can you be df'd for atheism?
if you only tell the elders that you don't believe in god, and as a result will be decreasing your activity, will they reprove you and/or df you if you aren't repentant over time?
pretend that you aren't telling them anything about your feelings regarding the organization or governing body.
Mums the word!
Gradually decrease your activity, i used work and school as excuses. Any efforts made by the BOE for sheparding and encouraging can be thwarted by saying "No thank you, i'll call when i want to talk". Keep repeating this until they get the point that u don't want to be bothered.
as you guys know, i moved out of my home a year ago to get away from my verbally and mentally abusive jw husband.
turns out he was trying to force me out and was not unhappy when i left.
upon hearing that i was leaving, my oldest moved out on his own and the two youngest said they wouldnt stay there with him because he was verbally abusive to them as well, and they moved out with me.
Most cities have free legal services, look into it. Even if you don't qualify for representation, they will usually give free advice.
Is there is a "verbal" agreement btwn the relatives and your husband? Then your husband has to man up and tell his peeps to get out since he invited them to live there. Since your husband lives there and jointly owns the property, i think it would be hard for you to have the freeloaders thrown out by calling the police unless he is in agreement with this action.
If a written agreement is in place, You will have to file eviction paperwork with your city/county; it has to be a joint filing in my state when there is more than one owner. Takes anywhere from 30-90 days.
i saw a similar post on this board once.
but i wonder if anyone can use only the bible and answer the following questions:.
why do trees and animals die, since they didn't sin?.
Dgp, do you want scriptural citations?
i said that to my therapist yesterday morning...told her that the best way for me to describe my life was to sum it all up and say 'i feel like a barbie' - cause i do!!!.
every aspect of my life was controlled: what i am supposed to wear, my 'role' as a female in the cong, getting baptized, going in service, how i'm supposed to act and talk, who i'm to associate with (or not), going to meetings, driving 'certain' cars (no 2-doors), how to do my hair, whom to date and marry, blah blah blah...... when you add it all up - that is a barbie's life!!!
any girl that has played with barbie's understands that you are purely in control of 'her'.
Good analogy. I can totally relate to feeling controlled in thoughts and actions. Being limited in the cong because i'm a female.
i saw a similar post on this board once.
but i wonder if anyone can use only the bible and answer the following questions:.
why do trees and animals die, since they didn't sin?.
Good luck with getting the answers to these questions!
it is so strange how you look at things so differently when your eyes are open.
i recently went to a witness wedding and listening to the talk with the constant emphasis on the bride having a 'head' and being submissive to her head was painful to listen to.
and how the bride has to say 'deeply respect' while the groom does not, is the epitome of misogyny.
I have to agree with DGP. The outside is impressed with the "surface" impression given by dubs - the plastered smiles. They really don't know about the harmful stuff unless they join.
Also, even the nicest wedding talks place emphasis on submission, headship and the wife being the weaker vessel.
i just wanted to introduce myself.
my name is chris and i'm on my way out of the only "society" i've known.. i was raised a witness and have been a ministerial servant for a while now.
i recently notified the elder body that i will be stepping down and it will soon be official.
Welcome to the board!
thank you all.. it seems that we former jw's have excellent reasons to be be upset.
between being lied to about how russell and rutherford started this fruity little cult, having to deal with the coverups of pedophiles and other criminals, the mysoginistic treatment of women, being lied to about 1914 and the related date of 607 bce, the ridiculous and ever changing blood doctrine, being lied to about gb involvement in the un, the changed it once and now back again understanding of what a "generation" is, being lied to about when the end of this system was supposed to come, being lied to about 1975, being told not to go to college and instead explore the underrated world of window washing with the outstanding income potential it produces...... *panting* i am sorry, i am out of breath...... my point is this, (and i speak from experience): former jw's are pretty raw.
and thus, easily exploitable on internet boards by trolls.. trolls see this.
Well said ATJeff!
I lurked when the troll "R" was posting. What struck me about her was her lack of debating skills, her refusal to use or even research WT publications or use the NWT in her quotations. For lack of these things, nothing she wrote held any weight with this lurker. Many were concerned that she would influence the lurkers with her weak arguments. Not this lurker, i could clearly see that 'the truth' could not stand up to logical reasoning and facts.
now that i am free from my bonds to an organization dictating to me what i can and cannot do (in bed included), i cannot stop.....i feel like an addict on coke or something, i have been with my bf for eight months now, and perhaps it is a combination of the newness of a sexual relationship with the release from my spiritual bonds, but....i feel like a cat in heat 24/7.
of course my bf is not complaining even though i see he is physically tired parts of the day that i actually leave him alone (to go to work or sleep after hours of lovemaking).
i wonder if anyone else has gone through similar experience.
Damn, i'm jealous!
this is a really fascinating topic for me.....mainly because i'm single lol.
but what was it like to navigate through the waters of other people while getting into relationships?
did you wonder what to do about holidays?
Lots of good advice in this thread, here is my single female perspective.
It hasn't been a problem for me but then again i've only been on casual dates with non-dubs. Religion doesn't come up mostly and when it does i explain that i was bought up in a very religious household. If appropiate, i may share some aspect of my JW background but it's definately not THE topic of discussion on a date.
As for holidays...i go with the flow. Holidays don't bother me so i don't stress out about them. Decide what your current position is on holidays, your level of comfort. Are you comfortable celebrating some holidays and not others? Focusing on the non-religous aspects of the holiday helps (using non-holiday related cards, wrapping paper etc). Give if it feels right, don't feel pressured or obligated.
I'm a paralegal without a degree or certification; how i got in this field is a story for another day. But I always felt inadequate of my lack of education. No one ever judged me (at least to my face), it was my own thoughts and feelings about it. So i've gone back to school for my own peace of mind. I think that if you are a happy, adjusted and self-sufficient person, most people wouldn't not care about your level of education.
