vikesgirl101

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Posts by vikesgirl101

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  19

  So I am writing my letter...

  by vikesgirl101 in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i thought i was done with the jw's.

  i knew they made an announcement last year about me.

  i assumed by the avoidance of so many, and my lack of enthusiasm for "the truth", as well as i have slammed the door on the elders many times now, exiled me.

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  vikesgirl101

  Actually, here is how complicated it is:

  I left my ex-husband for good about two years ago. I have a restraining order on him, because he would just walk into my new home, at any given time. Usually, it was to snoop, or to tell me that divorcing him was unchristian of me. I maintain full custody of our girls, but he sees them twice a week. I actually had it arranged so that he could continue taking the girls to meetings. Then, he stopped going entirely to all meetings. Our girls who are 13 and 8, have no interest in the JW religion now. But that way he couldn't say that I was trying to raise the girls against the way they had been brought up. Truly, I believe in free choice. If my girls want to be a JW, whatever...Just do whatever your heart tells you, not some man.

  The relationship with my ex is only to be related to the kids, and that is all. I am sure he will take my dismissal from the cong as a benefit to himself. He will probably start attending again, to prove a point. I know that it sounds entirely judgemental for me to say that, but I was married to him for 13 years. This is what he does.

  Scarred for life: As for what I told the elders, I just told them I wasn't up to that question that day, and needed space. It was obvious I wasn't feeling well, so they left me alone.

  Does anyone know what their goal was in asking "Do you feel that you are under the authority of the Christian Congregation?"? It is such an odd question IMHO.
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  19

  So I am writing my letter...

  by vikesgirl101 in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i thought i was done with the jw's.

  i knew they made an announcement last year about me.

  i assumed by the avoidance of so many, and my lack of enthusiasm for "the truth", as well as i have slammed the door on the elders many times now, exiled me.

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  vikesgirl101

  Hmm...You all give good thougts and advice. Do you think a letter is a BAD option? It will suck for me because my Dad is an elder still there. It will hurt them alot, but I feel that it is time to part ways. The issue is that I am not going to live by the their standards anymore. I divorced my ishy JW husband, and I may marry again someday (that makes me a harlot). Someone told me that if I divorced that I can never remarry (or date) ever again. I think this is insane. It's not that I plan to marry, I am just sick of their rules. The "No denim" law pisses me off too. How much of a cult is it when they decide the fabric of your clothes? I have a list of things that annoys me.

  I hate that we count hours. Doesn't God decide how valueable our service is to him?

  I hate that we ostracize "the world", but bang on their doors and ask them to join us in ostracizing others.

  I hate that tell you there should be an ethical format to your prayers to God. Let it come from the heart, don't tell me how YOU think it should be done.

  I hate that we disown family and friends because we think we are being better Christians.

  I hate that they intimdate others.

  Women are treated like they are lesser.

  So the question is be DA'd or DF'd?? If I tell them to stay away, will they just DF me? Will they look for dirty laundry to air out about me? What will they tell my kids? "Your Mommy is really bad...don't be like her."? If I say I do not want to be any part of them, disassociate me, will they leave me alone, and stop bothering me?

  Once again, thanks so much for the food for thought.
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  19

  So I am writing my letter...

  by vikesgirl101 in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i thought i was done with the jw's.

  i knew they made an announcement last year about me.

  i assumed by the avoidance of so many, and my lack of enthusiasm for "the truth", as well as i have slammed the door on the elders many times now, exiled me.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  vikesgirl101

  I thought I was done with the Jw's. I knew they made an announcement last year about me. I assumed by the avoidance of so many, and my lack of enthusiasm for "The TRUTH", as well as I have slammed the door on the elders many times now, exiled me. Alas, it has not. They broke into my secured apartment building last week (another issue) and asked if I felt I was under the authority of the Christian COngregation. WTF?????

