Posts by redredrose

20

Fade vs. Disassociation - What's your reason?

by Nellie in

jw
friends

after sending my disfellowshipped sister-in-law a valentine's card last week, she sent me an email.

imagine my surprise!

after 15 years of being disfellowshipped, she told me that she reinstated one month ago.

redredrose

I began my fade inadvertently when I became very ill for a long while. There had been a number of problems in our congregation anyway, and now I had the time to identify questions and doubts that had never been answered. Finding the answers to these questions was a 'revelation'! What a sham I had been involved with for all of my life!

Now, several years later, I've maintained my relationships with a very few friends who are still JWs, and I still have family in. But since making the decision last year that this was not the Truth, I can see that the time is coming when my cover will be blown. This year will be the first that I will not attend the Memorial and just last night my friend let me know the date and told me she wanted me to come. I was caught off guard and didn't know what to say, and she asked me why I wasn't saying anything, letting me know she is going to push this. I told her that it felt pretty hypocritical to attend that one meeting after not attending any others, but she didn't buy it.

When it comes up again I still don't know what to say to her, so the end may be near. It might just be a relief.

So I think the reason most people fade instead of DAing is because they want to keep their relationships with friends and family.

36

Its Friday Time for Drinks Whats your Pleasure?

by megaflower in

jw
friends

.

its on the house, next.

redredrose

Umm - martini, Bombay Sapphire, extra dry, extra olives!

17

Vegas is another planet....i tore it up this week...anybody love it??

by oompa in

jw
friends

ya...had to do some business out there....but two days of biz....and five days total.... mean a helluva lotta fun....esp without jw wife!....dont ask how much i lost or it may jade my fun trip....but it wasnt pretty....i have always had decent luck with blackjack...no horror stories til now....then a friend taught me how to play craps.....now i really really hate it!!!.....

i played with a (minor) actor and his wife from beverly hills one night and we hit it off.....he took two hundred dollars and turned it into 1800 in three hours!...i learned a lot and was impressed...turns out it is not easily replicated!!!!

(and i tried three times dammit)....that game can suck your winnings dry very fast...so i dont like that and will not do it again..... poker tournaments are the way to go imo...i did pretty well on the first two i ever entered....fourth and sixth out of three and four tables and the entry fee is low...esp for all you can learn/earn and the fun you can have....very social too...lotta fun.........double life oompa reporting.......... there is no place like vegas in the world....it always amazes me....and btw...to make it even better...i hooked up with a big superfun family i have known for years that were in town as well....and ya...they are all out!...so we were comrades in sin city.....oompa.

redredrose

I love Vegas! You deserved to blow off some steam. Glad you had fun!

Only been one time (for a Jimmy Buffett concert) and had a blast. Partied all day and then all night! How can you not have fun?

Course if you had been with us, we'd have had even more fun! H and I are pretty open, but the friend we went with (you know who), being a faithful dub wasn't into gambling or 'nude revues'! So next time, we'll have to go together!

34

As a JW were You Told to Not Report or Be Silent about Child Abuse ?

by flipper in

as most of you know in 2002 barbara anderson and bill bowen were on the dateline program which revealed that child abuse victims had been theatened with disfellowshipping from the jehovah's witnesses for reporting child abuse to the police and authorities .

and this actually happened to many victims and their families for standing up in behalf of the safety of abused children !.

most here are aware of the out of court child abuse settlements the wt society made with 16 witness child abuse victims in 2007. a gag order was placed on victims so they would not speak of their experiences with the media.

redredrose

What I have to relate may or may not be relevant. But it is a situation I have firsthand knowledge of.

20 years ago two brothers ( 4 and 8) were sexually abused by a ministerial servant. They got up the courage and told their father, who subsequently confronted the servant. He confessed and the father filed charges against him and only then reported it to the elders. The elders were taken aback that it had already been reported to the authorities but went ahead and covened the judicial committee and disfellowshipped the servant. The servant's "fleshly" brother was an elder, and he asked the father to consider dropping the charges. Happily, the father refused and after a trial, the former servant was convicted and sent to prison for seven years.

Last seen this sex abuse offender was reinstated and had married a woman with several small children. I wonder if she was fully informed of his past before she married him. I shudder to think of those poor children.

Also, after he got out of prison he actually showed up at the hall where these two children that he had abused attended; and told the brothers that he wanted to attend meetings there ( most of his family attended that congregation). Thankfully, the brothers told him he needed to go somewhere else.

Do I think the elders would have encouraged the father to not press charges if he hadn't already done so? Yes! However, they did at least try to protect these boys after the fact by telling him he had to go to another Kingdom Hall.

I have no doubt that child molesters have, and are still, being sheltered behind the despicable principle of letting problems be handled only by the congregations as they are directed by the Watchtower organization.

