Posts by Fishbulb

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A video I made about the way the wtbts treats its workers

by Tired of the Hypocrisy in

i have a friend who has been at beth-hell since early in 1971. he is arthritic and went one time too many to the infirmary and finds himself with no job, no education, and no benefits after nearly 40 years working his butt off at brooklyn then at patterson.....please help me spread this video around.. thanks kids!.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nrh8kpexihk.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=nrh8kpexihk.

Fishbulb

JUST WOW. Using the scriptures from Leviticus to expose the double standard the WTS exhibits really made a striking point. It IS understood that these workers are VOLUNTEERS and agree to expect nothing in return, fair enough. But they are being treated as lesser than any schmo that wanders up to the facility looking for a hand out and the bible clearly states that even THEY should be looked after. Please keep us posted on the situation. Poor Jacob

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Someone please help me out on this one. Are JW's allowed to help....

by jetery in

anyone who is d'fed(like me- dont miss it) or disassociated,etc who may be in dire need.

i know that when u are disfellowshipped u are not allowed to associate with anyone who is a witness and they are suppose to shun u the rest of your life until u come to your "senses".

but anyway what i want to know is if im on the side of the road bleeding to death and one of jw recognize will they stop and help me or anyone for that matter.even when i was in the "truth" i always wondered about that since they are not supposed to have any contact with u. where do they draw the line when it comes to shunning people?

Fishbulb

Agreed. It would depend on the witness. The simple answer is Yes. The explanation follows When one is disfellowshipped they are no longer part of the organization and members of the congregation are instructed to treat their former brother "just as a man of the nations" or worldly. As a disciplinary action the congregation is also told to disassociate themselves from the "wrongdoer". With those principles in play it is perfectly acceptable for a witness to give emergency aid to anyone who needs it. The level of interaction and participation would be effected by whether or not the person was a practicing witness, your garden variety worldly person, or a person who was disfellowshipped. A level headed witness would take care of business and make sure the situation was handled and stable before excusing himself of anymore responsibility. The more emotionally wounded, less stable, more biased witness would probably allow prejudice and hurt feelings to get in the way of practical thinking. It's all hypothetical until it actually happens though so there is really no right answer.

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Hi I'm new here - a bit about me

by Fishbulb in

well where do i start?

i am 34, male and gay.

when i was about 15 i was exposed to the witnesses teachings.

Fishbulb

Yeah, DwTwnPhotog has played one of the biggest parts in my recovery process. I had just begun dating my man when I met DwTwnPhotog and his partner. Something about him kind of felt different. Suddenly being amongst all the worldlies, DwTwnPhotog still had a strange lingering familiarity to me for some reason. Maybe it was his demeanor. I don't know. Anyway, we got to talking and I learned that he had been a witness too. DwTwnPhotog had been out/out for a bit longer than I and was already in a relationship. He had been through it and really took me under his wing and helped me to stay on the right path. I have to give credit to his partner too as one who understood the mutual wound we shared and showed nothing but compassion and patience.

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Hi I'm new here - a bit about me

by Fishbulb in

well where do i start?

i am 34, male and gay.

when i was about 15 i was exposed to the witnesses teachings.

Fishbulb

THANKS for such a warm welcome again. It's so funny how the organization vilifies anyone on the outside, especially former witnesses, and makes it all seem so scary. You are all the antithesis of what any in the BORG would be led to believe. My username will remain a mystery for the time being. I will say though that it IS an oblique reference to my favorite T.V. show. Anyone who knows the show will know the reference

As far as my beliefs and how I view "the Truth" now, well that is still forming. I believe in God, a loving God. I believe in creation. I believe in the good nature of mankind and it's propensity for love and understanding. I don't know if I still believe that mankind was meant to live forever on a paradise Earth but how does one refute that idea with contradictory proof.

I guess I would still be a witness if I was either not gay, or if there was an explanation as to why I am with a practical way to cope with it. The crux of the matter is that the teachings of Jehovah's Witnesses had an answer for pretty much everything except for Homosexuality. Their answer for what they call "a mortal sin likened to murder" was to keep praying, to ask the brothers for help, to read any and all articles on it and to remain regular in field service, meeting attendance, and associations. Yeah though I gave it my very best shot, that didn't work for 13 years.

The Witnesses could tell me that they believed homosexuality was wrong, they could show me in the bible why they felt that way, but they could not EXPLAIN to me how I became gay (aside from simply calling me an imperfect human rife with sinful tendencies) nor could they explain why a loving God would hold me accountable for something I never chose. I could not come to terms with the idea of a loving God punishing me, constantly under repression, holding me responsible for something I never decided on. It was as if I was being punished for being born with blue eyes. "Oh just keep wearing those brown contact lenses Brother Fishbulb and maybe in the new system God will fix that for you."

