This whole thread makes me very sad. So many marriages hurt by the organization. Even if my ex and I were the most perfectly matched couple in the world, the marriage would not have been able to survive under the circumstances. He was never, ever home because of the endless parading to meetings, committees, shepherding etc. On the rare times he was home, he was either on the phone or working on a talk.
One memory that comes to mind is the time I planned a party for my youngest daughter. We were celebrating her 1 year anniversary of playing the violin (she was 3 1/2 and my other daughter was 5). We bought the girls a few presents each. I made a fancy cake. Set up a different games for the 4 of us to play in each room of the house (small house). I made the girls all their favorite foods and for the real kicker, I bought root beer (I allowed very little sugar through the years, so root beer was a real treat.) I decorated our dining room with balloons and streamers and all the frill of a young girl's party. My husband was excited about the party too. We just sat down in the dining room to start feasting (Dave set all the presents on the table) and the doorbell rings. It is a brother that wanted to talk. Would you not think he would have enough consideration to come back? Oh No, they go into the office and close the door. The girls and I patiently wait, but finally decide to eat, open the presents and play the games I had set up. When the brother had left, I asked Dave if it was really necessary to miss our party we had been planning for weeks. He said that the brother did not need anything, he just felt like visiting.
Things like this are painful to endure when they become a way of life. I still cannot understand how so many people did not realize that the girls and I needed him in our life. I wanted us to be a family so badly, but I was robbed of a husband and my two beautiful daughters grew up literally without a father.