6

Underworld fans?

by JimmyPage in

jw
friends

i love the first two movies, can't wait to see the new one.

i know someone on this board already has.

anybody else like this series?.

redredrose

Yeah, loved the first two. We're off to see the new one tonight. Can't wait!

30

American Life : Some questions

by LouBelle in

jw
friends

there are a couple of things i'd like to know about you guys:.

** why does it seem that so many have wooden homes?.

** 401k - is this a pension plan of sorts & are you obligated to take one?.

redredrose

As far as wooden homes, my home (in a small Southern town) is wooden, and it it is over 100 years old.

As for being proud of being American; I just happened to be born here. I am happy to live here and there are times I am proud of my country and times I am ashamed. I view myself more as a world citizen.

Do we bother to find out about the world around you? I certainly do, one of my favorite things to do is travel both here and abroad. My idea of travel is to experience my destination as if I lived there, not just as a tourist.

My husband is Native American, I am descended from the British, Irish and the Scots.

Fast food has its place but it definitely is not the bigger part of our diet. I love to cook from scratch and am very careful to prepare healthy (and hopefully delicious) food.

Am I and my husband typical? Probably not, but that is one of the things that make this country so interesting; it really is a melting pot of ethnicities and cultures. It is so large that there are big differences even within our borders; different accents, differences in cuisine, attitude and culture. You're sure to be fascinated when you come.

51

Major rant my Sunday at the Hall aka HELL, also need ladies opinion on creepy elder

by lola28 in

jw
friends

ok guys i thought i would update you on my sunday and how the study went.

i had to drive a few of the older sisters to the hall (one has a bum leg the other an injured hip and the other one has a hard time seeing), so i drove them to the hall and stayed for the meeting, here are some of my thoughts, first of the public talk.. i dont know how i made it thru the 30 minute talk without screaming bulls*it every other five seconds, the talk was about being no part of the world, and man it made me want to vomit.

first off, children are still discouraged from extra curricular activities, i dont know how they expect children to grow up and be able to function socially if they raise them to isolate themselves from their peers, dont they realize that they are raising social retards?

redredrose

I am mostly a lurker here, don't post much; but really Beksbks, did someone piss in your Cheerios today or are you always like this?

And Oompa, you are really rolling today!

23

God has a secret Man-Crush on Satan.........

by oompa in

jw
friends

here's why i say that.......it's like they are a couple, and god wants to break it off...but is having a really hard time doing so...... 1. garden of eden...satan starts trashing god, calls him a liar, and gets a couple to turn away from god....so this screw up (oh interferes with) gods big plan......and he doesn't zap satan?...he doesn't even punish satan?...he just curses snakes and takes their legs away??....fishy.

2. big meeting in heaven...in job i believe......and there is satan...still hangin with his homies.......no prob says god....just stay up here and corrupt a ton of my other angels...oh and go on down there and bitch slap job all you want...just don't kill him ok buddy?.

3. so thousands of years go by....satan is happily recruiting his demonz in heaven....and hey...since he is getting away with murder...why not kill gods own son?!?

redredrose

Oompa, ever thought about doing stand up?

This is freaking hilarious!

89

the high cost of divorcing a JW............

by oompa in

divorce is hard for everyone, unless the person is just jumping for joy to get out it.....but even then it can be rough....and you lose half your assets.....some people stay in bad marriages just because they can not afford to be divorced........ but esp if you are a born in jw.....you know what is so unfair compared to normal non-jw divorces????

?....what is so fukkin unfair?!?

!.......that you lose all your friends and family!!!!

redredrose

Oompa,

I am so sorry you're going thru this. It must be absolutely agonizing, whatever decision you make you stand to lose alot.

Not having ever been where you are, I don't have any good advice for you other than the predictable: take your time with this decision, make sure you know what you want.

From what you've said about your wife it doesn't sound likely that she would ever be willing to compromise with you, this has to be a factor in any decision you make. You have to decide what you want your life to be, what you are willing to live with.

PM me or call if you want to talk. I truly feel for you.

Love ya, Rose

51

Where did you meet your lover/partner/husband/wife and..

by mtsgrad in

jw
friends

was it love at first sight?.

.

mtsgrad.

redredrose

I am loving these stories!

At fourteen I first saw my true love riding down the street in front of my house on a bike with a boy I knew. I made the boy introduce us and it was love at first sight. At sixteen we broke up, still loving one another but at sixteen we definitely weren't ready for a mature relationship. We remained friends, married other people.

I moved several states away, he and his wife and 2 kids came to visit and stayed, working for my father in law. After a number of years, his wife left him and my husband left me. We both ended up in our hometown, single. He was the first person I called when my marriage broke up, and he helped me through it.

I was determined not to fall in love with someone who had 2 kids, but of course we never stopped loving each other, so a couple of years later we were finally married. That was 23 years ago.

As one of Jehovah's Witnesses I always said that if I were worldly I would believe we were destined to be together. The laugh is on me!