Posts by garyneal

19

Incident with the Jehovah's Witness babysitter...

by garyneal in

jw
friends

my youngest daughter is so cute, she loves singing and loves being festive.

when i put up the tree, she loved saying, "it's christmas, it's pretty...." her babysitter, a witness from my wife's hall, lives next door to a neighbor who put up decorations in the yard like i did in front of our apartment.

when we leave her house, she would run next door to look at the "christmas" as she would say, "look, the christmas.

garyneal

I think if I had been the babysitter in that situation, I would try redirecting. The child sings Happy Birthday and I may ask her to sing another song, say the ABC's or The Wheels on the Bus. Not sure if she has actually tried this approach since I was never told about this directly. Since I promised my wife I would not get involved, I will not bother to mention it to the babysitter directly either.

Happy: Yes this is a phase, just as you say.

maisha: The babysitter needs to realize that there are other kinds of people out there and if she is going to take in non-witness kids, she needs to realize that these things can happen. If short, grow up, the whole world is much bigger than they are.

blondie: This babysitter is by far the cheapest considering how good she is with kids. A daycare center would easily run us $200+ / week for children her age. Since my wife and I had agreed a while back that she will go to a center at age 3, I am not too concerned. That decision is based on the fact that a center will engage the children more than a sitter. That said, she is still learning quite a bit thanks to the sitter. I will say that on balance, she is a good sitter and will certainly recommend her to other, in spite of her little quirks.

Qcmbr: I will have to say on balance, she is a good sitter and worth her weight in gold. But I would recommend pulling the child at age 3 though to better prepare the child for kindergarten. Our oldest was in a center since 4 months and you can see a real difference academically.

jgnat: For real, what can I possibly say to my youngest for singing Happy Birthday.

WTWizard: I do think about the molestation thing but she will be leaving soon. I don't think this babysitter is prone to molesting the kids, so no worries. Will keep the kids involved in holiday and birthday celebrating though.

Billy: I love it, LOL. Got to try it.

19

Incident with the Jehovah's Witness babysitter...

by garyneal in

jw
friends

my youngest daughter is so cute, she loves singing and loves being festive.

when i put up the tree, she loved saying, "it's christmas, it's pretty...." her babysitter, a witness from my wife's hall, lives next door to a neighbor who put up decorations in the yard like i did in front of our apartment.

when we leave her house, she would run next door to look at the "christmas" as she would say, "look, the christmas.

garyneal

My youngest daughter is so cute, she loves singing and loves being festive. When I put up the tree, she loved saying, "It's Christmas, it's pretty...." Her babysitter, a witness from my wife's hall, lives next door to a neighbor who put up decorations in the yard like I did in front of our apartment. When we leave her house, she would run next door to look at the "christmas" as she would say, "Look, the christmas." She also sings Happy Birthday a lot but I guess I never pay it any thought. I mean, why should I, these stupid rules are their stupid rules, not mine.

Well, evidently she has been singing happy birthday a lot at the baby sitters house too. My wife told me tonight that the babysitter told her that she sings that song too much and that my wife needs to get her to stop. The more she sings it, the greater the chance that the other kids will begin singing it. At least that was the babysitter's reason according to my wife. Then my wife said, "Well, I guess it is considered bad." Then I replied, "To who? I don't subscribe to the belief that birthdays are bad. Those rules don't apply to me."

The first question I asked was that if we (my wife and I) were both non-witnesses and our child was doing this, would she have said something to us about it? I understood that she does keep non-witness kids so surely there was the possibility that this could have come from one of them and/or that child's parents would find it cute that he or she sings the happy birthday song at two. My wife just simply said that all the kids she keeps but one has witness parents. Frankly, I thought she kept two kids who had non-witness parents but I guess not.

A lot was said and we even brought up the fact that she said nothing to me about it and that she too has a non-witness husband. I told my wife that I was not upset but that I would ask her how she would've handled it in the case of a child who had non-witness parents. If out of respect for her beliefs or the beliefs of the witness kids' parents, I would at least understand. However, how would I convey this to a two year old? What can a two year old possibly understand about respecting others beliefs?

I told my wife that she was free to handle this herself but also pointed out that if my child was singing happy birthday, I would not point it out as wrong because I think it is cute. My wife said that it is simply a song and therefore sees nothing wrong with it herself. When I asked her again how she wants to handle it, she said, "I'm just going to let it ride until September when I plan to put her in a regular daycare."

And there you have it. I won't say anything to the babysitter in regards to this incident since I do not want to do anything that may strain the relationship my wife and she may have. However, I have been a lot less subtle about what we do in front of her than I use to. I'm just simply tired of walking on eggshells around them people and am tired of not being allowed to be myself around them for my wife's sake. Especially since my wife just recently took my oldest daughter to a birthday party last Saturday and is going to allow her to go to another birthday party / sleepover this Saturday.

I can respect my wife's delimma in regards to wanting to be a witness on the one hand but wanting to live a normal life on the other, but I am not the witness, why do I have to tip toe around them like this? I don't! Therefore, I won't. I don't plan to go all out advertising everything we do around the other witnesses, but I am not planning to always watch what I say around them anymore either.

