Hi Kenpo, welcome to the board. I can't say I care what they think about ME, but I care what they think as a result of what they think about me, generally speaking. I've chosen not to disassociate myself so they can approach me if they like, and just the other day they came by to invite me to the memorial, one of them had noted how happy I looked. I figure that's a "good witness" for the witness. Actually, I've come to the conclusion I was never REALLY shunned - even though there will be some of that even with active witnesses in good standing - but just generally ignored. They know I'm still out there, and that I'm still not going to meetings or anything, and yet I'm happy. I think when they're ready they'll talk to me, even if it is after they leave. Meanwhile I just remain "approachable", since nothing they say will bother me, unlike what I would have to tell them.
Introspection
JoinedPosts by Introspection
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27
Does anyone really care
by kenpodragon indoes anyone really care what active witnesses think of them?
i ask, because on many of the ex-witness boards i see a lot of mention of what people think others say behind their back.
personally, i hope the witnesses think i am the devil himself and fear me upon sight of me.
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Who ARE These People?
by Farkel init bears reminding people that there are a number of very high ranking men in brooklyn who are quite aware that the practice of disfellowshiping for just-about-anything is totally unscriptural.
they are aware of stories like the young girl who committed suicide did so because her sister caught her smoking a cigarette and threatened to turn her in.
they are aware that their blood transfusion policy is not supported by scripture and that approximately 10,000 jws were not given a chance to save their lives as a result.
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Introspection
Point well taken Farkel. However, on an individual level I think it is also worth reminding that when we use language that says religion, other people or the bible (simply a book, information) MAKE you do this or that, it is simply not true. None of those things can MAKE you believe this or that. Influence, yes, and the influence may be strong, but if you choose to buy into it that is you, not them. Of course, children are impressionable and it is certainly worse in those cases, but this isn't about placing blame. Frankly, if you want to move on and heal you just have to start making your own choices and think for yourself, and reacting to the WTS or whatever is NOT it.
P.S. - It doesn't mean you do not care or not engage in the work of exposing the truth, you are simply not letting yourself be emotionally hijacked. In fact, I imagine the work will be more effective if that's the case.
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THE LION WHO SAW HIS FACE IN THE WATER
by Nathan Natas inthe lion who saw his face in the water.
there was once a lion who lived in a desert that was very windy; and because of this, the water in the holes from which he usually drank was never still, for the wind riffled the surface and it never reflected anything.. one day this lion wandered into a forest, where he hunted and played,until he felt rather tired and thirsty.
looking for water, he came across a pool of the coolest, most tempting, and most placid water that you could possibly imagine.
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Introspection
"Fear only fear itself."
I thought Roosevelt came up with that, do we know what the original (or atleast a much older) source is?
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21
Who am I?
by Nicolas inthis might appear as a stupid question but i still find it hard to find my real personality.
often, i try to appear as someone else and the result is that i am shy because i have the fear of the judgement of the other people.
how did you redefined yourself when you got out of the org?.
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Introspection
The most frsutrating things is that some people had an easy life since they were born. Why did I have to live in an organization like that when a lot of people were just enjoying the life at my age?
None of that will matter once you realize that it's only things that have happend to you, not who you are.
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7
THE LION WHO SAW HIS FACE IN THE WATER
by Nathan Natas inthe lion who saw his face in the water.
there was once a lion who lived in a desert that was very windy; and because of this, the water in the holes from which he usually drank was never still, for the wind riffled the surface and it never reflected anything.. one day this lion wandered into a forest, where he hunted and played,until he felt rather tired and thirsty.
looking for water, he came across a pool of the coolest, most tempting, and most placid water that you could possibly imagine.
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Introspection
That's very encouraging, next time I will face those alligators in the water..
Seriously, not only is it the cause of fear but it was the lion's own reflection - his own self.
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How do you like them apples??
by Introspection inread this little story in a meditation book:.
a friend's son was in the first grade of school, and his teacher asked the class, "what is the color of apples?
" most of the children answered red.
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Introspection
lol.. Just for the record I think in that particular context the intended moral is about what's inside, and you might also look at it as the fact that most of the apple is actually white, just the skin, stem and seeds are not... And I guess that's only for the most part.
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Who am I?
by Nicolas inthis might appear as a stupid question but i still find it hard to find my real personality.
often, i try to appear as someone else and the result is that i am shy because i have the fear of the judgement of the other people.
how did you redefined yourself when you got out of the org?.
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Introspection
Flower another way to look at it is that the personality of someone who has "found themselves" is simply very open with a sense of ease, not rigid to the point where you can literally see the veins bulging from their necks. Someone like that is simply refreshing to be around.
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Who am I?
by Nicolas inthis might appear as a stupid question but i still find it hard to find my real personality.
often, i try to appear as someone else and the result is that i am shy because i have the fear of the judgement of the other people.
how did you redefined yourself when you got out of the org?.
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Introspection
Actually this is a very good question, one that most people don't bother to ask or won't explicitly state because it sounds corny.
The most reasonable answer I've been able to arrive at is that our personality constantly change, as does this whole concept of "I". But I'm okay with that. People can hang on to what's familiar, but sooner or later you'll probably run into some kind of conflict if that's the case.
But more to the point, I think it's a matter of allowing yourself to be who you are before the JW conditioning rather than redefining. Even for those who were raised as witnesses it is possible, I think it's just a matter of seeing our human nature.
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15
After JWs--NOW WHAT???
by Smoldering Wick inok, it's been four years for me since i left the jws.
i have been so busy trying to recover from the blow of leaving and losing friends, religion, a social group etc., that i haven't considered (too much) about what's next.
i mean, i've tried to be open minded and listen to other people's beliefs hoping that somewhere/sometime/something would click.
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Introspection
Shut up Ashi, you're giving away my secret agenda!
I suppose that picture doesn't help bolster my credibility, but I like it that way. People can read the words for what they are.
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After JWs--NOW WHAT???
by Smoldering Wick inok, it's been four years for me since i left the jws.
i have been so busy trying to recover from the blow of leaving and losing friends, religion, a social group etc., that i haven't considered (too much) about what's next.
i mean, i've tried to be open minded and listen to other people's beliefs hoping that somewhere/sometime/something would click.
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Introspection
Hi Smolder,
To be perfectly blunt, you can look for something external that you may like, but it may be somewhat superficial. If this spirituality stuff IS all within us, why do we have to go anywhere or learn anything, I mean really? Sure, you can read about different things and there's certainly nothing wrong with that, but there are a lot of people out there who searches high and low to find something that even they would agree is within themselves. That's just a little silly when you take a step back and really look at what's going on.
You can believe things - it's kind of hard to function without believing in anything. But just don't be so inflexible with your beliefs that you are closed to new perspectives. Some may go on to another religion or some belief system and there may be nothing wrong with that, but it's a matter of how you approach it. As time goes on your perspective may change again, but if you latch on to another belief system and give no real consideration to whether it makes sense, (even if "you" "like" it (for the time being)) then you're going to be in another situation where you have all this cognitive dissonance going on in your head. Just be honest with what you believe and why you believe it.
In answer to your question, I have kind of stopped searching. At this point you might say anything I learn would just be a matter of "deepening", but there are some principles that's fairly universal. And again this is the point I'm trying to make; there's nothing to search for really, you just have to see what's already here.