First of all congratulate yourself for being awake and that your heart was not blinded by the corrupt thinking that the others still decide to keep in the organisation. Many of us here have resigned as elders and are on our fadding journey. Please read through the forums on the advice to think and go cautiously in your fade. As for your wife, seems she didn't give you the real picture of who she really was before you got together. It's common. She sounds like one who would go all lengths to self preserve and make your fade (and life) absolutely difficult by talking about you to the jw's on all what you say and do.
Welcome, thanks for your post and sorry for the trials you are going through.