulp or any verbal abuse like that.
i do believe that a smack, grounding and an explanation of why is not a bad thing if the child has misbehaved (not for some trivial thing either).
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AlyMC
mmm... of course :) I have three very different kids so I totally get that. I totally get that people have different perspectives, which is why I keep saying "this is only my opinion" :)
BTW- the only reason I even brought it up and spoke of your scenario directly is because I easily could have been the other mother next to you that day, and I get tired of being considered a push over when I do in fact have a purpose in my style of parenting that is just not observed or understood by others :)
ETA- I just saw your edited post. My apologies to you. I was NOT trying to tell you that you were wrong. I do not believe you are wrong. I believe parents who love their children act in their best interest, even when they act differently than myself. I regular several parenting boards in which we constantly dissect a topic and contemplate thoughts using examples. It was only my intent to communicate and exchange thoughts with you, and not to change your mind or assert my opinions over that of your own. I sincerely apologize if that was not apparent or if it was an unwelcome exchange.
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30
Discipline
by LouBelle ini'm not a parent myself, so i'm only speaking from my own personal experiences as a child and as an observer.. do you or don't you believe in discipline?
i believe in it - i'm not talking beating your kid to a pulp or any verbal abuse like that.
i do believe that a smack, grounding and an explanation of why is not a bad thing if the child has misbehaved (not for some trivial thing either).
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AlyMC
Josie, I'm only speaking to you directly because I really value much of your input here and think are are a wonderfully rational woman who'd I'd be honored to know. I mean only to communicate, and no disrespect. I do respect your right to feel different than myself.
Regarding your paint story though, don't you worry that thoughts like that "because mom said no end of story" contribute to JW victim like mentalities? "Because the FDS said no end of story" I understand you are a mother, and not a religious society... but I wonder if it doesn't hold a similar air of loyalty regardless of free thought and conceptual understanding of the true issue at hand.
I understand that having kids listen definitively is easier and feels respectful. I personally think it is better to take a little extra time to explain the reason, or perhaps even allow them to disregard your suggestion not to mix paints and discover the consequence of doing so. IMO it better sets them up for adulthood than listening without question does.
Imagine for a moment the other mom suggesting her son doesn't mix the paints. He continues. He is delighted to discover that mixing primaries makes wonderful new colors to use! As he continues he discovers that he has made one neutral color. In the end some children have beautiful, colorful projects and he has a slightly mundane brown piece of artwork. he is disappointed and later tells his mom is is ugly or stupid. Now she can talk simply about color mixing and how she had suggested he not mix them. Maybe asking what he could do next time to avoid the brown mess.
He has learned A) sometimes mom's insights are worth listening to (and not just because she will know if he doesn't) and B) the next time someone says "you can mix the paints!" he can say "no thank you, mixing all the colors makes a neutral and I want color" he understand the concept behind the decision not to mix paints. To me this scenario better prepares a child for life than "no, I can't because I was told no", you know?