I finally got fed up with hating myself and lying to myself that things would get easier. Things did not get any easier. If anything they continued to get worse as the straight people my age were getting married left and right and I had to sit through each wedding ceremony and be happy for them despite the fact that i would never find true love within the congregation. Everywhere I turned I was reminded of how I wasn't worth it and I got fed up. It was either suicide or leaving the JW's. I figures that if I was going to kill myself I might as well have fun doing it. I left, came out, and fell in love.

Ironically my move for self destruction turned out to be a move of self preservation. Having the distance from the JW's gave me a moment to think and put things together. I came to terms with myself and my sexuality. I came to believe that God DID in fact love me and that I did have a place to fulfill in this world. I'm not a bad person, i'm not a thief, I don't molest children, I don't murder people, I'm not a liar I'm gay and that's how God made me. If he intended to then I need to acept it. If it was his mistake I am sure he'll fix it when he wants to. For now I need peace.

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Hi I'm new here - a bit about me

by Fishbulb in

well where do i start?

i am 34, male and gay.

when i was about 15 i was exposed to the witnesses teachings.

Fishbulb

LOL Yeah I wrote my experience at like 11:30 and was just kind of blurting it all out. After I posted it I re-read and was like "Fowl Swoop?!?!" It's fell. I went to try and edit it but the edit feature was not cooperating and I was too tired and simply prayed that there weren't any other English Majors out there. lololol You know, come to think of it, it was like a scene from The Birds. A big Fowl swoop. :)

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Hi I'm new here - a bit about me

by Fishbulb in

well where do i start?

i am 34, male and gay.

when i was about 15 i was exposed to the witnesses teachings.

Fishbulb

Well where do I start?

I am 34, male and gay.

When I was about 15 I was exposed to the witnesses teachings. None of my family were witnesses but the teachings really stuck with me. I mean, who doesn't want to live forever on a peace filled earth? At about the same time I was coming to terms with my sexual orientation. At the age of 18 I found my self at a crossroads. Come out to my family as a Witness or be even more honest with myself and come to terms with my sexuality.

Well I became a witness. I really thought I was doing the right thing. I was trying to find the REAL truth and if that meant ignoring being gay, well, I figured it was a small price to pay.

Flash forward to 2005. I had been a baptized witness for 13 years. During which time I had experienced the "Truth", the truth about "The Truth", and had still tried to soldier on. Because I was the only witness in my family the meetings were at times a lonely endeavor. It was also the absence of family within the congregation that did a great deal to hold me back from achieving greater privileges in the congregation.

I tried to make use of the elders in the congregation but coming out to any of the responsible ones in the congregation is a dicey proposition at best. I had to pick and chose the people I spoke to about my "problem" very carefully. I seemed to choose the right brothers to speak with as all were loving and supportive. However, in retrospect, it really didn't do much to help my advancement.

Finally, after years of struggle things came to a head. Several brothers around me were quickly advancing and being appointed in the congregation while I remained an also ran. The elders in the congregation were in a political struggle with each other to the point of complacency and ignoring the flock. I had suffered injustice after injustice and my brain began to crack.

In about August of 2005, at the height of spiritual stress, I suffered 2 tragedies within my worldly family and I snapped. The stress was too much and i could not cope anymore. The meetings began to give me anxiety attacks as many around me were doing all that they could to make me feel very unwelcome. I soon left.

I met a man shortly after and fell in love. Instead of announcing this to the congregation I simply decided to fade away. Why? Well, there were some in the congregation that I truly loved. Real friends. So I thought that if I just stayed away I could atill keep in touch with the ones I loved. Afterall, So many of the elder's kids got away with dropping off their meeting attendance without so much as a brief slap on the wrist an were still able to keep all their friends. I figured this was the way to go.

It wasn't in the cards. The investigative powers of the brothers found one of my online blogs and soon began trying to reach me. Despite my absence a judicial committee was assembled, meetings were held, and I was disfellowshipped in a matter of weeks.

My family? They were happy for me. I had finally found myself. My friends? They were all gone. I had to make new ones. With this decision though came a new set of difficulties. My partner has no clue what being under the iron fisted rule of the FDS is like. He has no clue what suddenly losing all of your friends in one fowl swoop is like or even why they would agree to disown me despite still "loving" me. My partner is still upset with my hesitancy to register to vote.

I am actually very happy to have found this site and hope to make a new set of friends while at the same time continuing to heal.

-Fishbulb

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