42

So...why is taking blood essentially viewed as unforgivable by the WT?

by sd-7 in

been hearing about this 'grey's anatomy' episode, and while i didn't see it, it brought up a question i wanted to throw out there, albeit a long-winded one, as is my usual nature.. the fact that people would rather die than take blood, as if...if they take it, they're doomed for sure to not make the new system--it doesn't make sense to me.

people both in the organization and the bible stories are forgiven for heinous crimes, murder, adultery, child sacrifice, everything up to and including denying jesus altogether.

(let's not forget child molestation and rape, apparently...) so why does it seem like this one act is presented to jws as one that's never to be forgiven?.

garyneal

Brother Hero told me that because it was mention in Acts then it carried more weight than, say, lying. The last time I checked the Bible there was only one unforgivable sin, and it was not a blood transfusion.

19

A Quote from the January Public Watchtower: SHOULD YOU FEAR THE END OF THE WORLD?

by Londo111 in

a little preamble: of the handful of online friends i've made during my time on jwn, auntbee has certainly been the best.

the time and dedication that she has to help jws is amazing, even more amazing when one considers she was never a jw herself.

she is very well read.

garyneal

Oh this is too good. LOL

5

ExJW similarities to ExMormons

by Christ Alone in

jw
friends

i've recently noticed that many that leave the mormon church have very similar experiences to those that leave the watchtower.

i thought that since we have so many new people on the site, it may be that some of them are still leary of reading or watching experiences from exjws.

i found an exit story from an exmormon family, and much of what they say is similar to our experiences.

garyneal

Yeah, they are all the same. I found a group of ex-IFBs where the fallout in that group is similar to the fallout in this one.

53

Another sad non jw falling for a baptised jw girl story

by spirituk in

ok ,so this is my story , this jw girl came on vacation in my country as a friend of my girl-cousin who is not a jw but were classmates at uni .

my cousin introduced her to me but she didnt tell me that she was a jw from the very first moment we flirt each other.we went on beach ,on bars ,cafes etc and she acted so wordly ,in fact i thought she could be a good one night stand with her behaviour .never saw anything weird about her that could lead me to question something, with the peak in the club where we danced together while hugging very passionatly .

i tried to kiss her that night but she kept her distance , i didnt notice any bad on that.anyway, next day we flirt again at the the beach and at night too .

garyneal

I WANT HER ! she keeps posting songs in fb telling that '' you will never know how much i love you '' etc she is so sad .. i am sure that some other people have made her take the decision to be away from me .. please help us..

Wow, um ,this is, um, WOW! Let's see, you both live in another country, she's removed you from her facebook, her brother has advised you not to go to another country to see her, she's not sure if she wants to be with you, and you still think WE can help?

Okay, here's how I can help. Go seek professional counseling and explain why you must have this ONE girl who is obviously wishy washy about you. Or instead, maybe you can go volunteer in some community center and get around a lot of other people and (more importantly) a lot of other girls. Go enjoy life and post all that on YOUR facebook wall / timeline. Perhaps she will see it and realize what a fucked up life she is leading trying to play to a cult or she will try to 'one up' you by trying to show how good her life is, or she might not care. If the first one, she may come around and something may spark. Otherwise, I guarantee that your feelings for her will eventually fade and you may find yourself defriending her one day as you slowly begin to realize that she really isn't at all worth obsessing over.

Go do something for yourself and LIVE, this obsession is not healthy and reflects more on you than her.

40

They Are Just Like The Amish (But with Electricity)

by OnTheWayOut in

i was describing jehovah's witnesses to a family member who had no idea whatsoever about them.

i may be straightforward and describe things in terms i have learned since reading about cults, but i was not over the top in any way.

i was simply stating the facts in a way that did not try to put any positive spin on anything.. my family member said, "so they are basically the amish but with televisions and electricity.

garyneal

Say that often enough to Dubbies and it may get through that they too are in a friggin' cult.

You would have to explain why the Amish are witnesses unplugged or they would never make the connection. Their first reaction would be, "No we're not, we mix in society. We don't live seperately like the Amish do." I was never a witness and that was my first reaction.

Most witnesses would never think too far beyond that.

40

They Are Just Like The Amish (But with Electricity)

by OnTheWayOut in

i was describing jehovah's witnesses to a family member who had no idea whatsoever about them.

i may be straightforward and describe things in terms i have learned since reading about cults, but i was not over the top in any way.

i was simply stating the facts in a way that did not try to put any positive spin on anything.. my family member said, "so they are basically the amish but with televisions and electricity.

garyneal

One of the major criticisms I had of the IFB's was that they seemed to espouse the Amish type of life. Meaning that they tended to favor the simple, plain, 19th century, Little House on the Prairie lifestyle. In fact, when I shared this with my other fellow former IFBers one of them said that they use to be called "those prairie kids" by their neighbors. The IFB's (much like the Amish) tended to view progress as something that came from the devil.

Isn't it strange that all these wierd little culty religions (IFBs, Mormoms, Amish, and JWs) all tend to want to favor the 19th century American culture as if the 19th century American culture is that perfect lifestyle especially blessed by God. I mean, if a certain type of culture were really so important to God then perhaps God would've preferred something closer to the culture of those who actually lived in Bible times. Wouldn't you think? The last time I checked, the ancient Israelites did not resemble in any way, shape, form, or fashion 19th century aggrerian America.

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