To make reference to Greenie's post, I believe that Confuzzled's JW is bringing another person for two reasons. One, because, unless I got it wrong, it seems that you can't "study" the Bible with a person of the opposite sex. Two, because he knows he can't answer Confuzzled's questions, and that adds to his discomfort.
I can understand your feelings and your situation. I think I share it myself. Here I am, telling you to let go, but I myself don't do it fully. I have spent months reading stuff, and I keep discovering new things all the time. It makes me sad to the point of tears. I wonder if this particular woman has ever been truly happy. I have reasons to believe she was raped. I know she has had to endure poverty and misery (if the difference in the terms means anything) that no one should have ever had to endure. I can see that she is not free to love me, or anyone not in her small world. Her organization tells her that Christian love is limited to seven million guys, out of the more than six billion now living. She hopes she won't die. My heart is torn at the tought that she might bleed to death. Yet, all I can do is try to understand her world, and stay in the distance, where she will feel safe about me, so I can help her not to starve, not to make stupid decisions, and wait until she will see the light. My love, she knows she has it, and she knows to what degree.
I am sure you can see yourself in this picture, can't you?