  I hear writing a letter to them asking to be disassociated does the trick. Any suggestions on what to write? Someone said the less words you put in, the better. So it should be like this:

  To Whom it may concern,

  I, __________ __________,am asking to be removed as a member of your congregation.

  SIncerely X

  Any thoughts???
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  9

  How far will they go???

  by vikesgirl101 in

  1. jw
  2. friends
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  vikesgirl101

  Thank you so much for all your great advice. I didn't want to blow it out of proportion, but this does seem like a real issue. I think I will start talking to other residents. I did move here because the elders kept showing up at my door. Security was a major factor for moving in. Their lack of respect is unnerving.

  Thanks everyone!
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  9

  What Do You Guys Think?

  by jamiebowers in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i've been df'd for 21 years, and other than the heartbreak of my mom shunning me and the sad stories i read here, i never thought the dirty rat bastard wb&ts could otherwise effect my life.

  well, i was wrong!

  my dear stepdaughter recently learned that her children's paternal grandfather has parents and siblings who are jws, some of whom were at my stepdaughter's baby shower this past saturday.

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  vikesgirl101

  Question: Do you know of a pedophiolist in the congregation you are referring to? If the answer is yes, then use all means to safeguard children: no questions asked.

  In my experience, I only know of one JW that was a pedophiolist (still too many). I can't say that it is an attribute that is connected with them neccessarily. However, The one that I know (In Northern Minnesota) abused many kids. He served time in jail, and was df'd. What is annoying is that he was reinstated within a few years. With as judgemental as JW's are, how can he be accepted back without wearing a sign at the meetings that says "Don't leave your kids with me"?
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  19

  How do you replace a family?

  by YoursChelbie in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  as a result of wanting to have a normal life, away from the dogma of the jw religion,.

  many have lost contact with parents, children and in many cases, their spouse.. my divorce was uncontested and i was fortunate enough to get out of from watchtower control with my children.

  my parents were never involved with the religion,.

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  vikesgirl101

  Wonderfully stated, Jamie!
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  9

  How far will they go???

  by vikesgirl101 in

  1. jw
  2. friends
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  vikesgirl101

  Bummer, my post didn't work the firts time. So here goes. Two elders snuck in to my secured apartment building to reprimand me this week. I wondered how they got in. My land lord said they apparantly snuck in when someone was going out of the main entrance. He said they would take it up with management, because NO religious organizations are allowed on the property.

  I have many issues with this.

  1. I am in a secured building. You were not buzzed in. That is tantamount to breaking in.

  2. If you look for someone to come in or out of the building...and stick with me here...how long have you been driving by and watching my building?

  3. Why don't either of this 45 year old men have jobs? I know for a fact I do. I worked night shift. I was woke up. Thanks!!

  So how low can they go to intimidate people? Is it me, or are the above tactics tacky and unethical?
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  9

  How far will they go???

  by vikesgirl101 in

  1. jw
  2. friends
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  vikesgirl101
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  9

  How far will they go???

  by vikesgirl101 in

  1. jw
  2. friends
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  vikesgirl101
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  19

  How do you replace a family?

  by YoursChelbie in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  as a result of wanting to have a normal life, away from the dogma of the jw religion,.

  many have lost contact with parents, children and in many cases, their spouse.. my divorce was uncontested and i was fortunate enough to get out of from watchtower control with my children.

  my parents were never involved with the religion,.

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  vikesgirl101

  This has been really hard since my Dad is 69 and still an elder in the cong. Both my parents are so involved as JW's...it's almost maddening. They have known where my path is leading. I am 33, but have tried to leave the org. a few times. The guilt of being told that "This is the ONLY RELIGION" or "Armageddon is almost here, don't let your kids die because of your choice" has kept me a prisoner. There is never a true replacement for family, but I have watched my family stray away from me. That has hurt, but it forces one to make choices. To me, I am thankful for the family that calls me their "surrogate daughter". They are better than my parents. She is an ex-Jw as well. They call me every day. I am so blessed. The key is to make the first step and look for people. It has kept my life very full of new family.